User:Fairfieldfencer/Sonic Meets Artemis Fowl

right|thumb|Sonic Meets Artemis Fowl. Coming 2010. Sonic Meets Artemis Fowl, or Artemis Fowl: The Future Chase, is a Sonic and Artemis Fowl fan-fic about Artemis Fowl in the Sonic universe. Copyright owned by SEGA, Sonic Team, Eoin Colfer, Puffin books, 4Kids Entertainment, Archie and Dic.

In the early years of the twenty-first century, teenage criminal mastermind Artemis Fowl is off on another daring mission to find one of the greatest enemies of the fairy people. With help from a close companion, this threat travels into the future where she uses her magic to be protected by newlyweds Princess Sally Acorn and Sonic the Hedgehog. With only three days to complete their mission, Artemis and his team of heroes are going to have to work fast to bring this criminal to justice and return with her back to the past. But what does she want that can only be found in the future? And why enlist the help of the heroic Mobians residing in New Mobotropolis? Read on to find the answers...

Author: Fair field fencer F F F

=Story=

PROLOGUE
Through the thousands of years the fairy people have lived and strived in the underground of the earth, many events and individuals have threatened to wipe them out of existence. Among those who stand out are Artemis Fowl, Irish teenage criminal mastermind, and Opal Koboi, a once genius pixie with an IQ of over three hundred.

Artemis has since been dropped as an enemy of the People, and has become a valuable ally since he first met Captain Holly Short of the Lower Elements Police Reconnaissance Division. Opal Koboi, on the other hand, has remained a constant threat to her fellow fairies.

During her lifetime, the pixie with the golden touch has founded her own company known as Koboi Laboratories and used her wealth to fund a goblin rebellion for the B'wa Kell. After that failed, she escaped arrest for a short time and managed to trap and kill the youngest full commander in LEPrecon history and blamed Captain Holly Short for it. It was later revealed that five years before this, she had captured rare animals by mesmerizing the leader of the Extinctionists known as Damon Kronski to further her magical power by extracting their naturally magical fluids and injecting them into herself.

This particular tale tells the story of how she managed to travel far into the future after she escaped imprisonment with the help of a close friend of hers. One so close to her, in fact, that you'd think them one in the same...

CHAPTER 1: DOUBLE TROUBLE
SPECIALLY CONSTRUCTED ISOLATION PRISON CUBE, MAXIMUM SECURITY PENITENTIARY, ATLANTIS, THE LOWER ELEMENTS

Opal Koboi was making yet another plea to shorten her sentence in her cell by writing a letter to a random politician. She was very displeased with her last attempt when Wing Commander Vinyáya had said she would release her, but it turned out to be a wicked trick. She had added her name to her vengeance list, which was just several names on a yellow piece of paper she had taken from the human world before her capture. Of the names only one was crossed out. That name was 'Julius Root'. The one person Opal had actually managed to get her vengeance on. But he would be far from the last if she had anything to say about it.

For the past three years she had been writing plea after plea to various members of the Council. During that time, she had been thinking over things. Thinking about how she could escape from this prison. Thinking about new plans and schemes for when she was out. And most importantly, thinking about her enemies and how she would exact her revenge on them.

The members of the Council would be sure to go. Especially that Vinyáya. Then there was the technical genius, Foaly, her school rival. She would have him dipped in the molten metal of his own creations. Then there was the dwarf called Mulch Diggums, who had helped in toppling two of her plans for world conquest. She often fantasised of tying him up in Death Valley and watching his body fry in the sun. Then there was that Holly Short with her pretty features that paled in comparison to Opal's own beauty. Oh how she loved the thought of her being thrown into a boiling pool of lava and watching her sink beneath the molten rock. And above all, that meddlesome Mud Boy, Artemis Fowl. He was the main factor in her plans failing. Opal could not even imagine a fate horrible enough to justify the human's interference in her grand plans.

Opal finished her letter and yawned. She was tired of being in this cell. Her only contact with the outside world was when the prison guards informed her that it was time for her daily meals through an old fashioned intercom. Opal reasoned that they must have spent so much money on the cell itself that they only had enough left for the intercom instead of one of the more high-tech communicators. She went over to her rather uncomfortable bed on the side of the cell. On the wall next to the bed were drawings of sea horses painted in pink, strawberry-flavoured toothpaste.

Then, just as Opal laid down her head on the cheap pillow, a feminine voice came through the intercom on the cell's wall.

'Hello?' said the voice. It was strangely familiar to Opal. She could remember hearing it before, but could not attach a face to the voice.

'Hello?' said the voice again. 'Opal Koboi? Can you hear me?'

'Yes?' said Opal, her face barely a centimetre from her pillow so as to avoid the security cameras. 'Who are you?'

'That can wait. I have hacked into the mainframe here to contact you and have shut down their recording. The simpletons will likely think it's just a malfunction. But blabbering about others' stupidity can wait. I've got an ingenious plan to help you escape from here. And you won't have to do a thing in return.'

Opal almost laughed at this. 'Let us not be reticent so early in our relationship. What do you want from me?'

'Nothing,' said the voice coolly.

'And you honestly expect me to believe that? It doesn't take a genius like me to know nothing in this world is free.'

'Oh, but by freeing you from imprisonment, I am earning a great deal. So listen carefully, Miss Koboi. Here is the plan that will set you free and allow you to start a new life. And above all, allow you to regain everything that was stolen from you on the day Artemis Fowl came into your life.'

Opal listened intently to the voice. Her plan was great, evil and sneaky, with just a touch of vengeance as well. Opal smiled when the voice finished telling her the plan. This girl was so evil, that they could have been related.

FOWL MANOR, DUBLIN, IRELAND

Fowl Manor has served as the estate and home of the Fowl family for the past six centuries since it was first built by Lord Hugh Fowl in the 1400s. It has been remodelled and refurbished several times in its existence until it became a stately manor. In recent years, it has occasionally been used as a battle ground by the third latest member of the Fowl line, for fights between either high-tech fairies or dim-witted criminals. Though only one other member of the Fowl family is aware of this, and even she doesn't fully know what has been going on for the last five years.

Fowl Manor, with its expensive decor and lavish garden, currently houses five Fowls and one bodyguard who could easily count for three of them.

One of these Fowls currently sat in his study facing a computer screen with his designer jacket over his chair, and his midnight onyx tie hanging loosely around his neck.

Artemis Fowl II had been racking his significantly large brain ever since he had returned from a trip eight years into the past three months earlier. That excursion had been to save Artemis's mother, Angeline, who had apparently been infected with a new kind of disease. But it had turned out that going back into the past had caused the disease by creating a time paradox. When Artemis and LEPrecon Captain Holly Short had themselves returned from the past through a time stream, they had brought with them the past version of Opal Koboi, the LEP's most wanted fairy.

Artemis and Holly had dealt with her twice before, but never with the powers she had given herself almost a decade ago. They had barely made it out alive. Opal's new powers included an extreme version of the fairy mesmer, that allowed her to completely control a person's body, and she had done just that to Angeline Fowl to give her the symptoms of the aforementioned illness.

Once Opal's trip to the present had been revealed, she had stolen Holly's standard issue LEPrecon suit, which had highly advanced technology woven into it. Opal Koboi was now using this technology to evade the LEP.

Artemis had dedicated himself to tracking down the past Opal and sending her back to her home time. The walls of his study were plastered with pictures of the village of Duncade and the area around it where she had escaped. Computer monitors were kept on twenty-four hours a day, showing Lower Elements Police reports of surveillance sweeps, illegal satellite footage and news websites should Opal accidentally give herself away. It hadn't looked like this since his father had been thought dead in Russia. But Artemis doubted any of the equipment he was using would help yield the critical results needed, just as he had when his father was missing.

Artemis was currently working on an energy tracking program that could locate Opal's unique magical signature. Once it was complete, Artemis was going to hook it up to hidden LEP trackers referred to as 'Scopes' placed on American communications satellites and it would lead them straight to Opal. But there was one slight hiccup in that plan.

The problem was that Opal's magical abilities came from the bodily fluids and liquidised body parts of endangered animals that either boosted her own powers or gave her completely new ones. Well, they were endangered eight years ago, but now they were extinct. All Artemis had was the brain fluid of a silky sifaka lemur called Jayjay. He was the only remaining silky sifaka lemur and was also the last animal Opal needed to become virtually omnipotent, but Artemis had managed to keep Opal away from him and Jayjay was now in the hands of the fairy people. If there were common similarities among the natural magic in the animal's brain fluid that matched the others, Artemis would be able to use that for his energy-tracking program. But he hadn't been able to find any yet, so Artemis was as stuck in square one as an elephant playing hopscotch.

Artemis got up from his chair and grabbed some new notes he'd just printed and tacked them to his wall with all the others. These notes were all written in a language Artemis himself had created to make sure no one else could read it and steal his ideas. This language he'd made corresponded with the Eternity Code he had created a few years earlier. Back then the language had been only been words spoken aloud and could not be applied to paper, but Artemis decided to match them together since it would take up less thinking time. Time he needed to dedicate to more important things.

Just as Artemis was ready to call it a day and was about to press his finger on the computer's shut down button, a new window opened up showing the long face of Artemis's old companion, Foaly.

Foaly was possibly the only person working harder on finding Opal than Artemis. He was a paranoid centaur and the LEP's technical consultant. The centaur was the main reason the humans had not yet discovered the existence of fairies, with the exception of four who knew everything about them. Despite all his genius and efforts, Foaly felt at as much a loss as Artemis did. Opal had managed to steal the centaur's own inventions installed in Holly's LEPrecon suit, and was using it to avoid detection from Foaly and every other officer under the world. So he'd felt a little responsible for Opal's escape.

Foaly had taken to calling Artemis practically every day in case he'd had any new ideas on how to prevent the present Opal from escaping her specially constructed cell. This, adding to his arrogance and love for sarcasm, had made the centaur an even greater annoyance than he usually was.

'Your brain thought up any new ideas, Mud Boy?' the centaur asked.

'It's nice to see you too, Foaly,' Artemis replied.

'Sorry for the lack of courtesy. It's nice to see you again, Artemis. Now, any new ideas how Opal's past self could spring her?'

'As I have said repeatedly, Foaly, if I think of something new, you will be the first to know. The men on security detail have all had thorough background checks, and not one of them has any link to Opal Koboi. The cell is state of the art and the only way you could get into the prison itself where Opal is being held would be with a nuclear warhead. I have had many ideas on how Opal could escape from her cell, and each one of them is even more implausible than the last. Have there been any signs of the past Opal?'

Foaly shook his head. 'We've caught no sign of her. She's even managed to block any system in the suit I could use to track her. It might take another few months before we catch her. I'll tell you, Artemis, the longer Opal's out there, the longer she has to think about her next move.'

'She is but one exceptional brain that has to live on the run. We are two highly resourceful genii who have out-smarted her before. And this Opal has no idea what we are capable of, so we have an advantage in that respect.'

'Tell yourself that often, do you?' Foaly quipped. 'But on a more serious note, Artemis, we've had a break-through down here. After Opal was arrested, we were able to get a warrant to search her home and all her computer files. We managed to find her journal amongst them and we've finally been able to crack it!'

'After three years?' Artemis exclaimed.

'Don't sound so surprised. Opal encrypted her journal with some sort of unique code I've never seen before. I expected it to take centuries to crack, but it looks like we caught a lucky break.'

'That's what astonishes me,' said Artemis, frankly. 'No offence, Foaly, but I seriously doubt an entire division of computer hackers could have cracked the journal if not for your "lucky break." Anything interesting?'

'Plenty. Opal made dozens of illegal experiments to further her wealth and power. There's a lot on here about the animal fluids too, so I'll send that over to you for your tracker. It should help a lot. I think that's all an impressionable mind such as yours should see though. Some of the things Opal went to... She even had a group of greedy elfin warlocks send a probe into the future to see the outcome of her plans and inventions. But apparently the warlocks were inexperienced in time travel and it landed way off course. Like, twelve thousand years into the future. Frond knows what might have happened if it worked and she managed to outsmart us all during the B'wa Kell rebellion. She would probably be queen of the world right now.'

That image sent a shiver down Artemis's spine. Mainly because there was every chance of it becoming a reality right now.

'Mulch sends his regards, but the stink he left behind will stay with me. Oh, and Holly told me to say happy birthday to you,' blurted out Foaly.

'It's a week late in coming, but tell her and Mulch thank you. How is Holly fairing?'

'She received her punishment from Commander Kelp for the time-travel incident, but it got cut short because of another Opal being on the loose.'

Artemis nodded. It was wise to pull every available officer in to look out for Opal's past self.

'What about your little side-project?' Foaly asked suddenly. 'Is it finished yet? I've got a bet going with one of my techies if you can actually finish it. Anyone with a good brain would bet on Artemis Fowl. So, naturally, my money's on you, Mud Boy. Don't let me down, now.'

'I won't. Give my regards to Caballine. And Mulch. Tell him Butler says hello too.'

'Don't worry. I will,' said Foaly, and terminated the link.

OPERATIONS' BOOTH, POLICE PLAZA, HAVEN, THE LOWER ELEMENTS

Foaly terminated the link. He then consulted his moonometer and realised it was time to head home. Foaly packed up his gear, stowed away his tinfoil hat that hid his brain waves from prying human intelligence agencies, and headed out of the Operations' booth of Police Plaza.

Usually it would take about five minutes to get from the Operations' booth to the parking lot, but security had been beefed up and it now took fifteen minutes to get through all the security equipment.

Haven's Police Plaza for the Lower Elements Police was currently on full alert because of Artemis Fowl and Holly Short's trip eight years into the past three months earlier. Everybody working in Police Plaza had been subject to background checks to see if they had any connection to Koboi and regular DNA analyses. No one was allowed in further than the front door without a key-card and the pass code. The LEP weren't taking any chances of someone sneaking in and finding a way of releasing Opal. Though she was kept in Atlantis and not Haven, the LEP had schematics of her cell and maintained constant watch over Opal from the Operations' booth. And it was highly possible that the past version of the genius pixie could think up of some way of freeing the present Opal from Police Plaza that no one else had. That thought alone was enough to terrify the higher-ups of the LEP.

After struggling through the crowds of people heading into Police Plaza to either complain about the recent goblin lootings or the swear toad infestation, Foaly exited through the main entrance and made his way to his personally manufactured MagnaCar.

Previously, fairies had travelled around in cars powered by magnastrips on the roads of Haven. The cars had thin pieces of metal built into the bottom, which absorbed energy from the magnastrips and allowed the cars to be pulled along by them to get the drivers to their destination.

But Foaly, as usual, had come up with an even more efficient way of getting around that used less energy. Using electromagnets built into the bottom of the new MagnaCars, Foaly was able to make to them fly in the air by reversing the polarity of the magnastrips lying on the roads of Haven so they both were on the same frequency, making them repel each other. Foaly then added a nuclear engine that allowed the MagnaCars to be moved forwards and backwards and allowed them to be turned. The newer models with retractable roofs were constantly being snatched up by fairy jocks, though this was not a very sensible option. Because they had been told that the magnets were extremely sensitive due to their power, goblins had been leaving tiny magnets on the roads so as to upset the magnetic fields and make many a said jock get thrown out of their cars. They then threatened said jock at fire-ball point and either robbed him or stole parts from the car to sell in the back-alleys.

Foaly walked out of Police Plaza to the parking lot where he had left his fine invention, only to find the hood of it opened with missing engine parts. Someone had somehow managed to bypass the finger print activated start button for the car and had opened up the hood and stole some of the more essential engine parts. No doubt to sell them on the black market for a fine price.

Foaly stowed his shocked surprise and sighed at the sight of his beloved invention and walked over to get a closer look. Burn marks surrounded a melted hole where the finger print scanner had once been. The only answer Foaly's intellectual brain could think of was that goblins had somehow burned through the finger print scanner, and then hot-wired the car to open the hood. But that was impossible. Goblins barely had enough brain power to light a Glow Cube. Hot-wiring a MagnaCar was way beyond their intellectual capacity.

Foaly quickly took a look around to see if any of the goblins might still be around looking to rob the car's owner, but he instead saw a free taxi driving nearby.

'Taxi! Taxi!' Foaly yelled out.

The cab pulled out to the side-walk and Foaly got in. He hated having to take taxis, or any car that had not been personally designed for a centaur. There wasn't any room for him to sit down, so he could only lean against the seats with both seat-belts strapped around him to keep his large horse body secure. One time he had to share a taxi with a dwarf who was coming home from a busy day in the tunnels and had forgot to release the air he swallowed while digesting through all the clay in the mines. The taxi had flown over a magnet on the road, and Foaly had bumped into the dwarf's stomach. It had taken the centaur a month to get the smell out of his lab coat, and the taxi driver several months before he could get another customer.

Foaly fastened the two seatbelts around his front and hind quarters, tried to get in the most comfortable position possible for him and then told the driver where he wanted to go.

'I swear things are getting worse around here,' said Foaly, making conversation with the taxi driver. Although her face was out of sight, Foaly could tell the driver was a girl by the long hair sticking out of the back of her baseball cap and feminine hands on the wheel.

'Goblins have even worked up the nerve to steal car parts not two miles from Police Plaza,' continued Foaly. 'And they're getting smarter, if you can believe that.'

'Things can only get better and improve,' said the taxi driver. 'Look around! Who would have thought eight years ago that Haven would have such wonderful mechanisms and gadgets like there are today?'

'Oh, they are wonderful. I designed most of them. Pure genius. The Council should really be giving me a better budget for-' Foaly stopped mid-sentence after realising something. 'Eight years ago? Pretty odd number. People usually say ten or five. But you said eight. Something important for you happen eight years ago?'

'You never miss a trick, do you, Foaly?' said the taxi driver, and turned around to show her face. The face of the past Opal Koboi.

'Opal!?' exclaimed Foaly. 'What are you doing driving a cab? Insane-genius-bent-on-world-domination not paying the bills?'

Opal let out a shrill laugh like a harpy at the joke. 'You always did have a sharp wit about you, Foaly.'

While Opal was talking, Foaly was trying to open the door, but it was locked and the windows couldn't be wound down.

'Like my little taxi, Foaly? I modified it just for you,' said Opal in a dreamy little girl voice.

'Well if that's true, then you could have at least put in more comfortable seats,' said Foaly.

'Oh, but they are comfortable. Why, you could sleep like a baby on them,' said Opal, and pressed a button on a hidden control panel.

A window came up from behind her seat, cutting off all access to the passenger section. Hidden pipes were then activated and a special mixture of sleeping gas and fairy anesthetic that, while non-lethal, would leave Foaly in a comatose state was emitted.

'Nighty, night,' said Opal. Once the centaur had been knocked out cold, Opal dragged him from the taxi and dumped him on a side-walk, which was no small effort as the centaur was over twice her own weight.

'Phase One complete. Now on to Phase Two,' said Opal with a devious smile on her face as she drove off.

CHAPTER 2: ALL THINGS SHORT AND BRILL
KOBOI LABORATORIES, EAST BANK, HAVEN CITY

Koboi Laboratories, once a company that supplied consumer products and advanced weapons to the Lower Elements, now lay in Haven's East Bank, waiting to be renovated into something new.

