What's up, lesser creatures!? I'm BARRY THE BADBLEEP! CEO OF BARRY'S BOMBS, BULLETS, AND FANCY BOOTS! I sell fancy boots because THEY ARE FANCY! YOU CANT GO AROUND MASSACRING HAPLESS SOULS IN THOSE BOOTS OF YOURS! THEY ARE HIDEOUS FOOT GROPERS! Mine have at least twenty grams of gold on each one, with even more fancy gems and shiny objects that may or may not be volatile! They weigh at least 90 pounds each! They may be impractical...BUT THEY ARE FANCY!
-Barry explaining his line of work
Barry is an incredibly tall, incredibly buff, pitch black timber wolf with yellow eyes. He compensates this plain appearance with his choice of wardrobe. He wears at least 100 pounds of precious jewels on his person 24/7, although most of his jackets are well over three hundred pounds. Even his Super Sonic jammies are diamond encrusted. His headwear consists of a golden fedora paired with golden sunglasses. They may cause more eye damage than the sun, but he still isn't blind, so he doesn't give the slightest crap. He usually wears a shining jacket made out of a precious stone he chemically altered into a flexible fabric. His list of jackets consist of the following:
- Any other Pokemon game I might have missed
His pants are no different, but he makes certain to not match his pants with his jacket. The highlight of his wardrobe is a pair of the fanciest boots on the planet, according to Mobian Monthly. It was made with the gems listed above all smelted into the shape of boots. Scientists said it was impossible, but he screwed every scientific law concerning gems to make these boots. It was paid for with Barry's first 100 billion dollars.
He is the perfect salesman. A flamboyant, obnoxious, overly enthusiastic, salesman. He always looks at the bright side of life. World hunger? Not for the carrion eaters! War? More money for him! House on fire filled with blind orphans? Too bad they couldn't see his fancy boots! Seriously, this dude can be cruel with enthusiasm at times, beating people to death with a smile on his face. He is willing to help those willing to make their own riches, especially those who do so violently. He has recently taken a liking to a group of treasure hunters on the island of Ricchezze for this very reason.
The only historical document of Barry's life is his self-authored biography. It tells of a lowly family of wolves living out in the wilderness. After he was forced to eat his entire family at the age of three, he traveled on his own. In his travels, he came across a group of alchemists promising the young pup wealth beyond imagination. Barry ate them, too. His journey led him to the island of Ricchezze when he hijacked a boat with only a spork. He was ten when he set foot on the island.
His wealth began with the discovery of the first treasure trove on the island. It consisted of any and all gems known to man and mobian. He sold them all, ate the buyers, and sold them again. People began wondering how a child can get so rich, and why salesmen were vanishing. He was under investigation at age 18 when people thought it was suspicious that the salesmen he met were conveniently eaten just after they bought his gold. Barry's last act of cannibalism was upon a private detective by the name of Holmes. He became frighteningly infatuated with anything expensive and shiny, so he studied chemistry for ten years without sleeping or eating any meals. He learned how to screw logic and make solid gems into fabrics. He sold some of these. He made a killing.
One day, when walking on the island, he stepped on a pinecone. This made Barry realize he had been barefoot all of his life, so he spent his first 100 billion on crafting boots made of gems and the tears of logic, which was screwed several times during the boots' conception. When he slipped them on, he noticed that they were big, bulky, and weighed 94 pounds. He loved them.
Now dressed like a champ, he made a home out of diamonds, which later became his center of operations for his next financial tactic. He started selling weapons and bombs after discovering the island's lack of both guns and bombs. Thus, Barry's Bombs, Bullets, and Fancy Boots was born. This was when he revealed the salesman inside him without consuming any other entrepreneurs. He was more enthusiastic than his idol, Billy Mays. Now that is saying something!
His rise to the wealthiest man in the universe was hindered by a group of hippies led by his current arch enemy, Brad, the Fabled Mega-Hippie. They still do battle this day, but Barry still successfully runs his business. He even got married to a live, solid gold, retriever.
He has recently decided to visit chat once in a while to sell his boots and speak in all caps. He also edits articles.
Some time after establishing fame on the wiki, he became the lunch of An Edible hedgehog, ironically. Once excreted, Barry ate him, and once he excreted Corn Dog, Corn Dog ate Barry again. They say this cycle continues to this very day
Barry: BUY MY BOOTS AND STOP BEING POOR!
He doesn't need powers to be a bad bleep!
- Badbleep strength (can lift 79 tons)
- Badbleep agility (can jump 79 feet high)
- Badbleep speed (runs at the speed of 79 miles per hour)
- Perfected the art of Bleep-kwon-do
- Can screw logic to make precious gems and metals into anything he wants.
- Skilled at Sodoku
He seems to feel a bit of pain whenever his sales go down, even by the smallest one hundred thousand dollars. If he were to go bankrupt, he would probably die. So his life relies solely on his infinite wealth..which is infinite...so this guys is just about as immortal as an OC can get without sounding like a dumpster fire.
- His personality is based off the fiction videogame characters Saxton Hale from Team Fortress 2 and Mr. Torgue from Borderlands 2. Both of them are incredibly rich, buff, and awesome weapons manufacturers.
- His favorite color is shiny.
- He eats 80 pounds of meat per meal. The only thing he lacks is a decent farm that can keep up with his appetite.
- He has a fear of pinecones