A hotel company currently had their eyes on the place, though it didn't have the kind of view tourists paid for. Eight stories of rooms and departments and all you could look at was the surrounding half a mile of granite.

Captain Holly Short of LEPrecon was in the front of an LEP MagnaVan escorting two prisoners, convicted of assisting in the attempted exposure of the People and illegal animal fluid harvesting, to the old Koboi Labs.

Usually, Holly's job was to go up to the surface and locate fairies that had illegally travelled to the humans' domain and then let LEPretrieval do the rest of the dirty work. But with a past version of Opal Koboi on the loose with powers no normal fairy should have, every available officer was being pulled to check out possible sightings or leads.

Recently, the infamous Brill brothers who had helped free Opal Koboi from the J. Argon Clinic and served as her assistants had revealed there to be a secret laboratory hidden in the old Koboi Labs building with research on the illegal animal fluids Koboi had been harvesting hidden on a chip. After a team of investigators had been sent to confirm their story, the Brills made a deal to get the LEP into the lab for six months off their appointed sentence.

So now Holly was escorting them in a MagnaVan with the recently promoted Captain Grub Kelp. Many a fairy had lost money over that one. Including Holly.

Grub was the brother to Commander Trouble Kelp, a decorated officer who more than deserved to lead LEPrecon. Grub, however, was... Well, pretty much the opposite of his brother. Nowhere near his level of bravery, and certainly not a born leader.

Rumour had it that Commander Kelp had only promoted his brother to bring him closer to a desk job when he became a major, just the type of occupation Grub was suited for. Plus, it got him out of action, which worked seeing as it wasn't Grub's strong point. Nagging and whining were what he was suited for, along with making complaints about the tiniest flaws caused to his possessions during work hours. Today it was his helmet.

'It's too tight,' said Grub. 'It's all these new features they put in. No room for the blood to circulate. It's been giving me terrible headaches.'

Holly sighed. Five more minutes talking to Grub and she'd have a migraine of her own.

Holly drove up to Koboi Labs and parked in an unmarked space. The building was a sorry sight. The Council hadn't been willing to renovate it until every last area in the facility was secured. Opal was a genius, and there was no telling what surprises she'd kept in there for intruders.

Holly and Grub went around to the back of the MagnaVan and opened the double doors. Two pixies were inside. Their names were Mervall and Descant Brill, the infamous Brill brothers who had helped Opal obtain her illegal powers years ago and almost take over the world by exposing the People to the humans.

They were serving fifty years in prison. It hadn't suited them. Many of the crooks down at the Haven Penitentiary hadn't been too pleased to find that two of their fellow in-mates had almost killed them all by helping Opal Koboi. It had been rough for them, and pixie skulls were delicate. One good whack and they could be on the happy train to loony land, or possibly riding the hearse to their recycling ceremony.

The Brills were desperate to be out of prison. That much was obvious by them taking a meager six months off their sentences. So Holly and Grub had to be on their toes. And while Grub hadn't been on his toes in so long that his feet ached whenever he had to reach up for something high, Holly made sure she was always at the ready. Pixies were clever and formidable when determined, and not to be underestimated.

Holly and Grub took out their new Neutrino 3000s and set them to level one, or lights out as the guys in LEPretrieval called it, to let the Brills know not to try anything.

So, with guns to the backs of the Brills, the four of them stepped into Koboi Labs.

It had become destitute without proper care. Major work would have to be done on the wiring to make sure a guest wouldn't accidentally activate the building's self-destruct system while flicking through the channels. A lot of work had to be done on everything, but the Council was willing to give grants to whoever renovated the facility seeing as it could be a potential danger to the public.

'Brings back memories, don't it, bruv?' said Scant, his head low and hands secured in cuffs.

'Yeah,' agreed Merv, who was the same. 'Doing the devil's work, ghastly working conditions, Opal screaming at us day and night.'

'Happy days.'

They stopped when they'd reached the west wing of the facility. Holly lifted up her visor and looked Mervall Brill squarely in the eye.

'Where to from here?' she asked.

'Down that corridor on the left, then stop when you see the first broken computer interface,' said Merv.

'No, the second,' piped up Scant.

'No, it was the first. When you pressed the second, it led to a sewer filled with swear toads Opal was experimenting on. I'd never heard such bad language in my life before that day. Well, maybe when you blurted out Miss Koboi's ankles looked chubby. That was a really bad move, bruv.'

'I was under a lot of pressure!' protested Scant.

'Stow it, the both of you,' said Holly. 'There'll be no delay tactics so you can think of more ways to escape while I'm around. Now move.'

She emphasized her point with a light shove of her Neutrino to their backs, and the Brills walked forward until they came to the aforementioned computer panel.

It was built into the wall with three keys of Gnommish missing and a piece of paper stuck to it with the word 'Malfunctioning' printed on it.

Merv ignored the piece of paper and typed in a few commands on the broken keys and then placed one pixie hand on the computer interface's screen, which then scanned his palm and finger prints.

A secret door then slid back, revealing a dark room.

'You're sure this isn't the one with the swear toads?' asked Grub. 'Those things can really hurt if they bite, not to mention offend.'

Ignoring her comrade, Holly ordered the Brills to move forward.

The lab was not much different from the rest of the facility. All broken down and degrading.

Holly could spy a few modified Softnose lasers on a workbench. Opal had teamed up with the treacherous and insane Briar Cudgeon to arm the major goblin gang known as the B'wa Kell with these weapons to terrorise the city and then betray them for their own benefit. In order to keep the operation secret, they had to steal human-made batteries instead of making their own power sources for the Softnoses.

Holly smiled fondly at the memory of the event. It was the first time she'd been beside Artemis Fowl as an ally and not an enemy. It was unbelievable to think she'd made friends with him. Though perhaps not the best of friends. Past experiences would probably never allow something like that to happen.

'Where's this chip?' asked Holly.

'It's sealed in a draw in that desk,' said Merv, pointing to a table with a computer on it. 'The draw's locked. You have to put in a password on the computer to open it.'

'How do we do that?' asked Holly, while Grub busied himself cleaning a spot of dirt off his handgun.

'There's a ghost drive on the system. Go to it, and you'll see an area where you can enter the password.'

'Are there any traps we should worry about?'

'Yes. The drawer won't open until five seconds after you've put in the password. By then, you need get at least five feet away from the drawer. When it opens, anybody standing within five feet gets blasted by lasers.'

'Lasers?' asked Grub with a touch of fear in his voice. 'Where?'

'You see those little black domes on the ceiling?' said Merv. 'The ones that look like security cameras?'

'Yeah.'

'Well, they ain't.'

Holly nodded. Hidden in plain sight. That was just cunning enough to be Opal's work.

'Captain, keep your weapon on the convicts, if you're quite done cleaning it.'

Grub sensed Holly's tone of hostility, and he quickly aimed his new Neutrino at Merv and Scant.

With the twins covered, Holly sat down at the desk.

'What's the password?'

'It's a series of numbers,' said Scant. 'Opal's birthday, the Haven area code, and how much Opal is worth. Was worth.'

Holly put in all these numbers and then hurriedly rush away once she'd pressed the confirm button.

After five seconds, the drawer stayed shut, and then the computer monitor brought up a new window with a flat neon green line against a black background. Then, a voice came from the computer, and the line started jumping erratically.

'Voice authentication requested,' said the computer in a feminine voice commonly used for consumer help-lines.

'Voice authentication?' dim-wittedly asked Grub. 'What's she talking about?'

Holly quickly jumped on top of Grub, and the force sent them both flying underneath the desk. This was lucky, as the laser system the Brill brothers had pointed out had activated the moment Grub's voice had been diagnosed as unrecognised, meaning he was intruder.

The desk would provide them with cover for now, but they needed a strategy to get them out of the situation before it was reduced to so much melted plastic.

Meanwhile, the Brills were trying to get over to the workbench where the Softnose was without getting a hole burned through them. They could use the gun to blast away the titanium chains that were keeping the cuffs together.

Holly turned to her comrade, his body shaking so fast it was as if he'd just consumed ten bags of sugar, thirteen bottles of coca cola and fifteen cups of coffee to finish.

'We've got to do something quick!' Holly yelled at him over the laser fire.

'You're the experienced one!' hollered back Grub. 'You think of something!'

'We're both captains, for Frond's sake. Surely you have an idea, or aren't you worthy of the acorns on your chest? You know what, that was a dumb question.'

Grub's shaking stopped instantly, just as Holly knew it would. Grub was never unable to defend his pride.

'I am too! I went through the procedure just like you did! I was even outnumbered.'

'Pull the other one!' said Holly while aiming her handgun at the nearest Brill. She couldn't allow them to escape.

'It's true!' butted in Grub, disrupting her concentration. 'I was up against four. I shot one with a paintball just like you're supposed to, and I was promoted.'

Holly let a warning shot fly at Mervall Brill before replying. 'How can you have only shot one and be promoted?'

'He was the leader. Those are the new rules. Shoot one, and they all go down.'

Of course! If Holly shot one of the lasers, the neutrino charge could run through the defensive grid and fry it. She'd have to be quick though. The moment the lasers were open to her, she was open to them.

She quickly poked her head out from underneath the desk. The closest laser was about a foot away from them. Holly had her computer target it and got ready to fire. The lasers struck every two point five seconds, so she had less than three seconds to shoot it and duck out of harm's way.

'Grub, I've got a plan.'

'Oh, good for you,' said Grub, sarcasm poking through the fear.

'But I'm going to need your help. I'm going to shoot the closest turret and overload the system. The moment I take the shot, you pull me back under the desk. Mess up and I will spend my entire afterlife haunting you until the day you don't quiver at the sight of a spider.'

Grub paled. That was a long time.

Holly swallowed her distress and gripped her handgun firmly. She pulled a chair under the desk and tossed on its side with Grub supporting it.

After she got her nerves straight and a laser fired, she kicked her legs at the chair, sending her out from safety and wide into the open. Within a second, she took the shot, and then Grub pulled her back underneath the desk.

A laser had hit her head, but her helmet had saved her on that occasion. Electrical sparks played about the laser, but they didn't carry on to the rest. Now it was Holly's turn to pale. Her plan had failed.

Merv and Scant were now free of their handcuffs and laughing like crazy.

'Ha ha! Nice try, Short-stuff!' cried out Scant.

Four things happened all at once. Holly lost her temper at being called 'Short-stuff,' fired a single shot at Scant that missed, the computer registered Scant's voice as friendly, shutting down the laser system, and then opened the drawer containing the computer chip.

Holly and Grub got out from under the desk, murder sparking in their eyes and Merv and Scant's laughter fled them.

Holly and Grub advanced on them weapons drawn. They could still be dangerous now that their hands were free.

The two recon captains noticed Scant eyeing the Softnose laser nearby, lying next to the broken cuffs.

'Go on, Descant,' said Holly. 'Go for it!'

'Yeah, if you're feeling lucky, punk!' piped up Grub.

Holly slowly turned her head toward her fellow captain in a fashion that emanated danger.

'Grub, never quote Clint Eastwood movies in my presence again. You completely kill the lines.'

Scant was smart enough not to go for the gun, and now he and his brother were being loaded into the back of the van.

'We were going to escape to Atlantis,' sighed Merv.

'Freedom, Atlantean girls and all the fresh fish you could eat,' commented Scant.

Holly shut the doors on them, wiping sweat from her brow with a large grin. The adrenaline in her system felt good once all the fighting was over.

Up front, Grub was wearing his apparently too tight helmet, and talking to Police Plaza with a grim expression on his face, as if what he was hearing was unbelievable.

'What's up?' asked Holly when he'd finished. 'Don't tell me you've been promoted to major.'

Grub was so shocked at the news he didn't even try to defend his pride.

'Holly, I'm going to need you to brace yourself for this,' he said. 'You might want to sit down in the van first, if you like.'

Something about Grub's tone made Holly's exhilarated smile lessen until her teeth were no longer exposed. When Grub told her what was wrong, her smile vanished altogether.

Foaly had been found not too long afterward by a couple of passing gnomes and was immediately sent to the Haven Clinic downtown. The warlock medics there determined that he had somehow gone into a comatose state, and LEP investigators reasoned that goblins had somehow been the cause of it. According to their finds, at least one goblin had burned his way into Foaly's MagnaCar, hot-wired it to open the bonnet and had stolen some engine parts. Then Foaly must have stumbled across them and tried to stop the thieves, but it looked like they had somehow rendered him comatose. Possibly by a very hard blow to the head.

Any human in Foaly's condition would likely never come out of the coma, but humans didn't have fairy friends healing them with magic. With Foaly receiving daily bursts of magic into his system, he would likely be back on his hooves again in the next few weeks. But a few weeks was too late.

Someone had managed to penetrate Haven City's virtual defences and was running havoc on all things electronic. Mobile phones began ringing at all times and when you answered them you were greeted by some rather unpleasant noises that were usually issued by dwarfs. Fairies ordering food at drive-thru windows were greeted by some choice swear words recorded from various talk-shows, and the less said about Haven's plumbing system the better. But if you really must know, let's just say geysers have been spotted in people's water closets at rather inconvenient times. One unfortunate elf had been answering Mother Nature's call while reading the paper and shot straight through the roof when Old Faithful suddenly erupted from his bathroom's waterworks.

It was only time before some of the more essential systems were hit. Like the ones making sure that the Mud Men could not detect Haven and come down to exploit its resources.

The Council were desperately seeking a way to restore order in their city and bring calm back to the People. They had always depended on Foaly during times of technical crisis, and the centaur constantly boasted that he was the only one that kept Haven running. They hadn't realised just how much truth there was to that until now.

Reasoning that desperate times called for desperate measures, the Council voted to make a deal with the only other person under the world who could help them: Opal Koboi. In exchange for restoring the city to normal, they would lift two hundred years off her sentence.

Many of the Council members objected to this at first, but they quickly realised that they had no other option. So Opal would be led from her prison in Atlantis to Haven's Operations' booth to fix the mess by a team of the highest ranking LEP officers there were. One of which had all too many encounters with Opal Koboi in the past.

CHAPTER 3: AND THEN THERE WAS OPAL
MAXIMUM SECURITY PENITENTIARY, ATLANTIS CORRECTIONAL FACILITY, ATLANTIS, UNDER THE OCEAN

Captain Holly Short walked alongside the new members of LEPretrieval One while Wing Commander Raine Vinyáya led the group towards Opal's specially constructed isolation prison cube.

Many of the previous members of LEPretrieval One had been promoted to cushy desk jobs in the three years Holly had been away in Limbo, but there were one or two faces she recognised. Obviously these fairies believed that they were not ready for desk jobs just yet, or possibly they loved the excitement of dangerous missions when above ground too much. Holly knew about being in that position.

Three years ago she had been up for the rank of major, the career turnaround of the century as she had previously been the only fairy in recon history to have two simultaneous Internal Affairs investigations. For a while Holly intended on refusing the position, but her late superior Commander Julius Root, who had opted for her promotion, told her the same words his commander had told him. That the position as a major was not for her, but it was for the People. Holly then changed her mind about it and intended to accept the position, but then Opal Koboi escaped from the Argon Clinic and had the Commander killed, and framed Holly for his murder and she quit once a new commander had been appointed to try and do good without a badge on her shoulder.

Then when she and Artemis Fowl had saved the demons on Hybras and a new commander was appointed during her three year leave, she rejoined the LEP. Then she went and broke a few major rules by going back in time to save Angeline Fowl from what appeared to be Spelltropy, but it turned out it was an Opal Koboi from eight years ago mimicking Spelltropy. When Opal had learned of the time portal Artemis and Holly had used, she followed them back to the present and escaped arrest and being returned to her own time by the LEP.

Holly was then punished for this by receiving LEPtraffic duty for two weeks. It was supposed to be three months, but with another Opal on the loose, the LEP needed every available officer to help on the fairyhunt for her.

Holly couldn't believe the Council was actually willing to shorten Opal's sentence by even a second after all she'd done. Let alone two hundred years. Though, truth be told, it was logical. Opal had one of the greatest minds the fairy people had ever known. But just because it was logical didn't mean she thought it the best of choices.

The maximum security penitentiary was roughly as high-tech and security prone as Section Eight Headquarters had been on Holly's first visit. Foaly had personally constructed this wing and had updated it since the past Opal's escape.

As they walked along, security cameras and devices took pictures of all members of the group and their identities were confirmed at least fifty times before they made it to the end of the hall.

Wing Commander Vinyáya pressed her hand against a plate of liquid metal that Holly recognised as flux metal.

Flux metal was another of Foaly's inventions. It was metal saturated with nano-sensors. The nano-sensors would read through everything from Wing Commander Vinyáya's handprint to DNA. It was so high-tech that even is someone cut off the hand of someone who had access to Opal's cell and used it, the flux metal would detect a lack of pulse and fail to allow that person entry.

Opal's prison cube had been designed by Foaly and made with the help of Altantis's top mechanics, technicians and engineers. The cube was air-tight as it was surrounded by six hundred thousand gallons of water, which was roughly the same amount used in Olympic swimming pools. The cell had been given an air supply through a large tank attached to the cell directly opposite the cube's airtight access tunnel. Pipes attached to the cell had been deemed too risky as pixies were nimble creatures and could possibly squeeze through large enough pipes, and they weren't taking any chances with Opal, so the idea of air pipes had been dropped altogether. So they had opted for the tank.

This kind of tank was primarily used on fairy space ships and submarines to ensure the survival of their occupants. The tank was filled with genetically-altered plant life that could produce the same amount of oxygen as an acre of trees within its life-span. The plant life inside could hold in water in a similar fashion to cacti and was kept alive using grow lamps on the walls of the tank. The plant would absorb the carbon dioxide and breathe out oxygen for the inhabitants, relieving the need for restocking until the plant died. And if it did, a back-up tank with over two hours' worth of air would kick in until the plant was replaced.

Wing Commander Vinyáya placed her hand on another flux metal scanner attached to a titanium door that separated the cube from the access tunnel made entirely of glass and steel.

Opal sat there writing out another letter and was surrounded by seahorse figurines fashioned from chewed cardboard. Two of them appeared to be broken. One had lost a tail and the other had been decapitated.

Opal's appearance had changed slightly in her three years' imprisonment. The usual height of a fairy was just over three metres, but Opal had been under that height when she was arrested. But thanks to the artificial pituitary gland containing human growth hormone she had had surgically placed in her head three years ago, Opal was now almost three foot four inches tall. Which was quite a towering height for a fairy, and even more so for a pixie.

Her dress attire had changed too. Instead of the traditional stylish and expensive catsuit the pixie usually wore, she had on a blue jumpsuit with a serial number on the back. The standard prison uniform for Atlantean inmates.

'Ah Wing Commander Vinyáya. Have you finally seen the truth of my words?' said Opal in a sweet, innocent little girl voice.

'Stuff it, Koboi!' snapped Vinyáya.

'Oh, my dear Wing Commander. Are you still upset because I took away your precious Commander Root?'

Vinyáya kept her cool, but Holly noticed that her fists were kept clenched very tightly after this. She was similar, but she was squeezing the gun butt of her Neutrino 3000 rather than her fist.

'Just... Get up and come with me,' said Vinyáya in a voice of strained calm. 'I'm sure the exercise will do you some good.'

'What do you mean by that?' said Opal, looking genuinely concerned.

'Well, look at you. Your skin's not as smooth as it used to be and your lips look pretty dry. And, oh, I think I might actually see a few wrinkles coming up. The centuries are catching up with you, Opal dear,' said Vinyáya, patting Opal playfully on the cheek.

This had Opal rushing over to the glass that surrounded them to check her reflection and see if this was true. Holly swallowed a smile at the sight. Good old Vinyáya. Always hit them right where it hurt.

They walked out of the holding facility where they drove in an armoured MagnaCar to the nearest shuttleport and took an LEP shuttle that would take them straight to Haven.

It was a really agonising trip. Opal kept on talking all the way through it about her marvelous inventions and how the efforts of Holly and Artemis Fowl were so feeble that only luck could have allowed them to succeed.

'How they infiltrated Koboi Labs was all because of those stupid dwarfs I hired!' Opal ranted. 'I always knew that those two were not to be trusted, but dwarf help is so hard to get. As for the Zito Probe, that was all the fault of those accursed Brill brothers. They were such bumbling idiots. As for Fowl, he is no genius! He is but a mere Mud Boy who spends too much time with those ancient Mud Man computers. I have analysed over everything in my plans and none of the mistakes that caused them to fail were my fault! It was all because of some idiot with dumb luck on their side. My brilliance and beauty is unmatched and will remain unmatched until after I am gone and I have revolutionised everything on and under the planet.'

It occurred to Holly then that Opal must have been thinking about all these factors during her three years in prison. This pixie was losing her mind to obsession.

Once they arrived in Haven City, they took another armoured MagnaCar to Police Plaza where the Operations' booth that controlled all the city's defences and networks was.

It was a long drive due to yet another traffic jam. Haven was the largest city under the world with roughly ten thousand fairies residing in it. Not very big by human standards, but by the People's it was the biggest city since the original Atlantis and traffic jams constantly clogged up the lanes.

Finally, after a long twenty minutes, they reached the steps at the front of Police Plaza, were an armed group of LEP officers were standing. Among them, Holly could spot Grub looking particularly stoic. Perhaps he was still a bit shaken from yesterday's events.

LEPretrieval One joined the group outside. Holly's job was finished from here on in. Guards were to be switched since Holly and the others hadn't been briefed on how to access Foaly's Ops' booth.

Opal was handed over to Grub, who took her firmly by the arm with his free hand, the other clutching his weapon.

Vinyáya received a message through her helmet and closed down her visor. Holly could see her expression through the glass. She was concerned over something as she listened to what the other person on the line was saying.

Finally, she cut the connection and whispered in Holly's ear.

'I'm needed back at headquarters.'

By headquarters Holly realised she must have meant Section 8, an elite branch of the LEP that used to track the activity of demons. But since the demons had returned, Section 8 had mainly been helping them rehabilitate and was now involving themselves in serious counter-actions involving demons, such as gangs of war-like race planning to head to the surface and hunt down Mud Men.

'Qwan's gone a bit hysterical because he can't find or contact Qweffor,' continued Vinyáya.

Qwan and Qweffor were two peaceful demon warlocks who had assisted in bringing the rest of the demons and their island of Hybras back from Limbo. They were both now living at Section 8 and were helping the latest demon warlock, N°1, with his magic studies.

'It's probably nothing, but better safe than sorry,' finished Vinyáya. 'I can give you a ride home if you like.'

Holly accepted and Vinyáya called for her stretch armoured vehicle waiting around the corner.

They got in and both women relieved themselves of their headgear before setlling in to relax before the rest of the day's stresses came up.

Holly was having difficulty though. Opal was devious, and there were currently two of them in the same timeline. Heaven knew what they'd be capable of if they so much as got in contact with each other.

Then the car's built-in communication system picked up talk on the LEP channel.

'Back up! We need back up!' came a desperate voice through the surround sound speakers. Blaster fire could be heard in the background with various soldiers barking order. If you closed your eyes, you'd swear you were in the middle of a war zone.

Holly and Vinyáya looked out through the rear window of the vehicle and could see Neutrinos being fired high up at the rooves of the buildings surrounding Police Plaza.

'We have goblins!' shouted the LEP officer a few blocks back into his communicator. 'They've set themselves up on the rooftops and in the alley ways. They must be after Koboi. We need reinforcements fast!'

'Driver!' yelled Vinyáya, while she and Holly put their helmets. 'Take us back! Now!'

As an added feature for government vehicles and collisions, all MagnaCars had been given an emergency function that would lift the vehicle five feet off the ground to either fly above traffic or avoid another MagnaCar crashing into them. In all civilian vehicles this would be done automatically through the use of sensors that would detect when a vehicle was coming too close too fast. But for emergency services, it could be done manually at the touch of button.

The driver pressed this button now and passed over the traffic at top speed, all the way back to Police Plaza.

When he finally landed, the officers on the scene were shooting at every rooftop in sight. But when Vinyáya and Holly got out, there was not a sign nor scale of a goblin.

One officer jumped on top of them and forced them to hide behind their vehicle.

'Keep your head down!' he ordered. 'They're got us surrounded!'

'Who? I don't see a goblin anywhere,' said Holly. raising her head above the car slightly.

The officer forced her down again by her helmet. This time, the visor closed over, and Holly could see the goblins. Then it dawned on her. There were no goblins. Someone had hacked into their helmets and was showing clips of them. By the look of the scene, it looked like the failed B'wa Kell uprising from four years ago.

Holly stood up and walked right into the middle of the supposed firefight, raising her hands up high.

'Everybody, cease fire!' she commanded. 'Take off your helmets. There are no goblins. It's all a trick!'

Everyone pulled off their headgear while still covered just in case, but then looked about at where their goblin enemies had been seconds ago.

'A trick?' said one officer. 'This was a stinkin trick!?'

'Yes. Most probably thought up by Koboi to spring her future self. While you were distracted by the goblins, Opal would be wide open. Where is he?'

'With Captain Kelp,' said another officer, and pointed to Grub.

He was lying on the ground with Opal in his arms. She must have been hit in a crossfire. But all LEP weapons were non-lethal, so nothing to worry about.

'Fight's over, Grub. Better wake up Koboi so she can sort out this mess,' said Holly.

Grub just lay there, haunched over Opal, his breathing shallow. 'I didn't mean to do it!' he blubbed. 'It was an accident. She got in the way of my fire.'

Holly pulled off her glove and felt Opal's ulnar artery in her wrist, applying gentle pressure. No good. She tried the carotid on her neck, but still could not find a pulse.

Holly looked away from Opal's lifeless body, mystified. All the LEP had were stunning weapons. But pixies brains were delicate. Perhaps if they were shot in the right place on the skull, it could resort to total system failure and immediate death.

'I shot her in the back of the head,' said Grub through sobs, confirming what Holly thought. 'It was an accident,' he repeated.

'Someone, take Captain Kelp inside,' ordered Vinyáya. 'Then bring back a medical examiner and full CSI team. Internal Affairs too. Tell them it is a homicide investigation.' She then turned to the patrol surrounding her. 'Listen, everyone. We've got a... crime scene on our hands involving a uniform, and I want it done by the book. Seal off the area. Check in all weapons to IA when they get here.'

Suddenly, everyone felt rain upon their heads. Strange when you're underground in a cave. It was really a complex sprinkler system currently set on 'light shower.' It was used to give the plants placed in Haven and the wildlife nourishment, but as of today, at this very moment, it seemed as if it was reflecting Grub's mood.

The sprinkler system had been ordered to shut down for the moment so it didn't wash away any forensic evidence. Everyone had gathered inside Police Plaza, Internal Affairs running inquiries by everyone.

Holly was stuck sat down, not being allowed to go home until IA had finished doing their work. She sadly watched Grub being questioned fervently. He hadn't even looked anyone in the eye since it happened.

Vinyáya sat beside her, her statement already filled.

'This week has been getting worse and worse,' said Vinyáya. 'The city's in a panic, tommorow's news will read the death of our only hope, a criminal who once tried to destroy this city. I think the only option left to us now is to contact your friend.'

Holly suddenly perked up, semi-consciousness of what was going on. 'You mean Artemis? He'll be thrilled to hear that. The People in need of his help again. He might not be so cocky when he hears Opal died like she did. Maybe he'll finally learn the smart ones aren't always invincible. I still can't believe it,' she declared. 'I mean, what must the odds have been.'

Vinyáya could only shrug. 'Some things just come out strange.'

They were all allowed to be let back home then, and Holly left Vinyáya sitting at the chair, waiting to speak to Commander Trouble Kelp.

Holly watched Trouble on the phone, hearing the voice of an elderly woman, probably his mother, and thought of her reaction.

'The Commander's ear is gonna be sore for a week,' she silently said to herself, then walked outside in pursuit of Grub.

HAVEN MORTUARY

Next to Police Plaza was the Haven Mortuary, the morgue used to house the dead of the city. The medical examiner on duty performed a routine check of his CT scanner, which could X-ray a corpse and produce a three-dimensional image to establish what a victim had died from.

In human circles and the olden days of the People, such a thing would be accomplished by autopsy, but fairy law had deemed it illegal since the invention of the CT scan.

The examiner, a warlock who didn't have a bone that didn't crack when moved, placed the body of Opal Koboi on the stretcher leading into the machine. He pushed a button and it retracted, pulling her body inside.

Two minutes later, it's job was done, and a 3D picture rotated on the machine's monitor. The examiner immediately noticed something was wrong, but then he got shot in the back from a Neutrino and he didn't have to worry about it anymore.

In the doorway was Captain Grub Kelp, who had managed to sneak through the alleys to avoid anyone following him.

Grub took a quick look at the X-ray out of curiousity, and saw the two anomalies covering Opal's neck and wrists, then moved over to her body and pressed a button on the controls, moving the stretcher out.

'Wakey, wakey, dearie,' he said in a voice far more sophisticated high-pitched than his usual one.

Opal Koboi's eyes fluttered open, awakened from her fake sleep. She tore off the bandages that blended to the perfect colour of her skin from her neck and wrists, right where the major veins were so officers could take a pulse. With the Nu-skin bandages blocking feeling to the vein, no one would could register a pulse, allowing them to think her dead.

Grub helped her down off the stretcher graciously.

'You have no idea how horrific it is to live like a subordinate,' said Grub.

'Oh, believe me,' said Opal like she was recounting the most horrofic experience in the world. 'I know it better than you do.'

Sparks cocooned Grub's body for a moment, then were swept away like a heavy summer breeze tugging at a dandelion's parachutes.

Where Captain Grub Kelp once stood was the past version of Opal Koboi, evading the fairy police and now helping spring her future self out of jail.

'We have to get out of here quickly,' she said. 'Our escape vehicle is right outside.'

The pair swiftly exited to the past Opal's modified taxi to make their escape.

The past Opal courteously opened the back door for her future self.

'Age before beauty,' she said.

Opal frowned. Was she really like that? Never mind. After all, it was justified.

Unbeknowst to the twin pair of pixies, the medical examiner was not in fact unconscious. The past Opal had forgotten to change the setting on her Neutrino so that when he was shot, he was only out for thirty seconds. He got up off the floor and pressed the emergency button on the wall.

CHAPTER 4: BACK TO THE PAST, OFF TO THE FUTURE
WAREHOUSE DISTRICT, HAVEN

Haven's Warehouse District was filled with large storage buildings where goods were kept. There was not a house in sight for five miles, and was usually were criminals went to conduct secret meetings in the only blind spot from the surrounding twenty cameras.

The past Opal's taxi slowed down as it approached one of the buildings.

'What are we slowing down for!?' said the present Opal furiously. 'The LEP are probably using the tracker in my arm to pin our location right now! We should be moving as fast as possible!'

All criminals were surgically fitted with subcutaneous seeker-sleepers in their skulls, or the arm in the case of pixies. The subcutaneous seeker-sleepers could both track the criminal's whereabouts and render them unconscious if the LEP realised they were involved in any illegal activity.

'Relax,' said the past Opal. 'This taxi's lead-lined. The lead stops the signals from getting through. You'll only be in danger as soon as I open the door.'

'I really do think of everything, don't I?'

The past Opal pulled up the taxi to an abandoned warehouse with a sign on top. On the sign was a male pixie with a bushy beard and moustache in a sailor's uniform with a wide smile holding a mackerel. Right beside his head in fading yellow were the words "Sturge's Fish".

'Oh, old uncle Sturge's place!' said the past Opal, surprised.

Sturge N. Koboi had previously been the owner of a major fish company. Pixies loved fish. And they especially loved protected shellfish such as lobster. Sturge had been caught smuggling illegal fish only ten years ago and was now serving time in prison. But Sturge had rented out the warehouse for one hundred years in cash, so the lessor was reluctant to rent it to somebody else in case Sturge sued him for every penny he was worth while still in the cooler. So the warehouse was left with nothing occupying it apart from swear toads and rotting fish.

The past and present Opals hurried into the warehouse. It was a dark and damp place, filled with the smell of moldy fish and was as quiet as the grave. Apart from the occasional profanity issued by a swear toad. The leaking fish tanks and broken floorboards added to the seedy appearance of the place. The only light came from the smashed windows and a glow cube on a nearby work table. It also had on it a flower pot filled with earth, a medi-kit and a plexiglass sphere also filled with earth.

The past Opal quickly removed her stolen LEP uniform, revealing a one-piece swimming costume, and threw it on to the table. This was to ease the difficulty of time-travelling. Clothes, and anything else the time-traveller was wearing, could meld with their body in the time-stream and would be stuck with it forever. Better to travel light than end up stuck in the same clothes for all eternity. Opal would be a walking fashion disaster for the rest of her life. How was that for a queen of the world to live?

When she was done, the past Opal picked up the plexiglass sphere filled with earth on the table and passed it to her future-self.

'This sphere has an acorn inside it,' explained the past Opal. 'You can barely see it, but it's in there. I robbed it from Holly Short along with her LEP gear. I can only guess that this is to keep the acorns fresh so you can complete the Ritual at a later date, and a genius like me is hardly likely to be wrong.'

Fairies were bound to certain laws and rituals that were written in their Bible known simply as the Book of the People. One of these rituals allows fairies to replenish their magic by picking an acorn from an ancient oak tree and burying it far away.

'There's no time for the Ritual now, so you'll have to later bury the acorn,' said Opal the younger.

The present Opal smashed the plexiglass sphere against the worktop and picked up the acorn from the small pile of earth before placing it in her pocket.

'There. Now, on to our escape plan,' said the past Opal.

She walked over to a metal barrel with an oxygen tube sticking out of the side. Opal opened up the lid to reveal a pair of long horns that looked like they could easily gut a pig. Attached to the horns was a muscled creature with skin the colour of moon-dust and a head like a gargoyle lying in a thick liquid the present Opal recognised as animal fat.

Animal fat enchanted with hexes was an ancient way of suppressing a fairy's magic, making it much easier to imprison them. Humans had used this method millenia ago to capture members of the People. This trick was quickly adapted by ancient fairy police forces as a last resort to contain dangerous criminals, but it was soon deemed too cruel to both animal and fairy alike and was outlawed.

'Allow me to introduce you to Qweffor,' said the past Opal. 'He is a former apprentice of Qwan himself, but has since completed his training and is now a fully fledged demon warlock. I ran into him on purpose at a speed-dating event and used my powers to mesmerize him. I can have complete control over him within a twenty metre radius. Even with solid objects acting as barricades. Now, it is time to put him to use.'

The past Opal then summoned her magic and in a voice as beautiful as the stars in a clear night sky, gave Qweffor his orders.

' Step out of the barrel, Qweffor, and stand over there, ' said the past Opal in a purely irresistible voice.

Qweffor then zombie-walked over to the spot Opal had indicated, trailing animal fat in his wake. Above the spot was a large tank of water the past Opal had prepared. She pulled a rope attached to a small hatch on the tank, and two gallons of water fell from it, completely washing away the fat from Qweffor. She then took a syringe gun from the medi-kit on the table and injected what looked like water into the demon's arm.

'Spring water from the fairy well sixty metres below the ring of Tara,' explained the past Opal. 'It will counteract the fat and the hexes and have his magic up and running again in no time.'

Within seconds of saying it, blue sparks came erupting through Qweffor's body, driving out the last remains of the hex stirred into the fat.

'Perfect,' said the past Opal. 'Just one more use of the mesmer and we'll both be back in the past, ready to foil the LEP's attack against us.'

'About that...' said the present Opal, 'I do not wish to return to the past.'

The past Opal's face was one mixed of fury and confusion. 'What? I've been planning this for three months! I've been working out every little detail since I first found out you- I was imprisoned.'

'Calm down. It is a minor alteration. Instead of us both going into the past, you will return to your time, and I shall go to the future.'

'Excuse me?!' said the past Opal in a hysterical voice.

'There is no time for argument. The LEP know we are here and will no doubt be banging down that door any second. You have learned about everything Artemis Fowl and the LEP did to stop my plan. So you must return to the past and I must go to the year 14,016. Trust me. I know what I'm doing.'

The past Opal let out an aggravated groan before saying 'Fine!' in a most irritated manner. 'I'll send you to the-'

'Opal Kobois,' said an amplified voice from outside. 'This is Commander Trouble Kelp of the LEP. We have the warehouse surrounded and every exit covered. Come out with your hands up in the next twenty seconds or we will enter the premises and take you in by force.'

Outside the warehouse, roughly eighty LEP officers were armed with Neutrinos and buzz batons in body-armour were ready to kick down the door to the place and go in all guns blazing, but the past Opal had powers that could fry them like flies in a bug zapper, so they had to be cautious.

'D'Arvit!' swore the two Opals simultaneously.

'Quickly!' said the past Opal to her future counterpart. 'Get in position!'

The present Opal stood in front of Qweffor. Her younger version giving her instructions.

'Just concentrate on the time and place you want to go and the time-tunnel will do the rest. Don't worry. Now that you have your powers back, it should be an easy matter.'

The present Opal nodded, not trusting herself to speak. After all, genius like that was bound to catch on eventually.

Qweffor's eyes closed and power crackled across his talons and horns in the shape of cyan lightning bolts while his power surged. When his eyes opened, they were pure crimson. His power was ready for the time-travelling process.

Because of the mesmer, Qweffor had virtually no hold over his magic and the past Opal, even with her advanced magic, had never handled power like this before and volts of electricity sparked off in various directions.

Outside, the LEP watched this spectacle in awe, unsure what was going on and how to plan their next move.

This was perfect for the two Opals. It gave them the time they need to travel to the past and future.

The past Opal then focused for all she was worth (in her opinion) and twin beams of scarlet energy shot out from Qweffor's eyes at the present Opal, sending her into the future. Where the pixie had once been was a ghost image of herself which lasted for barely a second before flying away into the surrounding air.

The past Opal took up her future self's position and readied herself. This was where things went incredibly bad for her.

Black canisters roughly the size of spray paint cans then came rushing through the already broken windows, and crashing into the ones still intact. These canisters were sonix grenades that generated sound waves that disoriented anyone within a twenty foot radius. This was generally used in hostage situations when someone was holding another fairy under their control using the mesmer so they would do harm to themselves, or worse. The grenades would disrupt a fairy's concentration and thus either allow the hostage to regain their senses and run for it or give the authorities the chance to slap a pair of handcuffs on the perp.

Opal collapsed to the ground, her ear drums aching from the pain of being on the edge of rupturing.

Qweffor blinked away the last traces of the mesmer, completely in control of himself. He summoned a wall of magic in his ear lobes to protect the drums. Then he saw Opal and he knew what he had to do, as Qwan had been instructed to by the LEP not long ago.

He grabbed the tiny pixie by the shoulders with his powerful arms and gazed into her eyes. Twin beams of cardinal magic erupted from his eyeballs and laced their way through Opal's eye sockets just as the LEP came charging in.

Qweffor was wiping the past Opal's memory of the past few months so that she would remember nothing of her trip to the future. When he was finished, a flash of light from his eyes sent her back to her proper time with only a passing ghost image to show where she'd stood.

With his free will restored and job done, Qweffor fainted from exhaustion and was soon making more noise than a legion of chainsaws with his snores.

CHAPTER 5: FOWL IS AT PLAY
POLICE PLAZA, WAITING ROOM ONE, OUTSIDE THE COUNCIL CHAMBERS

It had been two days since the present Opal Koboi's escape and the city of Haven was running smoothly again, though all the authorities were thoroughly panicked now that Public Enemy Number One was back on the loose.

Grub Kelp had been found stuffed in a closet in Police Plaza and revealed that the past Opal had come up to him disguised as Holly Short and ordered him to go into the closet using the mesmer. Opal had then hacked into the identification software installed in the suit she'd stolen from Holly and used a hair from Grub to fool the DNA scanners to get into Police Plaza after she'd stolen Grub's own LEP gear once he was trapped, dressed up in it and then used her shape-shifting powers to give herself Grub's features and appearance after pulling a couple of hairs out. No one would know any the wiser.

Now they knew how the past Opal had got in they could shut down the alert and get things running normally. Security had been beefed up now that hair strands had been deemed too easy to steal and were now running all DNA tests by surliva swab.

On the bright side, Qweffor had woken up late last night and had given a detailed explanation to the agents at Section 8 guarding him, and was due to repeat his tale before the Council today so a Retrieval operation could be planned.

Holly Short currently sat outside the Council Chambers with her commanding officer, waiting to be admmitted. She'd been asked in because of her experience with Opal so she could give an opinion, and she was hoping to get in on bringing her back.

Holly's superior, Commander Kelp, famous for choosing the name 'Trouble' at his graduation ceremony, stood stiffly next to the bench Holly was sitting at. He'd been promoted to commander in the three years Holly had been away. Some said he was channelling the spirit of Julius Root and there was currently an office pool going on how long it would take before his face started going scarlet and he began having temper tantrums.

'Feeling OK, Captain?' he asked. This was a rare moment of comfort for him these days. He'd been a good friend to Holly over the years, but he'd become much more stiff in how he treated her and his comrades now that he was their commanding superior.

'Yeah. Just a little nervous,' she said. 'It's like being on trial in there, and not just because of the set-up.'

'Well, keep your chin up and your back straight going in there,' Trouble ordered. 'Show 'em you're confident in yourself or you'll never get on the mission. And a recon officer not being part of a retrieval operation is a slap in the face to your badge.'

'Yessir. Will do, sir.'

A large gnome in a blue uniform then came through the large false wooden entrance to the Council Chambers.

'Commander Kelp. Captain Short. The Council will see you now,' he said. 'And I must remind you that once inside, everything you hear becomes confidential. Not a word can leave this room.'

The two elves nodded.

Before going in, Commander Kelp took on a more pleasant and kindly expression and turned to his officer.

'Don't worry, Holly,' he said, sounding much more like a friend than a commander. 'You'll get your chance to get even. How can they refuse you after all the experience you've had with Koboi?'

Holly gave her thanks with a confident look in the eye and a firm nod. The two then entered the Council Chambers side-by-side.

The chambers were similar to a courtroom in terms of furniture and arrangement, with the chairman at a large stand on his own and all the other members sitting off to the left on raised seats like a jury, whilst non-Council members sat at one of the two tables in view of them all. There were also six rows of seats behind these tables for seating at larger conferences.

Chairman Cahartez sat at the stand, his official conical hat perched on his head. He pushed a button on the stand and buzzed for attention. Hammers weren't used anymore. Except for the last Christmas party when Cahartez had decided to come as a nutcracker. Unfortunately, few fairies celebrated Christmas and even fewer knew much about it, so Cahartez just used his imagination and brought with him a large mallet for work. The stand had needed mending twice that day.

'Please be seated,' said Cahartez, indicating towards one of the two tables.

The two officers took up their chairs and made eye contact as much as possible with their superiors. Holly spotted Vinyáya with her silver hair among them, and the wing commander risked an encouraging wink.

A female official in a dark grey suit walked up to the table and activated a digital voice recorder on it.

'You are Captain Holly Short of the Lower Elements Police Reconaissince unit. Correct?'

'Yes I am, miss.'

'And you are Commander Trubbadias Jupard Kelp of the of the Lower Elements Police Reconaissince unit. Correct?'

Trouble blushed slightly. His real name was rarely brought up, and whenever it was it received a fit of giggles from his fellow officers before Trouble shot them a threatening glare.

'Yes I am,' he said.

'Do you both swear on the Book of the People that you shall tell no lie within these walls?'

'I do,' they both said simultaneously.

The official returned to her seat and Chairman Cahartez took over from her.

'Before action can be taken to deal with Opal Koboi, we must determine our course. We have to know everything that went on, so we must ask you to be present while our main witness repeats his account, Commander Kelp. It is most vital that you listen too, Captain Short. You might be able to shed some light on the matter considering your experience with Miss Koboi.'

Cahartez then looked at Vinyáya and gave a single nod. The wing commander then addressed the gnome that had fetched Holly and Trouble.

'Mr. Gabole, please bring in the trio of demons waiting outside.'

Gabole then hurried to the door leading to Waiting Room Two and brought with him three gargoyle-like creatures. One was siginifacntly larger than the others but showed respect towards the eldest of the group while ruffling the bald head of the smallest creature. These three were Qweffor, Qwan and Nº1, the last three remaining demon warlocks in existance.

Qweffor was larger because of his warped body. Demons usually reached maturity from being covered in a thick slime that caused them to reach adulthood or 'warp' within several hours. This didn't apply to warlocks as warping was brought on bloodlust and they were peaceful creatures, but Qweffor had been trapped inside the body of a warped demon called Abbot when he tried to kill a group of demon warlocks trying to remove their island from Earth and into Limbo. Qweffor had been stuck in the back Abbot's mind for years, a very dull place to say the least. Finally, Qweffor was freed from Abbot's control and the demon's mind had been transferred to the body of a ginny pig. The scientists studying the strange specimen often threw in toy swords or axes when solving quantum therums became a bit too dull for their taste and had a good giggle.

Qweffor approached the speaker's stand next to Chairman Cahartez, Qwan and Nº1 giving him encouraging looks as he went along. Finally, he walked in through the side-entrance and sat down.

The female official walked up to him and activated the button-sized recorder on the stand.

'You are Qweffor? Demon warlock and former apprentice to Qwan?' she asked.

'Yes, I am.'

'Could you repeat the account you gave yesterday night to Section Eight personnel while at Haven Clinic?'

'Certainly, miss,' said Qweffor, and let out a little cough before reciting his tale. 'Three days ago, I went to a speed-dating event in Downtown Haven at a restaurant called Milany's. I put the charm on the first six women I talked with, flexing the muscles and all that, hoping that one might like me. After the sixth girl, this sprite sat down opposite me and we started to get along pretty well. I talked about my life as a demon warlock, the things I'd seen as a time traveller. Mostly me, really. Once the speed-dating was over, it turned out we were matched up and we went out for a night together the following evening at a disco. It was set in the human seventies and I had to wear this really itchy alfro. Anyway, once the night was over and we left the club, she tried to kiss me, but at the last second, as my guard was down, she used the mesmer on me and I was completely under her control. Pity, really,' he added, a little embarrassed. 'I rather thought we hit it off.'

'Then what happened, Mister Qweffor?' asked Cahartez, eager for the interview to be over and the Retrieval operation underway.

'She took me to the Warehouse District and ordered me to get into a barrel full of animal fat. None of my magic was working at all, but hers was. I was still under her control despite the lack of eye contact. Then, two days later, she ordered me out of the barrel and cleaned off the fat before giving me some sort of booster to get my magic back up and running. I've been at the back of a demon's head for years. By then, I'd retreated into a part of my mind that was resistant and aware while my body followed her commands using an ancient warlock spell. It's kind of like state you're in during a cleansing coma,' explained Qweffor, 'except you're awake and mesmerized. So, she ordered me to send Opal, our Opal, not the past one, thousands of years into the future. Then, after I'd done that, she ordered me to send her, the past Opal, back to her own time. At the last second, just as she was about to go back in the time tunnel, she released me from her grip. I grabbed her by the shoulders and did a blanket mind-wipe of the past three months and put a block on her powers.'

'A block?' asked Cahartez. 'Could you please explain what you mean by "block?"'

'Of course. A block is an ancient spell. Only demon magic can produce it. It stops certain magical powers from being used. We use it when apprentice demon warlocks lose control of their magic and we have to stop them for wrecking everything. Opal's new powers, or old, should I say, are blocked from her control. The only way to bring them back under her control would be to submit her to a strong boost of magic.'

'Like what, exactly?' asked Holly. Technically, she shouldn't have spoken unless given permission, but she wanted to know everything that could go wrong and everyone was too busy being worried about the situation to give a hoot.

'Something extremely powerful. Five times the power of the Ritual. Like if demon magic were transferred into her system,' said Qweffor.

With the facts presented, Cahartez adjusted his hat as he thought, deciding on what action the Council should take.

'This situation is a desperate one,' he said, frankly. 'Koboi is a great risk to the people and must be located. I am giving you permission, Commander Kelp, to put together a crack team of your best men to find her.'

'But how, sir? We have no idea how to track her,' said Trouble.

Wing Commander Vinyáya then coughed before speaking up. 'We have that covered. Computer, activate monitor 002. Bring up link Atlantis Fairy Troll Sprite-001.'

A section of the wall behind Cahartez slid back to reveal three plasma screen monitors, all thirty by thirty inches.

On the middle one appeared a boy with the face worthy of Dracula's son sitting at a desk, and a bald, aged head twice the size of the boy's crammed next to him, trying desperately to get into the camera's view and not knock his charge off his seat at the same time.

Holly smiled. Artemis and Butler. Vinyáya had brought in the best people for the job.

At the sight of the two Mud Men, many of the Councilors went into silence, too stunned at the sight of two of the humans to speak.

'I have brought in Artemis Fowl II to assist us,' said Vinyáya, as if the boy's name and face weren't known by everyone in the room.

Vinyáya's introduction snapped the Council out of its stupor and they began barking out protests like wild dogs.

Artemis coughed several times to get everyone's attention while Cahartez vainly pressed his buzzer for order. It wasn't until Butler cleared his throat and a sound like cannon fire came through the surround sound speakers, nearly deafening everyone, including the young boy sitting right beside him, that they were under control again.

Artemis rubbed the insides of his ears a little. 'Do give me the opportunity to cover my ears the next time you do that, Butler,' he said.

Butler merely moved off screen with an apologetic look on his face. The real apologies could be saved for later.

'Why have you brought a human into this?' protested one councilor, a gnome with a corkscrew goatee and enough rings to make his fingers look like they were made of solid gold. 'And of all humans, this human?'

The protests roared up again, but this time, Cahartez's buzzer managed to get them to settle down.

With silence restored, Vinyáya stood up so she could be seen by everyone.

'I know Artemis has been an enemy to us in the past and almost compromised fairy safety, but more often he's saved us from terror. He's a genius and has had experience with Opal Koboi before. Plus, he has a solution ready and waiting on how to capture Koboi.'

All protests were forgotten, and all eyes were fixed on the monitor with Artemis's face on it. Could it be true? Could this human prodigy have the answer to one of the greatest problems in fairy history?

Artemis cleared his throat for attention and assumed his usual manner. Arrogant and annoyingly clever.

'Ladies and gentleman, before Opal's escape, I anticipated that if her past self did indeed free her, they would travel through time to the past to stop Opal's original plan of the B'wa Kell rebellion and then assuming power. But I was only partially right. On the day Foaly was rendered comatose, he told me his team had cracked the encryption on Opal's diary. I was given some of the files within it for my tracker project. During this time, Foaly told me of Opal's attempt to find out how her own plans would progress by illegally sending a probe to the future. I have been given access to all the information on her diary and I managed to find out that while the probe landed off course by a dozen millennia, it did return. It had recorded three days worth of information. The video file wasn't in the diary, however, but the exact date it landed and departed was. So we now know what year Opal is in. She wouldn't go into the future without knowing what she was getting in to. That's like going into the world's biggest maze without directions.'

'While that is a very good start,' said Cahartez, 'it still does not give us her exact location. And if were to send agents out into every single day of that year to find Opal, the results could be catastrophic. So many journies through the time tunnel could have effects we couldn't even begin to imagine. Nothing like that has ever been attempted before.'

'True,' admitted Artemis, 'but I can get us Opal's exact location.'

'How?' asked Holly and Cahartez in almost perfect unison.

'The seeker sleeper in her arm,' said Artemis. 'Opal will want to be cautious. She's only got three days' worth of information to use. Three days' worth of absolute fact. She would stick to one of these days to avoid getting involved in some dangerous incident. She said in her diary that the planet was in a state of war at the moment. The last thing she would want to happen to herself would be to get killed or captured by whoever's fighting in this war. I propose our demon warlock friends send a probe to the start of these three days that can detect the seeker sleeper escorted by an LEP officer.'

'We would be happy to do that,' spoke up Qwan, elder of the demon warlocks. His new apprentice Nº1 also looked eager to help. Qweffor, who was still sitting in the stand beside Cahartez, looked happy at this. It was a chance to redeem himself for what he had inadverdently caused.

'We wouldn't be able to get an exact location where she is on the planet, though,' said Artemis. 'For that we would need satellite support. But it would determine when she arrived in the future, and thus we send a team to when she is in the future and find her using Earth's satellites.'

'That is ridiculous,' piped up one council member. 'The humans will have had thousands of years to develop new technology. How do you know our current machines will be able to rig a satellite? That is, if they even use satellites anymore.'

'Opal's diary said that human technology has only risen by a few decades. It seems that humanity's ability to create has only gone as far as to improve what they already have and left it at that. No idea why. Perhaps due to a global recession that has lasted a significant time. The world could have fallen into chaos by an economic crisis and only recently has got back on its feet. I've been expecting such an orccurence to happen. So, we have the means, the opportunity, the resources and the brains to catch Opal. That is, if you'll allow me to be a part of this mission.'

'What concern is it of yours that Opal should be imprisoned?' asked Cahartez.

'She tortured my mother with a deathly illness, rendered my good friend, Foaly, comatose and murdered Commander Julius Root,' said Artemis. 'I owe her much sorrow, as do many others. The People have helped rid me of the demons of my life. No offence to you three of course,' nodded Artemis at the three demon warlocks. 'It only seems fair that I rid of a devil like Opal. And to stop the devil, you'll need someone on his level of cunning.'

Holly had to smile. Cunning as the devil. That was Artemis Fowl alright.

'For this mission, we will be venturing out into the unknown for three days, so we will need to take along some resources. I know in time travel you have to concentrate during the journey through time or else you will be lost forever, and thus it is better to keep what you're wearing or carrying simple or else it could meld itself on to you. But I have a remedy. I have studied magic long and hard and have made a machine using a similar method to your own time-stop towers.'

For centuries, fairy warlocks had been able to stop time around certain spaces or even across the whole planet. But since the humans had become so much more technologically advanced, the People had to stay ahead of the game. So Foaly had made the whole operation of a time-stop machine controlled by having elfin warlocks store their magic in lithium batteries that could stop time for eight hours. But elfin warlocks had been rendered obsolete since N°1 had arrived, and these batteries could now stop time for a whole day. The towers transmitted the magic like a net over a set area, completely dropping wherever they wanted out of the current time under the power was out, and then it returned back to Earth.

'It broadcasts a small dome of magic across a platform big enough for six or seven people,' continued Artemis, 'but we no longer have to think during the jump through time. Using a CT scan, I can have all my biological information stored on a computer and it concentrates on this image throughout a journey through time, so I no longer have to. This process can be done with anyone and anything by simply inputting the schematics of an object or person. In short, I have removed any risks of the time travel process and allowed us to take anything we need with us. We could send a full team with all the equipment they need into the future and catch Opal within three days. With the resources at their disposal, it would be simple.'

Cahartez stood up, dumbfounded, though also confused. This went for a fair few of the Council too, but they understood that last bit.

'Fowl, you may have just given us the answer to our prayers,' the chairman said. 'Now that we have a plan, we'll need the team. Fowl, I'll allow you to go along in case the machine fails and our team needs a way back to the present. I can't spare any demon warlocks, though.'

'I could simply take a battery with their magic then construct a new machine. The parts will be difficult to get, but with fairy aid, certainly not impossible. And if I'm going on this mission, Butler will want to come too. He would be more than a great asset. He's tracked criminals with some of the greatest underworld connections in human circles. Opal Koboi all on her own shouldn't prove a problem. Plus he'd be helpful in a combat situation if she plans to join one of these warring factions for asylum. No one would pass up the opportunity of her engineering skill.'

'Excellent back-up strategy. Foaly was working on a bigger shuttle model that could house twelve fairies, rations and weaponry. I think you could use it for your mission, if this platform can take the shuttle.'

'Oh, don't worry. I've got the perfect solution for that.'

'Good. Now, we will need someone experienced with Koboi. Captain Short.' Holly quickly rose up at her name.

'Yes, sir?' she said.

'You're on board. Your record with Opal and your Recon missions speaks for itself, but this is Retrieval. And this'll be your first time trying out this new game, but the rules aren't much different, so expect the usual success from you. Do I make myself clear?'

'Yessir.'

'Good. Now, who else in the LEP has had experience with Opal.'

'No one, sir,' said Commander Kelp. 'The only other people were Commander Root and Foaly, sir.'

'There are other fairies, though, sir,' said Holly. 'Mulch Diggums has been involved with all of Koboi's major expliots, and has been a vital part in our successes.'

'I don't like this,' said the councilor with the goatee, which sprung a little as he played with it. 'We are relying too much on outside help.'

'True,' admitted Cahartez, 'but not help we haven't relied on before. Diggums is one half of the Diggums and Day: Private Investigators group, a PI and part-time bounty hunting business we've called before because of their reputation. They've caught fifteen per cent of Haven's criminals since they opened business. They were even hired to track down the Koboi, the past version, so technically we still have a contract with them.'

Artemis smiled. 'Smart thinking. Mulch and Mister Day are just the people I had hoped you'd think of.'

'Then, it seems like everything is ready. Captain Short, contact Diggums and Day immediately and get them down here. Get yourself ready for departure until they get here. Wing Commander Vinyáya, arrange for these demons to power up the necessary batteries. Commander Kelp, get everything organised. Get these three fairies a visa, get that new shuttle ready for launch and load it up with everything they'll need. Ladies and gentlemen, this mission is dismissed until further notice,' said the chairman and buzzed them away.

CHAPTER 6: A DIGGER AND A DRIVER
OUTER HAVEN, ABANDONED TUNNEL COMPLEX

You've heard the names, now meet the people who match them.

Mulch Diggums and Doodah Day where both reformed crooks now making their way in life legitimately while still getting to use their old criminal methods. Mulch was a burglar who had once broken into the Bank of England on a dare and Doodah Day was an accomplished driver of every type of vehicle, formerly a professional smuggler dealing mainly in transporting fish.

The business used to be just Mulch and Holly, but then she went back to working with the LEP and Doodah filled in her place and had been working with Mulch for nearly three years now.

They'd been occupied with tracking Opal Koboi down along with the LEP and anybody else desperate for the reward money they'd get for bringing her in, but five days ago they'd been hired by the Frond family, the descendants of first ever king of the fairies.

The second latest in the line, Corporal Lili Frond informed them that a gangster called Groma with a bounty on his head almost as big as Koboi's had kidnapped her little sister, Prudence.

Groma was infamous in underworld circles. He was a cross between a pixie and a goblin, which was odd since pixies were smart and the average goblin had a smaller brain than an ant, though with powers over fire and the surprising ability to speak.

Groma, being a fusion of his respective parents' species, had pixie brains and the look and powers of a goblin, making him an incredibly dangerous foe. Goblins naturally lived a life of crime, and Groma wasn't any different, actually becoming something of a crime boss.

The pair of bounty hunters couldn't get any police aid. Lili told them if the LEP were involved, then the girl was a goner, and that's why she needed outside help.

Her father had come up with the idea, as Lili herself was none too clever, and was willing to pay handsomely for his daughter's safe return as long as it was kept quiet to avoid public embarrassment at an LEP officer needing outside help, even willing to let them keep the bounty on Groma if he was captured.

Mulch and Doodah could get two pay-outs for finishing one job, and the total would be a king's ransom. They pulled out all the strings to get this job done, calling in owed favours and interrogating their informants.

They didn't have any luck until they got to their prized informant, Groober the Tuba. He got his nickname after the highest ranking insult in dwarf circles, which was releasing recycled earth and wind in the direction of another person. Groober had little bowel control due to a lifetime of eating vole curry and no earth roughage for his insides. It had often got him into trouble with other dwarfs, but Mulch had often sweet talked whoever he accidentally insulted out of beating him to a pulp.

Even with these kind of favours backing him, Mulch still had to persuade Groober to give them the information they wanted.

The incontinent dwarf told them that Prudence Frond was being kept in Groma's hideout of an abandoned tunnel complex, not too far from the city. It had been a hive of illegal activity and mainly used for smuggling when it still had tunnels leading to the surface, but the LEP had sealed some of the larger ones to keep fairies from going out into the human world and getting caught on camera.

This was not good. The tunnels was where Groma kept his pet, a troll he fed his enemies to, and often those he'd abducted along the negotiators carrying the ransom money. Of course, the money would be relieved from them before they got eaten.

Fortunately, being ex-cons who had worked in the tunnels before, Mulch and Doodah knew the layout pretty well and began to think of a plan. Groma and his goons would be easy to deal with if everything went accordingly, but the troll was what worried them. The average troll was over twelve feet tall, but rumour said Groma's was somewhere between fifteen and twenty. Thankfully, one of Doodah's owed favours provided an answer and they had a solid plan at their disposal.

So now Mulch was lying in wait underground with a flesh-coloured microphone stuck to his neck and a speaker lodged in one ear in contact with Doodah.

You see, dwarfs had little in the way of magical power, and in any case, Mulch had had his magic taken from him when fairy law still allowed any fairy who went into a human dwelling without invitation to have their powers revoked. But Mulch did have his abilities granted to him through evolution like all his species. Dwarfs are diggers and most usually work down in mines searching for precious gems and metals.

These abilities unique to dwarfs are ingesting dirt through their mouths and ejecting it out the other end, drinking moisture through their pores in the case they were trapped by a cave-in and couldn't get to water with the added effect of his skin becoming a living suction cup and surliva that glowed and hardened when it came in contact with air. These abilities came in great use in the life of a professional burglar.

'Wheels to Pungent. Wheels to Pungent. Do you hear me? Over,' said a voice buzzing in Mulch's ear.

That was the problem with the outdated LEP gear they were using. The quality wasn't nearly as good since the ear piece was fifty years old, but still better than anything civilians were using.

'Pungent to Wheels, I hear you. And why do I always have to have the ridiculous code name? So far I've had Stinky, Dog-Breath, Flatulence, Fly Farm, Sewer Mouth and Goblin's Cologne.'

Doodah had to smile to himself. Annoying his partner gave him no end of satisfaction. And Mulch felt the exact same way, which was what made this job interesting. 'Because it's all true. And the Fly Farm one was a comment on your table manners. That shirt of yours is covered in so much food it attracts more flies than a manure truck. Hey! That should be your next code name. Walking Manure Truck!'

Mulch admired his friend's playful side, but wasn't about to concede defeat. 'Why don't we just call you Pram Man, since you're no bigger than a baby and spend all your time sitting in four wheels.'

'Not all the time. Last week I had to drive something with three wheels. Though it did start out with four, I'll admit.'

All this playful banter was to make time go by faster. Right now, Doodah was stationed with a pair of binoculars he bought on the black market that came with scopes, digital zoom, X-ray and heat sensors. The X-ray was the main reason it was on the black market, as it could see inside various facilities such as banks or inside LEP buildings with hidden weapon stashes.

Currently, everything was pretty ordinary except for the heat signature of a swear toad. Then a lone figure highlighted in pinks and reds showed up.

'Pungent, she's here,' Doodah told his partner. 'Get ready.'

Mulch did as he was told and dug himself to four metres below the exchange point, feeling for the vibration of conversation through the earth.

Up above, or as above as you can get underground near the Earth's core, Lili Frond walked into the network of tunnels as Groma had instructed her. She'd been told to go to the largest tunnel and heading straight. She finally reached a room filled with adjoining tunnels, some of which had been sealed off or mostly filled with earth, but still allowing enough room for excess heat from the planet's core to be released, otherwise the Earth would have shaken itself to pieces ages ago.

She went into the complex's centre and heard a 'psst' coming from a tunnel she'd just walked passed. In it was a goblin waving her to come to him. Lili did as she was told.

The goblin led her down a single long tunnel, going up a little until coming to a cavern. Groma was on a ledge, looking down at the stalactites and stalagmites. Lili noticed another tunnel behind these that sent her heart racing. It had a large entrance, and she could see a bone wedged between two rock structures. She might not have been the brightest in the bulb box, truth be told, she'd been rattling when you shook her for a while, but gut instinct told her the troll was kept there.

She swallowed her instant overwhelming fear. She was at least good at following orders. Though she'd lose her cool if things got out of control and pandemonium was at hand.

Slung across her should was an LEP equipment pack. It was similar to a backpack, but completely airtight, water-proof, fire-resistant and secured with a thumb-print scanner. If the pack identified you as a thief, it'd sent a shock through your hand in a joy buzzer style, giving anyone with long hair the appearance of a feather duster.

Groma turned to face her.

'You came,' he said in a very bad Italian accent. Groma had studied humans through their media due to their success when it came to crime and had fashioned himself an appearance based after Marlon Grando in The Godfather. He was still working on the accent though and the reptillian voice common to all goblins wasn't helping.

Lili put on a stiff upper lip. 'I've got your money. All of it. Now I want my sister.'

Groma turned to one of his comrades. 'Bring the girl.'

The goblin sulked for a moment at being asked to actually do work and stalked off.

Lili turned to him, frightened, but doing her best to hide it. 'Aren't you going to search me?'

'No. No bugs will work in this cave. One of those stalagmites down there is fake. It's really a jammer. And if any LEP showed up, I'd have picked up chatter. I stole one of their helmets and one of my boys is listening for anything right now.'

Doodah heard this from his perch in one of the tunnels higher up. Just as he and Mulch had figured. They'd be too focused on the high-tech communication devices to watch out for low-tech ones like walkie-talkies. Technically, these were illegal. But technically, Doodah and Mulch couldn't care less. It wasn't as if they hadn't broken the law before.

The goblin that had left quickly returned with a young girl wearing goth gear with a pink zig zag going through her hair. The girl was sixty, but by human standards, she was little more than a teenager.

She had on a better brave face than her sister. From what Mulch had heard underground, young Prudence Frond had annoyed the living daylights out of her guardian, who was now blabbing to his comrade a few metres off.

'A whole day I spent with that brat!' said the traumatised golbin. 'Kept on demanding hair stuff. Why'd she want that stuff? She got hair already!'

This was just the latest. Before now, Mulch had heard of at least one escape attempt, which were infuriating because they mainly came out of human movies that barely got one star from the critics.

Tying to knock out a goblin using a rock. Honestly. Any idiot knows a goblin's head is thicker than the standard rock, and in more ways than one to boot.

Lili let out a breath she'd been holding at seeing her younger sister. She had her arms crossed and was scowling at the world in general. She was perfectly fine.

'Open the bag then hand over the loot,' said Groma.

Lili placed her thumb on the print scanner and the latch on the bag unlocked. She placed it in-between her and Groma and the goblin/pixie hybrid picked up. He took out an eyepiece resembling a monacle and digitally enhanced a gold piece from the pack. His comparison to a photo on an online database proved it was genuine.

He smiled widely, breath of an old furnace spilling out between his teeth in excited pants. He'd pulled off his biggest ransom yet.

'You have it,' said Lili. 'So we'll go now.'

'I'm sorry,' said Groma. 'But I can't allow that. If I kidnap you here, I could double my earnings. I doubt your daddy would want the LEP to know both his precious daughters had been kidnapped. Unfortunately, I don't have much room here. So I'm afraid one of you is going to have to be treated as a waste of space and taken care of.'

Goblins covered various escape routes, all except for the ones that were secret and too high up to be reached.

'Bring the corporal forward,' said Groma.

Two goblins grabbed her by the arms, foolishly leaving their posts to grab her.

'NUMSKULLS!' roared Groma at his men. 'Idiots! Get that entrance covered now!'

The two who grabbed Lili bolted back to their posts.

'Not you two!' screamed Groma. He resented his goblin side of the family, especially since every one of them were brain-dead as zombies. 'Someone else do it! And keep hold of Miss LEP.'

'Yeah!' roared up Lili. 'I'm LEP. You're dancing with trolls here.'

'What an appropriate choice of phrase,' said Groma with a nasty and eager smile upon his face.

He turned towards the large cave at the other side of the room.

Lili might have been dumb, but she could see what was coming next. Fluttering her eyelashes wasn't going to help her in this situation. It was all down to their plan now.

Groma pulled out a remote from his jacket pocket and pushed its one and only button. The pressing of the button sent out a signal to a battery-powered speaker that sent out a high-pitched whine using Sonix technology, audible to only dogs and a certain monstrous fairy creature.

Disturbed by the noise, the being inside the cave walked out from its den, massive thuds sending out vibrations through the floor of earth and stone. It emerged from the shadow, twice the size of a normal man and ten times in weight. It had tusks jutting out from its jaws like hooks made of jagged rock, skin covered in untamable brown fur. Its face looked like nothing more than a skull with wrinkled flesh clinging to it, with red night eyes latched into the sockets below the dirty dreadlocks atop its head. The combined result of tigers, alligators, lions and every other fearsome creature known to man would not have stood a chance against a beast such as this. But then again, fairies were not commonly known to men.

'Tiny!' said Groma as if he'd just been greeted by a favourite pet dog.

His goons were shaking, holding up electric stun guns. They could not knock the troll unconscious, but they'd scare him and make him run back into his shelter if his fur got singed.

'Duddy missed you,' he said using his baby talk vocabulary. 'But he brought you a treat.'

The troll threw it head back and roared, the power of sound causing the fairies' very bones to shake in their bodies and their teeth scrape in their jaws.

'Bring his food,' yelled Groma. 'He's hungry.' The goblin/pixie hybrid thought acting psychopathic like this added an additional fear factor, and he was more than a little right.

Lili breathed deeply and thought.

What was it? Three coughs? Three swoons? Pretending to throw up?

Then she remembered. She breathed in deeply, releasing some air quickly before taking it in again, then taking one long breath. Then her head jerked forward three times.

'A-choo!' she said. 'A-choo! A-choo!'

'You wanna hankey?' asked a goblin.

Three sneezes. That's the signal! thought Doodah from his hiding place before giving the order aloud. 'Come in, Pungent! Now, Mulch, go! Ride like the wind that flows out your-'

'I get the picture!' said Mulch hurriedly. Even dwarfs didn't like talking about that specific subject if they could avoid it.

Suddenly, the ground beneath Groma and his cronies began to shake.

'W-what is this?' the crime boss asked no one in particular, but hoping for an answer all the same.

He got it as the earth was sucked out from underneath his feet, into the belly of Mulch Diggums and then out again. Soon, Groma and the thugs closest to him were up to their necks in recycled earth. Even if Groma could escape now, he'd never live down the humiliation.

'A dwarf!' yelled a particularly intelligent goblin. 'It's a stinkin' dwarf!'

'Yo' sure?' asked another, more on the average brain scale.

'Dunno. I could be wrong.'

As the mentally stimulating conversation (for them at least) progressed, Mulch ate dirt and buried them in his recyclings.

Soon goblins had their fire balls up and were blasting the earth randomly, not coming anywhere close to where Mulch was.

The flashing light and noise of the hysteria provoked Tiny, who roared as loud as he could and went straight for the easiest meal he could get his hands on: Lili and Prudence. Even trolls didn't want to eat goblins covered in earth.

Then a horn echoed through the complex as Doodah in a vehicle zoomed out from one of the upper tunnels and landed near Tiny.

He was driving something similar in body to a forklift truck, but shielded with bullet-resistant glass and armed with many grappling tools that could be manipulated from the driver's seat.

This was the latest in anti-trill technology, the Gripper. It weighed a ton but could move as fast as one hundred and fifty miles per hour with a clean engine.

Doodah floored the accelerator and the Gripper rushed towards Tiny and he manipulated the vehicle's controls, trying to secure the troll's arms, body and legs. Each grapple was fitted with a needle filled with tranquillizer to stun the creature, but the hard part was getting close enough to the troll.

It could easily pick up a car or two, but thanks to gravity manipulating technology, the Gripper could be made to weigh anything from one to five tonnes.

Tiny struggled with the machine, thrashing for all he was worth. Despite knowing they every protection had been taken with the vehicle, Doodah felt terrified, but did not freeze. If he did, he would have certainly been doomed.

Instead, he looked at the read-outs and assessed the situation, eventually settling on a course of action. The obvious one: Take out the troll.

With one hand manipulating the controls, Doodah pulled down a pair of goggles linked to a series of cameras on the front of the Gripper, then slipped his free hand into a v-glove, which allowed him to control one of the vehicle's arms as if it were his own.

He grabbed the troll by it's right wrist and applied the sedative needle, causing the limb to slacken a bit. Then he turned on the stomach and leg clamps and finally slipped his right hand into the other glove and grapsed the troll's only remaining limb.

The monstrous beast was falling deep into lullaby land now, and the only thing keeping it up was the Gripper. Doodah wiped the perspiration from his forehead and drove the Gripper and the troll into its cave dwelling, releasing Tiny to where he could do no harm then backed out. That particular troll wouldn't be awake for at least a couple of ohours.

Mulch had been busy. All of Groma's goons had ended up just like the crime boss's ransom plan: Soiled.

Lili and Prudence were still shaking, but they weren't beyond comprehension.

'Th-thank you,' said Lili.

'Yeah,' said Prudence. 'Real awesome.'

'We accept thanks in cash or checque, and the occasional celeboratory dinner,' said Mulch.

'We'll take gold, though,' said Doodah.

'I only have my Platinum,' said Lili.

Doodah scowled. Mulch just smiled behind his bushy Santa beard.

'Not a Gold Card. Gold as in actual gold. Your pop agreed we get half the ransom,' declared Doodah.

'Oh, yeah, sorry,' said Lili and picked up her LEP backpack, spilling out fifty unmarked twenty-four carat gold ingots. 'Half.'

'Thank yo very much,' said Mulch and scooped as much of the gold as his arms could carry.

Doodah had the same greedy glint in his eye Mulch did, but acted more professional and loaded the gold into the Gripper to take back.

'Dig him up, Stinky!' said Doodah.

Mulch moved over to Groma.

'Don't even think about it, dwarf!' the goblin/pixie hybrid spat. 'Touch me and I burn your skin off.'

Mulch unhinged his jaw, expanding it to the size of a washing machine's drum, though not nearly as clean.

Groma's eyes widened in horror as Mulch's mouth engulfed him. Initially, he thought the dwarf was going to eat him and started yelling for help, which gave Mulch a very irritating headache. What he was realy doing was covering Groma in dwarf surliva, which was laced with a sedative and quickly knocked out the crime boss.

When Mulch released him, Groma was sleeping like the world's ugliest baby and then proceeded to eat up the earth around him before loading Groma into the back of the Gripper with the gold, securing his hands in special LEP cuffs that stopped his palms meeting with oxygen and starting a fire.

'You ladies want a ride?' asked Doodah.

'No, my dad will be coming soon. The bag has GPS,' said Lili.

'Suit yourselves,' said Doodah. 'Say, err... You think I could get your number or something?'

Lili never had time to reply as Mulch slammed his foot down on the accelerator, which also had Doodah's foot on it.

'Ow!' he yelled. Then he said, 'What you do that for?'

'Because our goblin friend here is a smart one, and I don't want him escaping before we get our cash when he comes to.'

'If I'd got her number, I could have got a whole load of cash when she got her old man's money.'

'OK. Now that's low, especially for a shorty like you.'

Doodah didn't have a reply for once. He was just trying it out. He'd known other people it had worked out for, but things did eventually turn sour for those people. Now that he thought about it, it wasn't the best of ideas. And it was breaking a level of decency deeper than any law.

They drove back to a branch of the LEP suited for troll attacks and dropped off the Gripper, loading their cargo into the back of their MagnaVan. From they went on to Police Plaza, dropping off Groma and collecting the bounty that doubled their earnings.

Once business had been settled, they were given a message from the Council saying their services were needed for a dangerous mission under ludicrous circumstances.

Mulch Diggums smiled when he read that.

'Hey, Doodah,' he said to his partner. 'Looks like Arty's got a job for us.'

CHAPTER 7: FOWL TO THE FUTURE
FOWL MANOR, IRELAND

For every Fowl, there has been a Butler. Their protectors. Their life-long servants. The men and women who were paid to cook, clean and take a bullet for what had once been a family of criminals.

The current Butler and guardian of Artemis Fowl II was sitting at the desk in his room. One eye was flitting through Sir Arthur Conan Doyle's The Hound of the Baskervilles, the other keeping a watchful gaze on the security monitors for the house.

The Eurasian eased back in his swivel chair, relaxing himself for a moment before returning his attention to his multi-tasking. Back in the day, he could watch monitors or observe locations on stakeouts for hours on end, but he had developed as a person since then and now the Fowl affairs were mainly legal.

Sometimes he scolded himself for this, but consoled himself that he could break this mind-set when necessary. Then he remembered that in this business you could never tell when it was necessary to do anything. His job was always so full of surprises.

Then the house intercom emitted his master's voice in crackled tones.

'Butler, come down to my workshop,' he said.

Butler pulled over his suit jacket across his considerable bulk and shoulder holster, the Kevlar jacket hidden underneath his shirt restricting his movement slightly. Then he proceeded outside his room, through the corridors, into the hallway and then down the oak staircase before coming to the wooden steps of the basement entrance.

Butler had cared for Artemis since his birth. He had protected him, tutored him, fought for him, watched over him, and even had a hand in raising him. Butler was like a second father to the boy, and for a time had been his only one.

During these times, the years of adventures had taken their toll on him.

A few years ago, Artemis had arranged a business meeting with the owner of a multinational communications company with mob connections and Butler had accompanied him. The meeting had turned into an incident that almost cost Butler his life, but thanks to Artemis's quick thinking and Holly Short's magical healing powers, Butler survived to fight another day. But Butler's body was forced to also contribute, and gave fifteen years of his life energy to help him heal. So Butler, at the age of forty-four, now had the physical make-up of a sixty-year-old man. Granted, a sixty-year-old man with the stature of a mountain gorilla, but age does terrible things to a body, and it most certainly had done in Butler's case.

The bodyguard had alerted his sensei Madame Ko to his predicament during his three-year-wait for Artemis's return using the excuse that the years were catching up to him. She had recommended a routine of diet and exercise she'd learned from an old Tibetan man that would make Butler feel as if he were thirty years younger. The Tibetan man was currently ninety-seven and was living in Jamaica for the tropical fruit. Every day he would climb up banana trees for food and would knock down coconuts and crack them open with his head for drink. His body was as youthful as that of a twenty-year-old, but he often suffered from terrible headaches due to the coconuts. And aspirin was hard to come by in the tropical islands.

The dieting was easy enough. All Butler needed was the necessary fruits and vegetables and a few ancient herbs mixed into a protein shake. It was the exercise that was the tough part.

A normal person at Butler's age might have a little trouble with exercising, but for the manservant it was terrible. Especially when jogging or on the treadmill. Another thing happened to Butler when Holly had healed him. She had accidentally replicated some Kevlar fibres from Butler's bullet proof vest that had sunk into the gunshot wound that had nearly killed him, and now his breathing was constricted and a fifteen minute jog now seemed like a marathon for the Eurasian. But apart from that, everything was A-OK.

Butler had stuck to this routine of diet and exercise for the past three years. He hadn't felt so alive since Holly had saved him from a troll's attack. Right now, he felt as if he could take on a dozen trolls. Not necessarily in medieval armour though. Perhaps if he just had a really big machine gun.

He came to the solid pine door with iron locks. The basement had originally been a dungeon until the renovations had been made, and now stored various antiques, wines, fine art, several items of sentimental value and Artemis's own private workshop.

The word workshop didn't really seem to apply to the place, though. It seemed more like the laboratory of some crazed scientist mixed with the class rooms of various teachers because of all the blackboards filled with physics calculations, mathematical theorems and blueprints for many contraptions that would leave the most gifted engineer wondering if these were plans for a sci-fi space rocket.

Artemis was currently finishing off a machine's computer coding on a device the size of a Gameboy, its screen showing ones and zeros above the pull-out keyboard. It was another of Artemis's inventions.

'Ready to astound me yet, young master?' asked the manservant.

'For that event, Butler, I am never unprepared.'

Artemis turned around to face him. The boy's eyes were underlined with bags worked on from late and sleepless nights in the last three months. This combined with the boy's ghoulish complexion did nothing for his looks. If he wasn't a genius, the only possible career he'd have was in horror movies.

'When this is over, you need a good night's sleep,' said Butler.

'I agree, but only when this is over,' said the Irish youth.

'A tired and battered soldier is no good on the battlefield. And you look pretty beat.'

'Trying to coax me out of it going again?' said Artemis, always out to establish the angles.

'We're going into the future. Jumping ahead thousands of years. I'm sorry to tell you this, but even your mind isn't that advanced.'

'True. But it can adapt. They are going to need me. And there is little chance of my machine malfunctioning if you're going to try that argument. I've run all the diagnostics.'

'So it's ready?'

'Yes,' said Artemis, taking a theatrical pause between breaths. 'It's ready.'

The young Fowl heir swooped over to a large object covered by a white sheet and dramatically pulled it off for it to be seen by Butler. He'd been practicing for when the rest of the party arrived.

'Complete genius, wouldn't you say, old friend?' asked Artemis in a voice of pure giddiness. This arrogance at his own smarts was one of the main reasons he made so many enemies.

'Indeed, Artemis. It looks like we can now add Dr. Emmett J. Brown to your long list of aliases,' said Butler with the merest hint of humour in his voice.

IRELAND AIRSPACE, 45,000 FEET ABOVE SEA LEVEL

Moving at speeds of near mach one, the new prototype LEP shuttle created by Foaly moved through the sky as graceful as an arrow.

The ship was shaped like a teardrop like most LEP shuttles, but this one was much larger the cramped standard issue aircraft and incorporated a material known as cam foil. Cam foil was a series of matrices that used artificially made diamonds to project an image on its opposite side. Or in simpler terms, put on the cam foil and the image behind the wearer hides from view.

This was an experimental version of cam foil called cam coating. Quite simply, it was a ship's armour coated in cam foil diamonds. Traditionally plasma panels were used, but plasma could be torn and leave holes in the air. Cam foil had its own weaknesses, such as shorting out in the rain or if it was damaged, but the new cam coating was more resilient.

The shuttle was being flown by Holly Short with Mulch sitting in the back stuffing his face with his personal food rations and Doodah observing Holly's manipulation of the ship's controls.

Rushing below them were great blocks of grey coming from rows of buildings with the occasional green of a park poking through.

Fowl Manor lay just outside the city of Dublin, so Holly reduced her speed to two and fifty miles per hour and ran a check to see if any commercial flights were coming her way. Everything came up green.

The same could be said for the horizon. Now that they were away from the city, all that could be seen were fields of olive to emerald.

An icon flashed on her screen showing a lone structure hidden by wall and trees near a road running through the country.

Holly looked on at the place that had taken part in many of fairy history's recent events. It had brought dread, forbidding and happiness to her at different times in her life. Now she only had one thought in her mind.

Fowl Manor, at last.

She steered the shuttle behind the huge imposing structure right next to the stables, activating her shadow lights beforehand.

Captain Short unclipped herself from the pilot's seat and took a look at her passengers.

Mulch had applied his usual layer of super strong and repellant sun block while Doodah was stuck wearing a three-year-old's outfit due to his childish features.

The pixie adjusted his baseball cap so it was turned backwards like he'd seen humans do in his pirate movies.

'Couldn't we have got something a little less... Denim?' asked Doodah, whose entire outfit could have been used for at least two pairs of adult jeans.

'It has to be authentic,' said Holly, barely concealing a smirk. 'Now, if you're both ready, we can get on with the mission.'

Captain Short pushed a button near the access hatch and the door opened. Holly used her magic to shield so that she was invisible and got out of the shuttle. Mulch and Doodah, who were both without magic, got out and dealt with their disguises.

Mulch looked much like a hobo, so he had no complaints. Even when he was rich, he hadn't been fancy.

Holly moved over to pet the flank of a friendly filly and then the three went on to Fowl Manor.

The sky was white with clouds and there was a chill in the September air, green trees filled with the reds, yellows and browns of Autumn season.

The Fowl estate was mostly deserted as had been pre-arranged by Artemis, so they had zero amount of human contact by the time they reached the manor's side-entrance.

Doodah rushed up and knocked on the door. Twenty seconds later it was opened by Butler. The manservant spread an arm wide to allow them admittance, then closed the door behind them.

The huge intimidating bull of a man suddenly seemed much more friendly as he put on a smile at the sights of his friends.

'I'm glad you three are here,' said Butler.

'Wouldn't miss it for the world, big man,' said Holly. 'Are we clear?'

'Yes, you're perfectly fine to turn off your shield.'

Holly did so, and she appeared as if an artist had painted a masterpiece using thin air as a canvas.

The LEPrecon captain hugged Butler's knees, as that was all she could reach. Butler slowly bent so as not hurt his elfin friend before returning the embrace.

'How are you, Mulch? You're partner still frightened of me?'

Mulch shook his head with his usual smirk. 'Nah, I told him though you could snap anybody like a twig, you're just a big old softy. Doesn't believe, me though.'

'Why's that?'

'Because he wouldn't give the truth about what time it is if he can stitch someone up,' piped up the small pixie.

Holly suddenly heard foot steps bouncing off the manor's ancient walls.

'Artemis has come to greet us in person?' she asked.

'No,' said Butler, looking on toward the door.

Within two seconds, a graceful blonde woman came through it, her smile of purest sincerity at seeing the three creatures. This was not the general reception the fairies were accustomed to.

The woman was Angeline Fowl, Artemis's mother.

Holly wasn't sure what was going on here, but let her hand fall to the Neutrino on her hip just in case it was something sinister. Angeline had been used for evil deeds before, though she hadn't really had a choice in the matter.

Angeline's arms were raised wide before settling down to her hips. She looked over them one by one. She came to Mulch and lowered herself to his eye-level.

'Mister Diggums,' she said, and took his hand. 'Artemis has told me everything. He's told me how you've saved him from such dangers, befriended him. I welcome you to my home, and thank you with all my heart for looking out for him.'

She then scooched over to face Doodah.

'Mister Day. Artemis tells me he hasn't known you as long as everyone else here, but says you are beyond dependable, and I thank you for helping him be a better man than I could have dreamed. But everything I have to say to you two goes double for you, Captain.'

She was now looking right into Holly's eyes. Then after a second, she hugged her, catching the elf completely off guard.

'Artemis tells me you've saved his life countless times, and even risked your own to save mine. You made my little Arty a hero. There are no words for me to express how much I must thank you for making him a human being that can set us all on the right path. For years I worried that big brain of his would only be good for the life of a criminal. But you, you put my fears to rest. You gave me back my husband. You've given me back my family. You've given me back my life. Thank you so very much, you remarkable woman.'

Holly just stood there, too shocked for words. Finally, Angeline let her go and showed them down to Artemis's work shop with Butler.

'Any other parents Artemis wants to introduce us to?' Holly whispered to the manservant.

'No,' he silently said back. 'Mister Fowl is away at a board of directors meeting in America.'

The young mastermind was just straightening his tie in a piece of reflective metal when his guests walked in.

'You three made good time,' Artemis commented. 'The new shuttle's engines supersonic?'

'Close as we can get without making a sonic boom and letting everyone know where we are,' said Holly.

While Holly was still talking, Artemis grabbed a device and handed it to his manservant.

'Butler. Please place this somewhere inside the shuttle. It doesn't matter where. Then come straight back.'

Butler did as he was told and jogged off, hoping it wouldn't take too long to find an invisible aircraft with nothing but a rough location and his bare hands.

Artemis stepped over to a large tarpaulin covering some obviously spectacular machine.

Holly smiled.

Typical human wanting to give off a big reveal. Typical Artemis Fowl too.

'Ladies, gentlemen, mythical creatures to all they who don't know better, I give you, in the simplest terms, the world's first time machine,' said Artemis and pulled off the tarp.

Underneath was a square panel fitted with towers that looked like electric pylons sporting a combination satellite dish and TV aerial. Attached to it were half a dozen cables leading off to other computers which were connected to devices only a genius could have assembled. All very complex stuff, but let's just stick to what the reader will understand; It was big, high-tech and looked like it could pick up every TV channel known to man.

'This is magical time travel in technological form,' explained Artemis. 'I had to use components from your own time stop equipment to make it. Demon magic is stored in batteries and we will no longer need to concentrate to get to a specific timeline. That is now the computer's responsibility.'

Holly swallowed. Leaving her life in the hands of a computer was not the most comforting notion.

'This process is to allow us to bring whatever we need through the time tunnel. If we did this normally with nothing more than a demon warlock and our own minds, we would only be able to take a small piece of clothing with us like an undergarment.'

Butler had just walked in, the device out of his hands and on the ship along with a bag of his own weapons and Artemis's computer files. The manservant now hung in the background to catch up on the details.

'Another thing with the time tunnel is a physical alteration which would increase our chances of returning in one piece. An example would be our bodies becoming younger or older by a few years, or decades in the case of fairies.'

This perked up Butler's interest.

'Could that work for me, Artemis?' he asked.

'I had a feeling you'd be asking questions at this point. While we could give you a younger body, the Kevlar in your chest would still be there. Except this body wouldn't have adapted to it and you could end up physically worse than you are now. It could even kill you, and we've been down that road enough times already.'

Butler coughed to cover up his embarrassment, though logically he had no right to feel this way. Three times he had nearly been killed only to be revived in situations beyond his experience or control. A troll had slashed and bashed him, he'd been shot point blank in the chest and finally suffered a heart attack under the control of a power-crazed pixie. After this mission, they would be the good old days.

'So that's one of the primary reasons our bodies will remain unchanged. It's simple to do the same with objects, but for an organic body, a full scan will need to be run of you.'

'Scan?' asked Doodah, lifting up his jeans whenever they fell passed his waist.

'Yes. To transport anything, the time machine will need a blue-print of what it's sending. That's why objects like your technology are so simple. They all have their schematics on file. For a person, we need to make a schematic of them. For this I connected a CT scan to my machine. One analysis and your ready to travel. Koboi will never expect us to have made it through with all this equipment and will be caught totally off guard, leaving us the perfect opportunity to capture and arrest her.'

Not everything Artemis explained was understood, but what was indicated the advantage was with them. Providing Opal hadn't already taken over the world by the time they arrived, that is.

'Please line up and lie down on the CT scan. The device Butler placed on your ship will allow it to be towed by us into the future. I assume it's fully stocked?'

Holly nodded.

'Yes. Some Neutrinos and enough food and water to last the five of us up to three days. We still only have three days, right?'

'Yes. There was nothing I could do to alter that. The device will also make the shuttle a beacon. Anything touching it will be dragged back to this point by the time machine in the location it was originally standing. I had to install a plant in the device so it could work, in case any of you were wondering how I got a machine to absorb magic.'

Holly pressed on toward the CT scan before Artemis could get another lecture in.

This was the human version of the CT scan, though it wasn't much different from the fairy model. Place somebody inside the machine and it would X-ray them from all angles, creating a three-dimensional picture of them. Artemis was at the controls and kept quiet while he concentrated. Then Butler took over when it was Artemis's turn.

All his organs, bones and tissues appeared on the time machine's screen exactly as they were in his body.

When he was finished, he got out and walked over to the panel, disabling the safety protocols, inputting his secret password and pressing his hand on to a gel scanner to confirm his identity.

'Everything is ready,' said Artemis.

Artemis's mother looked beyond words at her son's willingness to help others. She'd dreamed of him being a good person, but also worried about him becoming a criminal like so many of his ancestors day after day. Finally, she knew he was going down the right path.

'Oh, I'm so proud of my little Smarty Arty!' said Angeline, and she hugged her son tighly.

Inside the embrace, Artemis frowned deeply. He hadn't been called 'Smarty Arty' since he was seven when he'd passed his first nuclear physics test.

After a minute, it occurred to her that it was time to say goodbye to her son.

'Don't worry, Missus Fowl,' said Holly. 'Smarty Arty knows exactly what he's doing. Don't you Smarty?'

Artemis's frown returned, but was hidden from his mother's sight.

'She's right, I do know what I'm doing. We'll be there and back in ten seconds.'

Angeline's eyes became more and more worried.

'They are going to need me for this... Mum,' said Artemis, his voice fully convicted and convinced.

Angeline rubbed above her cheek a little. When her hand came away, her fingers were wet.

'I know, my darling. Take good care of yourself,' she said and hugged him again.

Artemis pulled out of the embrace and initiated the thirty second countdown, then got into his place. A beeping started emitting from a speaker and began quickening as time went on.

'Join hands, everyone,' he instructed. 'It will make the process much easier for the machine.'

Everyone was a little anxious, as Artemis could clearly tell by the shallow breaths everyone was taking.

'Are you sure you've figured everything out, Artemis?' asked Holly, a touch nervous herself. 'All the calculations and the physics mumbo jumbo has been sorted out? You sure you haven't miscalculated or anything?'

Artemis let out an irritated snort. 'Please. My mathematical prowess is on par with the great Archimedes. Though if I ever discern the answer to one of the world's greatest problems while bathing, I'll be sure to put on a towel before running through the streets of Syracuse screaming "Eureka!"'

Holly pouted, but her chest eased itself out a bit. Artemis was only this smug when he knew he was right.

The beeping was getting faster, as were their hearts from the tension. It seemed as if it was uncannily keep rhythm with their pulses. They held tense silences and could feel their own blood pumping, as well as in the hands they were holding.

Then the beeping became so fast it was like a continuous whine.

Then what looked like clouds of sparking mist shot into the bodies of all of them and into the ship outside, leaving behind ghost images of our heroes and their lifeline to the present.

CHAPTER 8: GUARDIANS
Artemis and company travelled through what could only be described as a water slide made of stars of red, blue and various purples. In between small gaps space could be seen and so could pieces of history. They could smell city exhausts, battles filled with sweat and blone in the air as the atoms that made them drifted at speeds greater than light itself.

Usually they would have to maintain concentration or risk being lost to time by blending with the time tunnel, but the computer got rid of that and they could observe these spectacles for the flashes they appeared.

Moments of history yet to come was seen by them. Explosions, technological marvels, new species. Then, for the strangest time, floating earth surrounding the planet to be replaced by grassy country and rustic cities, expanding as they travelled further into the future.

Then the light came at the end of the tunnel, and it was time to depart.

Everyone! Head for the light, Artemis broadcast.

They followed his orders and were absorbed by the brightness, as if they had just walked into a white sun.

EARTH, ABOVE THE FORMER LOCATION OF IRELAND, 12,011 YEARS INTO THE FUTURE

The two humans and three fairies all landed right on their feet, holding the same position they had at back at Fowl Manor.

Travelling through time was always different. This time is was extremely tiring and they all felt a little fatigued, but their energy was quickly coming back as they relaxed and their breathing returned to normal.

Artemis looked around. Sight upon exiting the time stream was akin to putting on a freshly cleaned pair of glasses. The images seemed crisp and sharper, and the colours were even more grand than they were only seconds ago, like a fifties' television compared to a plasma flat-screen.

Though there was not much to see.

They were standing on a beach, a chill wind brushing against them with a sky filled with white clouds hanging above their heads. Typical for a September this side of the world, so the climate hadn't changed that much.

Their ship had landed a few metres nearby and they all got in and buckled down.

Artemis went straight for the shuttle's computer, reading the Gnommish words and settling for a course of action.

Foaly had left behind several onboard computer programs for them to use should they have gone to the future. These included hacking, which Artemis intended to use to hijack a satellite and collect data for their mission.

Meanwhile, Holly secured herself in the pilot's seat while Doodah took up the position of co-pilot. It made sense. Though Doodah was an excellent driver and could operate anything with a working engine, Holly was built for flying. An analogy between the two of them would be like comparing a claw hammer to a nail gun. A hammer is good for a fair few jobs around the house, but a nail gun was built for precision and did its job better than any other tool could.

All the others on the shuttle spent time looking out of the windows of the invisible craft, viewing the Earth millennia on. Not much had changed, but so far all they had was a sea view and a sky to go on, and that was only seen as a fleeting glance as they went at speeds of mach one.

Soon, Artemis put the monitor to sleep and turned his chair to face everyone.

Holly put on the autopilot to focus her full attention on Artemis.

'First order of business, you'll all be glad to know we arrived at the appropriate time,' said Artemis, starting with the good news. 'Now events are about to become more complicated. To track Opal, I brought with me the program I was working on to install on the fairy technology attached to human satellites. That technology no longer exists, meaning either it is more advanced that the equipment we are supplied with, or fairies have taken a different route of monitoring humanity. Either way means our only way to track Opal will be to apply the program to a satellite network ourselves. The only grid under a single controller is hack proof from here. Meaning we either go into space, or break into the facility where the satellites are being controlled. My investigations on this world's Internet reveal them to be owned by a military organisation called the Guardian Units of the Nation.'

'So we're going to have to break in to a human military complex,' said Holly.

'Yes. Their weapons are only a few decades ahead of what we have now. It seems humans might have gone back a bit on the clock from some sort of global disaster. I can't say what, though.'

'What are we up against?' asked Butler.

'The majority of their weapons are typical of what any military would have now,' said Artemis. 'News reports state they have made recent developments in the fields of robotics and have both manned attack mechas and automatons acting under artificial intelligence programs, but nothing too remarkable. Their AI is no better than that of a video game's, so they're not too smart. But obviously, we are going to try and avoid all that. Holly, please head to the co-ordinates on the computer screen. We'll do a sweep of this facility then forge a plan, though I have one brewing already.'

Holly felt a know tie in her stomach out of tension, but she'd come to associate that with Artemis's plans.

She gunned the throttle of the shuttle and they were flying over a night time metropolis, lights shining below as if multi-coloured stars had landed on Earth.

'Station Square, capital of the United Federation, the human government,' explained Artemis.

'It all looks very clean,' said Butler in admiration. 'Is it new?'

'No. It's been around for centuries. Built after an attack I'm looking into. Aha!' Artemis proclaimed. A monitor displaying the city outside highlighted one building in neon green and the ship came closer towards it. 'GUN Base 56. It's the main military defence facility for Station Square.'

Holly looked at her own monitor. 'The ship's picking up plenty of heat signatures from the guards in that place. I'd say there are at least two hundred soldiers in there, and another fifty on the outside.'

Artemis mulled this over. 'The venhilation shafts should be clear.'

'You want us to crawl through those?' said Holly. 'That is completely insane.'

'And I know someone crazy enough for the job,' replied Artemis, turning his head to Mulch.

'Me? I don't no nothing about computers, and I did not sign up to get shot at,' yelled the dwarf.

'We don't need you to steal anything for us. Yet. All we need you for is reconassice. You just have to wear an iris-cam, film all the hallways as you crawl above them, find the room we need, then search for an escape route. Once that's all done, you walk out. Surely such a thief of your status can accomplish this? And a couple of other things,' said Artemis as ideas continuously popped in his head like popcorn in a pan.

Mulch winked and gave a thumbs up. 'No problem. Especially if it earns me some extra cash from you, rich boy. And maybe a couple of free dinners from KFC.'

'Done. Once Mulch's mission is successful, Butler and I shall enter the building and hijack the satellites.'

The manservant turned to his master. 'And how will we get in? If we knock out the guards at the gate, the cameras will spot us. And we can't sneak in without being caught by either human or mechanical eyes.'

Artemis leaned towards the shuttle's front window, pointing to a lone soldier in full body armour on patrol in the street. 'I'd say that guard on duty was about your size, wouldn't you?'

Butler smirked, catching on to Artemis's plan. 'I knock him out, steal his uniform and walk straight in, eh?'

'Not exactly. Once you've stolen his clothing and ID card, you'll take me as a prisoner to be interrogated on charges of being a spy. My searches revealed that the United Federation is at war with a nation called the Eggman Empire. I pose as one of their agents in your custody and when the coast is clear, we sneak into the control room for the satellites and install my program. We'll use the film from Mulch's iris-cam to forge a map.'

Artemis turned to Holly. 'Any objections about this, Captain?'

Holly shook her head. 'Nope. Like I said, you're the smarty, Arty.'

Artemis's expression was initially, then it formed into a prominent sccowl. 'When exactly am I going to hear the end of this?'

'Depends. When do you turn fifty?'

STATION SQUARE, GUN BASE 56, LEVEL 5 RECREATION ROOM

In GUN Base 56's rec room, Corporal Topaz McKnight, twenty-eight-year old top G.U.N. agent, was facing off against her superior, Captain Rich Taylor, a dark man with a face filled with frantic blue hair going in all directions with limbs as big as tree stumps.

She gripped her pool cue, fingertips blue with chalk, aimed and pocketed her last ball.

'That's another twenty you owe me,' she said.

Rich had lost six times in a row, and was losing his cool. 'OK. How about this, you win the next game, I'll give you double all the money you won. But if I win, I get my cash back. Fancy earning over a century quick?'

'You're on!'

'Stop kidding yourself, Rich,' piped up Commander Hugo Brass. 'That girl beats you every time.'

'Save your breath. You know he never learns,' said Commander Lionel Westwood. 'All the military protocols have filled up his head. There's no room for anything else.'

'I can hear you!' yelled Rich.

'We know, that's why we do it!' piped up Lionel's son, Reginald. 'The sight of every vain in your face nearly popping is hilarious.'

The three men away from the pool table were playing poker around a coffee table, Commander Westwood on the sofa with Captain Westwood and Brass taking the two chairs.

Lionel was a grey-haired man in his late fifties, currently the highest-ranking and most respected commander in the Guardian Units of the Nations, having got very far on his pilot's instinct and iron will.

Brass was a long-time friend of the commander's with a black beard like a lion's mane, and was not the type a soldier would argue with if they didn't want to get yelled at and thrown in military prison for a couple of days. He was a little over-eager, and willing to speak up against authority for what he believed in, but he was a good man at heart.

Reginald Westwood was a by-the-book captain, who recently had been focusing more on his career now that his wife was pregnant. With a baby on the way, a bit of extra cash in his income wouldn't hurt too much. He had bright red hair he inherited from his mother, and his father's mis-matched eyes which he hid behind a pair of sunglasses he never took off. This had been a habit of his ever since his school-days when he'd been nicknamed "Mis-match Reg." The kids at his school hadn't been particularly bright.

Brass took a shot of whiskey from his flask.

'You shouldn't drink while your playing cards, y'know,' said Captain Westwood.

'Reg, be quiet. If he wants to lose his money like a good drunken gambler, that's his decision,' said Lionel.

'Please. I'm not drunk,' defended Brass. 'I never get drunk. I get a little tipsy, but five minutes off the drink and I'm fine.'

'Is that why you have double-vision?' asked Reg.

'What makes you think I have double-vision?'

'Because the last match you put down a pair of aces thinking there were four of them! You should know there aren't four red aces, anyway.'

Brass's cheeks went a deeper shade of red, embarrassment mixing with the alchohol he'd gulped down.

Lionel swapped one of his cards when a frantic yelled accompanied by a loud bang sounded. He turned round to see Topaz with her palm outstretched waiting for her money, and Captain Taylor having a tantrum.

'One more game. I'll triple what you've won,' said Rich desperately.

'Nuh-uh. You've got enough debt to pay. Call it a night,' said the corporal.

Taylor reached into one of the numerous pockets in his uniform and pulled out his wallet, handing over his money to Topaz. He then grabbed one of his cigars and lit it, easing the stress from his losses.

Just as he began relaxing and walked over to join in on the poker game, five of the burliest and most scarred of G.U.N.'s soldiers walked in. They looked like a typical thug gang, albeit a thug gang packing serious fire power and with enough training and experience to take down a group five times their size.

They didn't look it at the moment, though. They seemed more worn out by the looks of it.

The soldier with messy-hair, one Corporal Brett, walked straight up to his superior.

'Search conducted, Captain Taylor,' he said. 'Nothing found.'

Topaz's attention was drawn, and so was Commander Westwood's, the latter actually folding from his game to come listen.

The burly Captain Taylor stepped aside to let the Commander through. Lionel Westwood had this general effect on people, especially when it came to inferiors and moody college students working check-out. The latter trick he picked up from his late wife.

'Full report, Corporal.'

Brett took in a long breath through his nose and recalled the events of the day.

'Me and the rest of SA2 entered the abandoned human research facility at 05:00. We scattered and kept in touch with our radios. Knowing the robot, Isaac, was always armed we took proper... Precautions.'

'In the form of something that could do a lot of damage?' accused Westwood, on good authority.

'Yeah. We brought rifles and pistols in with us. All of our non-lethal weapons used eletricty and would probably wipe the whole thing, so we figured at least some of the tin man would be in piece if we were careful. We searched for the robot that looked like Omega and scanned it. All we got were a bunch of messed up files. Then we put our guns to good use when an Eggman attack force came. He must have been watching the place since his last visit. Took us twelve hours to find another way out.'

'It was definitely Isaac you found?' asked Commander Westwood, more concerned with the mission since his men had obviously made it out alright.

'Yeah, it was there. Big, white and broken down, guarding a corpse kept in the world's most advanced refrigerator,' huffed Brett.

'I thought Shadow said it was gold?' said Topaz.

'Well, your old partner's report said white from tip to top, and that's what we found,' said Brett. 'Maybe it had a paint-job done.'

Lionel mulled this over, thinking back to the distinct features of the robot mentioned in G.U.N.'s reports. 'Agent Rouge said it had the number one-hundred and one on the side.'

'Yeah, that's right. One zero one. We found the right robot.'

'Or maybe the robot you picked up was a decoy from Eggman,' said Topaz. 'It sounds as if the robot was the bait to lure you into an ambush. Someone was bound to go looking for the data on that antique. Shadow said when he encountered Isaac it was perfectly lucid, but Rouge said it was practically insane. If a robot can stay in one piece and think logically for twelve thousand years, surviving a virtual apocolypse, how did it manage to get its screws loosened within a few months?'

Commander Westwood took a stance of action.

'Topaz is right. It doesn't add up. Tomorrow you go back there and strip the place until you've found every room, every facility and every bathroom in that base. If we can't get anything out of Isaac, we'll get it from the notes on file while searching for the robot's quarters. It's got to have a little nest of its own somewhere in that place. If you don't find him there, then Eggman must have him, and who knows what he'd do with that kind of information.'

Brett only took the tomorrow part in, knowing there'd be a briefing in the morning. He went over to join the rest of his team, who had relieved the rec room's mini fridge of a six pack.

While Brett was swigging down his beer, Topaz noticed the time on her watch and decided to call it a night after one quick social call in the base.

Brett, who was now trying to help his team-mate Rico figure out which of a vending machine's candy bars to choose to soak the alchohol, saw her leave and slicked his hair back, following her.

Rico had just come out into the hall looking for another vending machine, picking up a little of the conversation. Better get his candy bar quick. Never good to have your superior mad at you for eavesdropping.

'Hey, Topaz!' shouted a young and eager voice.

Topaz looked around a saw a young blonde girl of fifteen in red and black over-roles carrying an orb attached to some device. She walked up for Topaz to see it.

'It's my new invention,' she said proudly. 'I've been working on it as a side-project. I call it the Sunshine Ball. They absorb the sun's rays from up in the sky and project them through these orbs. It'll mean natural light and heating can be brought to every home whenever somebody wants. It'll be much cheaper than anything else once everything's up and running. Here, I'll show you.'

Hope bushed a button on the metal part supporting the orb. It flickered for a moment, then went dead.

'It needs constant contact with the sun. I tried powering it in the sun with solar panels for a few minutes when I finished it, but haven't got that much power. Maybe if I add a solar ray enhancer and increase magnification of the sun's rays...'

By this point, Topaz knew instictively it was time to act before she was flooded with technical jargon.

'I'll look at it tomorrow when it's working. There's some planning I have to do with Sigma Alpha-2 for their next mission.'

'Stick to making weapons, short-stuff,' said Rico. 'You're good at that. You're just wasting tax payer's money.'

Rico was the size of a bear and equally fierce in battle. Despite this, Hope got angry and defended herself.

'I'm good at making other stuff too! This'll be finished soon. And you can forget testing out my new stuff again.'

'Good! Someone else can get blown up for a change.'

'My new vulcanised ceramics only blow up what you want them to blow up! Or what I want them to blow up, so be careful.'

'Ha! As if you could handle a gun.'

'I might not, but Shadow and Omega can, and they owe me plenty of favours.'

Rico actually bit his tongue for once. His mama had always told him to pick his fights carefully and if he took on Team Dark's heavy hitters, his mama would be nagging in his dreams every night he lay in a hospital bed.

'So... These falcon dynamics? What are they,' asked Rico, pretending to take an interest to change the subject.

'Vulcanised ceramics. They're bullets as hard as diamond and are hot enough to burn through solid steel. All I had to do was sharpen the ceramics, then vulcanise them and coat them in an oil I made. The heat from your gun ignites them so they could melt a block of ice in one shot.'

'Really? That for shooting up robots? How's that oil work?'

While Hope went into a ramble, knowing what Rico was up to but wanting to bore him to death despite this, Topaz snook off and Brett followed suit.

'About this planning of yours, maybe we could do it back at my place,' said Sigma-Alpha-2's captain. 'I've got some old action figures we could use as models.'

Topaz could see through a hopeless ploy at romance a mile away. 'Play dollhouse with you? I don't think so.'

'Hey, they're action figures and I keep 'em for sentimental reasons!'

Butler had been surprised to find the soldier was not human at all, but a bear that had human similarities.

'Anthropomorphic animals employed by the military,' Artemis explained.

'Did G.U.N. make them?' asked Butler.

'I don't think so. Look down in the streets. There are similar creatures partaking in modern day tasks like shopping or heading home from work. A new species must have evolved, possibly through a merging of animal and human DNA. Possibly through mutagenic exploitation.'

Artemis then gave the short version that the creatures were mutant animals with human physiques.

Butler then stole the bear's uniform and gave the unconscious soldier to Holly to place out of harm's way. It was wierd for Butler wearing the bear's clothes, as it was the first time he had ever worn anything loose on him.

Outside the security office, Hope was walking to the entrance with her Sunshine Ball, looking for Topaz.

She'd heard her voice, but then it was followed by two foreign ones, and they didn't sound friendly. One voice had enough timber to keep a lumber yard running for a week.

Invisibility gave Butler the advantage, but it'd be easy to tell where he was when he started attacking and then there would be trouble. After all, Sigma-Alpha 2 had youth and greater arms on their side, but they were fatigued at the moment after a long day spent searching. Not to mention the fact that they were a touch tipsy from the canned beers they'd had not too long ago, so speed was going to be a key element if Butler wanted victory.

The manservant charged at them and knocked into the team like a wrecking ball through brick. Except this wrecking ball came with additional destructive devices, namely Butler's arms.

The moment Butler's figure touched the group of G.U.N. agents, his hands flailed around to precise locations on their bodies and reduced them to unconsciousness. And when he couldn't reach a certain soldier's pressure point, he threw his arm back before letting fly, and the soldier would be flown into the nearest wall.

Butler opened the door to the janitor's closet and through a waiting Artemis the cam foil.

'Artemis, take the girl and go on ahead. I'll stir this hornet's nest up a bit. Have them focus on getting to me. That should distract them enough to not notice you.'

Taylor was first to the arms box on the wall, grabbing twin machine guns and enough ammo to last him through three fire-fights.

'Activate the X-ray filters. Find out what this guy's carrying,' ordered Brass into the walkie-talkie attached to his shirt as he took out a shotgun.

Commander Westwood was still taking out a pistol when the other two commanders charged off in pursuit.

Butler took the next right, hoping to meet up with his master. Instead, he got a little surprise in the form of three big robots.

Artemis was still under the cam-foil with Hope, but there were three G.U.N. Walkers standing between them, each armed with missiles and machines guns, and two with plasma cannons. They were coloured yellow and turqoise all with flying capability, and one was constantly hovering due to its lack of legs.

Butler cracked his neck and knuckles. To get past these mechanical guardians, the manservant would have to cause mass destruction, property damage and perhaps singe a uniform or two. Ah well. Time to go to work. Let's hope G.U.N. had insurance.

'Negative. Whatever the heck this thing is, no way is it human. It's more like a tank with legs.'

The last robot with no legs was still standing, so to speak. Butler could see the panels on its missile silos opening, and saw an opportunity. In less time that it would time to say, 'Oh dear me,' Butler put a single shot into a missile on each holder. They exploded with a second of each other, spreading to all the other missiles and starting a chain reaction, eventually blowing up altogether. But the pilot was safe in the cockpit, and the rest of guardian robot, code named Flying Dog, was now lying on the ground.

'Holly, activate the X-ray filter on my iris-cam. I want to be able to see these guys coming and what they're carrying.'

'Roger, big man.'

'Wait! Let's head to weapons testing. There's a car there with bullet-proof plating,' said Brass.

'A tank on wheels. Just what we need to turn this fight around.'

Butler saw what looked like a pair of robotic legs joined together with a seat and twin guns on either side of the headrest.

'What is that?' asked the manservant.

'CV-4', said Hope. 'Walker unit made for Mobians. The bullets won't penetrate the car's armour.'

Butler reset his brain. No use even if it could punch through the car.

He looked around the room again and came back to the CV-4. Right next to it were baseballs. Undoubtedly used to test the machine's targetting system.

Now he had his plan.

There was an air vent near the ceiling, five metres up. He pulled out his weapon and melted the venthilation grate and snatched it from the air when it fell to avoid noise giving the game away.

Butler grabbed a baseball, pulled back his arm behind his head and let it fly. It went straight into the vent and started bonging around inside.

Brass and Taylor immediately started shooting the source of the noise.

'He's in the vents!' yelled Rich, stating the obvious just as he would with his soldiers. Always good to make sure everyone knew where your bullets should go.

Butler took his chance and sweeped around the corner, gun raised. Two shots and it was over. Rich and Brass lay unconscious on the floor next to their vehicle.

Then big metal doors slid down from the ceiling, blocking their path.

'Press on!' said Artemis.

'Corroded metal,' explained one young mastermind to the other. 'I had acid sprayed on them before we came in.'

The car went through the doors snugly and Butler applied the brakes with one massive foot, skidmarks showing their trail. Butler got out of the car and accessed the control panel on the wall to seal the door behind them.

Then he noticed from behind the archway they were near a helipad with a twin propellor heavy-lift helicopter already docked.

Two soldiers with automatic rifles, another two engineers and one pilot. The engineers seemed to be fitting a machine gun on to a small robot. Regardless of what they were doing, they were in Butler's way, so he took cover behind the car's door, relieved Artemis of his borrowed Neutrino and started shooting.

The men shot back, but the car's armour held and they were soon unconscious.

'You're letting me go?' said an astounded Hope.

Artemis just shrugged. 'You're supposed to be a genius. Think about it. What use do I have for you now?'

Then a whoosh sound came from above.

Butler drew his gun again and took a look around.

Hope was fiddling with her pocket, obviously trying to get a picture to determine more about the invisible ship. Good luck to her. Any photo taken of an LEP ship would be useless since it gave out a strong signal that would distort the pictures.

Then Butler heard the whoosh again, and engines. Something was coming towards them from above. The rooftops of GUN Base 56.

Then it happened. What looked like a black disc with a seat attached came hurtling towards Butler. Then the manservant saw chopper blades inside the disc. That was some sort of hover vehicle, and it was heading right for him!

One of the crates opened by the engineers had a metal body shield inside and Butler grabbed it. Not a moment too soon as the flying vehicle slammed into Butler, but the shield took most of the impact. Butler was sure one of his ribs cracked when he hit the ground, though.

'If you're going to try and kill him, be warned. He's died three times already.'

'Grande out! Grenade out!'

'Get back here! It's still got the pin in, you idiots!'

'Wait, I recognise those robots. That's from an ancient movie series. That's Terminator ! That kid tricked us with freaking Terminator clips!'

While the Commander was thinking up a plan of action, a soldier in full battle armour came up to Westwood and saluted sternly before him.

'Sir! Team Dark has made contact with us in an e-mail. They request a video conference with you and Miss Kintobor. They say the situation with Doctor Finitevus is critical and will need support from the both of you.'

Commander Westwood turned to his colleagues.

'We'll have to leave these guys for later. They may be a threat later on, but right now we're dealing with a potential apocolypse. Miss Kintobor, we're going to need your help. I'm going to have to ask you to be strong right now. If our agents requested your assistance, that means they need you to build something for them.'

Hope's lip was quivering a little with nerves, but she soon gave a firm nod. It wasn't as if this had been her first time in a terrifying situation.

'Good. Hugh, get her whatever soft drink in the vending machines has the most caffeine in. Help her nerves settle.'

'Let's see... According to these files, the current year is 14,017. Or 3238 locally.'

CHAPTER 9: ARTEMIS ON THE HUNT
Butler put on a trench coat that, surprisingly, hid a vast amount of his bulky frame and a cloth cap atop his head.

'How do I look?' he asked.

'Like a tall Del Boy,' said Holly, barely concealing her fit of giggles.

'Thanks.'

Then jolts of magic flowed like electricity through Opal's arm, empowering her until she was full to the brim with magic. Sparks flashed and fizzled all over Opal, driving out the human hormones that had humanised her. The magic restored the sheen to her hair and brightened the devious twinkle in Opal's eyes to a radiant lust for power that could light up the darkest cave like a disco.

Opal grabbed the local newspaper, The Soleanna Shopper, from a public recycle bin and checked the date. She'd arrived at the right time. Her genius had worked. Then again, why wouldn't it? It was her mind power that had achieved this. No one else's.

Then Opal's eye caught the picture on the front page. The title read "HONEYMOON HEROES," by Tiara Boobowski.

Curious, she started reading.

Late last night, a fire broke out at the popular Solaris Hotel. The fire is said by authorities to have started in the kitchen when a chef's hat caught fire. The chef in question ran out of the hotel's kitchen with his hat smoking, and flung it off on to a table where a couple were dining. A waiter serving a particularly strong choice of wine dropped the bottle on to the flaming hat, causing the small fire to comsume the table and quickly spread throughout the hotel due to alchohol being a flammable beverage. The fire alarm was sounded, but a malfunction in the electrical system stopped it from reaching the top floor, twelve stories up. Hotel guests there were trapped by blinding smoke, - Continued on page 7.

Opal quickly flicked through the pages.

Continued from front page - until newlyweds Sonic the Hedgehog and Princess Sally Acorn arrived on the scene. Sonic quickly navigated his way through the hotel and made his way to the top floor, and actually jumped out of the window with the guests in his arms. While this was happening, Princess Sally helped in instructing the fire crews on managing the fire and seeing civilians to safety. Go girl! The recently married couple were then awarded medals for bravery by Princess Elise III herself. Princess Sally then stated to all of those watching that their actions should be taken as an example of how the people of the world needed to keep a strong alliance during their fight to the Eggman Empire. Her husband, however went for simpler statement and said, "Just doing it for kicks. No biggie. Saving people's what I do, and it's what we all gotta do!" Words to live by, for sure. The couple are to return to New Mobotropolis tomorrow morning after witnessing the Festival of the Sun on show tonight to celebrate the anniversary of the lighting of Solaris, the now extuinguised Flame of Hope that brought light into the lives of many. We wish Sonic and Sally thanks and happy trails on their journey home. Seeya later, guys!

Butler was out searching in the city of Soleanna for the next several hours, leaving his comrades to sit in the ship and develop cramp. It was worst for Mulch, who got up and walked around every few minutes in fear that his lower half would get numb, and when you're a dwarf in the tunneling business, a numb bottom could prove fatal during mining "procedures" for reasons I choose not to go further into.

Holly decided to pass the time with some conversation, so she asked Artemis a simple question to get them started.

'How's life?' she asked.

'...What?' asked Artemis. The boy had been dropping off when Holly had blurted out her question. You couldn't blame him for dozing off. They'd all been getting tired. Artemis deserved it especially. The Irish youth had not had a good night's sleep since his mother became Opal's unwilling slave.

'How's life?' Holly repeated. 'Anything new?'

'Not recently.' Artemis then thought for a moment or two before smiling at a memory and speaking up. 'Although, there is this one incident that's amusing to look back on. Before mother got ill, she sent me off for a week at a normal school for a trial run. I tried to make some friends there, nobody on my intelligence level, of course. Especially the physics professor. Most of the equations he gave to us didn't make sense and several times I had to correct him. He said it was the first time in twenty years anybody had corrected him. Not surprising, really. Every other student there was barely able to grasp the subject. Anyway, I was talking with this girl and mentioned I liked opera. Her reply was, "Oh, I love her show too!" The scatter-brained delinquent thought I was talking about some American talk-show host called Oprah Winfrey.'

After having a bit of a giggle over this, Holly asked Artemis another question. 'Finally started talking to girls your own age then?'

'Not in that sense. The girl in particular was the boyfriend of an exchange student I thought was stealing from my locker. I was making casual conversation to find out more about him.'

'And you thought talking to a teenage girl about opera was casual?'

Artemis shrugged. 'It seemed reasonable at the time. Though that was before I realised how low on the IQ scale she was. Anyway, instead of trying to catch the culprit, I came up with the more effective solution of having Butler escort me to school. Butler eyed the crowd there in his usual terrifying glare, the thief panicked and my belongings were returned to my locker before the bell rang.'

'Because of Butler? He's scary and all, but you've faced worse.'

'You're comparing a criminal mastermind to a teenager reduced to stealing from lockers so he can get his hands on the latest computer games,' said Artemis, his eyebrow raised. 'Surely you think better of me than that, Holly.'

'A thief's a thief no matter the crime. You still steal things. Just things that could buy you all of Ubisoft instead of one of their video games.'

Their playful conversation was interrupted by a burst of sound on the shuttle's communicator. Butler was on the other end.

'Artemis!' he cried out. Through the fairy speaker, it sounded as if the manservant was actually in the room with them. 'I've got her!'

'You've captured Opal?' asked Holly.

'No, but I've got her in my sights,' replied the bodyguard. It was now night time in Soleanna and the streets were packed with people due to some sort of local festival. Stone torches lit up the streets to give the city a feel of how it was like six hundred years ago when it was first built.

Opal was moving her way through the crowds, trying not to attract too much attention to herself, but the bodyguard had once spotted an assassin at a rock concert while protecting the teenage daughter of a British lord. It had been easy, really. The man had made no attempts to blend in whatsoever. He hadn't even dyed his hair some bright colour, for heaven's sake.

Butler jumped on to a particularly large boat resplendent with dancing girls, and startled many of them, but they did not let out screams as to alert the authorities.

'Never a gondola around when you need one,' said Butler, matter-of-factly, and jumped off the opposite end of the boat and on to left side of the canal.

'Hey, big guy, you know that those big stone things called bridges work too, right?' said Mulch. The spout of humour was the dwarf's way of concealing stress. If Opal got away now, things could get really bad really quickly.

'Argh! Aliens!' screamed the solider. Two illegal immigrants ran for it on the spot.

CHAPTER 10: CRASHING THE CASINO
Rushing through the sky at seven hundred miles per hour was the FFF-15 from Soleanna to New Mobotropolis. Thanks to New Megaopolis now being wide open to the Freedom Fighters, they had access to all of the files within the city and those in Robotropolis due to Dr. Eggman keeping them all linked to preserve his plans and data.

There, they discovered plans for a shuttle called the Shriekbot equipped with Flash Thrusters capable of at speeds of near mach one. The engineers at New Mobotropolis had been instructed to adapt these for commercial flight to make their new home more independant and to quickly bring supplies in and out of the city. They were also to be used in times of emergency when an evacuation was necessary.

'Aunt Sally! Cosmo and I have got something really cool to show you.'

'Mint candy! Awesome!'

'In two weeks, one of my agents working for our government will go over your marriage papers and discover that no witnesses have signed to the event, making it null and void. In the mean time, you'll have to voice doubts about your marriage like saying you're too young, or the threat of Eggman needs your devoted attention. I trust you laid some before the wedding?'

'Yes, I talked with Bunnie about my own doubts. She's something of a gossip, and she'll probably tell Antoine. If she doesn't spread word about it, someone will overhear them.'

'Excellent.'

'Sally, I'd like to know, how fond of little Alexis are you?'

'She's a cherub.'

'You feel like she's family, though she's merely my step-daughter?'

'Of course,' said Sally. This conversation was decidely wierd, and Sally turned toward her brother to get answers. 'Elias, is something wrong?'

'Couldn't be further from it. Sally, you're going to be a full-fledged aunt.'

Sally's eyes widened and her lips rose in a smile of disbelief. 'Meg is pregnant?'

A slow nod was all her brother could manage.

'Oh, Elias, that's wonderful!' Sally said, hugging him. 'How far along is she? Have you thought up any names yet?'

Elias couldn't hold in a small chuckle. 'She's only five weeks, and we're still coming up with suggestions. She likes Elissa for a girl, and I've thought of Zacharias for a boy.' Suddenly, his joyful face became stern and determined. 'Sally, your next mission must succeed. I won't allow my child to be brought up in a world of warfare. I don't want it to have to go out and fight or live in fear for its loved ones. Eggman has terrorised this planet. We must stop him from taking power again. I want him stopped, as much for Alexis as for my own child. Please, Sally, I'm depending on you now.'

Realising just how much her brother really was, she nodded firmly, her eyes showing such determination that you would have thought she would walk through fire to reach whatever goal she had.

'Council of Acorn, I have called you here to discuss preparations for war should Dr. Eggman regain power. I put forth that we recreate the War Ministry, and give title of Warlord to General Amadeus Prower. NICOLE will be his advisor as she has downloaded information on Eggman's method and tactics from E-123 Omega of the United Federation at G.U.N.. Ladies and gentlemen, if the Freedom Fighters and Team Dark fail today, a new war will be on our hands. If we are to keep losses of life to a minimum, we will have to strike back quick. To this, I propose forming a new organization. The New Mobotropolis Military. Should war break out, I feel these actions will be absolutely necessary. Please place your debates by a show of hands.'

The newlyweds saw what looked like a child's kiddy car fashioned after a plane. It was no bigger than five feet in legth and a metre in width, not including the wings. It was mainly a deep yellow with black and sported Tails's trademark symbol of twin tails on both wings with twin exhaust pipes on the back.

'This is the Whirlwind. It's a one-man plane I made. It can travel up to a speed of three hundred miles per hour. I made it so when we're fighting off Eggman's ships or cannons, it'll be too small for them to hit. It wouldn't be as effective going up against other planes or a jet though. It'll also be great if we want to mount a rescue mission. It's smaller than any other plane in existance, so we can sneak right under Eggman's radar.'

'How high can this thing go?' asked Sonic.

'Anywhere from a foot to one thousand two hundred feet. It's also got tech that I can drop out on the battlefield.'

'What kind of tech are we talking about, big guy?'

'Two new robots I made out of medical equipment from New Megaopolis. Eggman made stuff that'll be a big help to us. He probably made it to guarantee he recovered from any battle with you, Sonic. I used the tech to make the Medi Bot and the Shield Bot. One robot heals someone injured in a danger zone while the other projects a force field to protect them from danger. The shield isn't very powerful, though, and the Medi Bot can only handle less critical wounds, but they should be a big help in field medical aid.'

'What about weapons? How will it hold itself out in the middle of a battle?'

'It's got laser guns hidden in these two black sections near the cockpit. The propellors are covered in nanites that conduct a small shield that absorb energy, so if the laser hits the propellors, it'll be redirected back into the plane's engine. There's also something a little less sophisticated I made called a Flash Bang for tricky situations. It's just a flash grenade, smoke and lights, but it's got the bonus feature of a very weak narcotic. I can drop it right on enemies and they'll be disoriented, and during all the hussle whoever they've got cornered can escape. One last thing is an onboard scanner that can pin-point a robot's weaknesses, making it easier for me to target them.'

Sally still wasn't used to hearing technical jargon coming from someone not even into his teens. She just kneeled down gave him a big kiss, saying 'Come here, my little genius.' Cosmo looked a little jealous.

'That'll be Knuckles. He's been giving me combat lessons by hologram, but now I help him out with his ancestors. The Brotherhood of Guardians want the echidnas to move back to Angel Island, but they all want to stay at Albion. But that might change. Last week, the Brotherhood installed some kind of device on Angel Island so they could direct where it would fly to so it could be near Albion and they could keep the echidnas safe. It was a really good idea. A squadron of Eggman robots in these new aircrafts came to take the out the city. Angel Island's anti-aircraft systems managed to shoot them all down before they could do any damage though.'

'We heard about that. Even more reason Eggman's got to be stopped.'

'It'd be easier if the Brotherhood would help, but they still refuse even though they've seen what Eggman's capable of. The echidnas want to help in the effort, and the Dark Legion even went over there today to join them and act as a new means of defence with the Albion Security Team.'

'Err.. Tails, I think Knux'll be getting impatient.'

'Oh right!'

'Where the heck were you? I was wondering if I should send out a rescue party.'

'Elias told me a story once he'd been told when the Brotherhood were bringing him up. It was about when Eggman's ancestor, Brutus Kintobor arrvied. The Guardian back then said that neither Kintobor or his kind should return to Angel Island. But his kind is. His family. His descendant. Try showing them this point of view. If it's personal, it might sway them our way a little.'

'Tails, you've been amazing these past few months. You deserve a break. Tomorrow, for just an hour or two or however long you want, just be a kid. Play some games with Cosmo. It'd be good for the both of you.'

'Anything else I can take with me?'

'Nothing much. Although, there are these.'

Holly pulled out from the kit two gloves that looked like a pair of human hands. But there was something odd about them. The palms, for example, were

'Gloves made out of memory latex,' explained Holly. 'They have an added middle layer of impact-gel inside them to cushion blows you receive. They're also fire proof and heat resistant. Fairy fire fighters use entire suits made out of this stuff when looking for civilians inside burning buildings. You could punch a wall of solid steel wearing this stuff and your hand wouldn't even have a scrape. They're brilliant for fist-fights. Professional boxers even use them they work so well.'

'Handy,' admitted the manservant.

'Please tell me that gag wasn't intentional,' piped up Artemis. 'Anything for me?'

Holly tossed him a bottle.

'Fairy acid. Butler can take out any people, and you can use that on those robots.'

'Anything to drink, sir?'

'Yes. Err... Do you have a rum and coke?'

'Yes, sir.'

'I'll have one of those without the rum in.'

'So... Just coke then?'

'Well, yes. I suppose you're right. I've been ordering those wrong for years.'

'What was that about?'

'I was acting stupid, Artemis.'

'Well that much was obvious,' the Irish youth commented irksomely.

'The latest infiltration techniques show that people tend to let their guard down when around someone who they think can't threaten them,' explained the manservant. 'Thus, I act stupid so it seems I am a complete imbecile so I won't arouse suspicion.'

'But you are acting like a maniac who will be arousing men in white coats with butterfly nets. Stop it at once.'

Mogul was in his office sitting at his desk, throwing Oakmund cookies to Ixis Naugus tucked away in his basket in the corner when Coconuts came crashing in with the light on his head flashing.

'Mister Mogul! Mister Mogul!' he said urgently. 'The Crabmeat at the bar just saw this big human going for a gun when he got spooked by the laser blasts. He thinks it could be someone from G.U.N., sir.'

'Preposterous,' said Mogul. 'A representative of the Guardian Units of the Nation would bear knowledge of the satellite laser testing grounds, and would therefore remain calm in their presence. Unless they issued a consummate dilettante to observe me, which I find dubious. Even the humans are not that incompetent.'

Coconuts's headlight flashed again as he had an idea. Well, a new thought. But to the mechanical monkey it was an idea, and those did not come along very often.

'But it could be someone else, sir,' he said. 'There have been a lot of bounty hunters after you. What if this human is another one?'

'For once, Coconuts, your train of thought actually wields intellectual results. I shall deal with the depilated apes myself.'

'He's much more than an ape, sir. From how the Crabmeat described him, he's more of a gorilla.' Coconuts smiled. He'd said 'described'. He was picking up more and more big words from Mr. Mogul.

'Greetings, my human friends. I trust you are procuring an exuberant time at my petite establishment?' said the mammoth.

'Why, veritably,' said Artemis, eager to engage in a verbal battle. 'The amusement of the gamble is most joyous, the pabulum delectable and the entertainment meritorious. This entire establishment is to be exalted.'

In the LEP shuttle outside the casino, Holly turned on her translator.

'Ha ha! At last, an individual in possession of a vocabulary tantamount to mine. I have to resort to using the words of a commoner so these uneducated rubes can even comprehend me. But what of my decorum? I am Mammoth Mogul, manager and owner of this establishment. Do tell to as to your own identity?'

'Henry Adrian Stephen Wahl. Or H. Adrian S. Wahl as I'm often credited.' Artemis had used this alias several times to deliver papers in various archaeological magazines. Most recently he had submitted a lecture on Egyptian hieroglyphics to The Trowel regarding a mis-translation he'd discovered that could render everything learned from hieroglyphics as worthless. The ancient Egyptians had based their language on Gnommish, the fairy tongue, and according to Artemis's translation, what most archaeologists believed to be the tale of a powerful curse actually said, "To get to next lavatory, go two floors up and take a right at the third sarcophagus."

Typical, thought Artemis. No matter where you go, there's always some titchy idiot pointing a gun at you.

'Hey there, blondie,' said Rouge as she raised Hope out of stuper.

'Err... Yeah. What's the matter?' said the teenage prodigy.

'Nothing. Just wanted to know how our boys in black and red are?'

'Ohh... Shadow's at the medical ward getting checked on. And I think Omega's down the shooting range trying out the new weapons I installed,' said Hope, regaining her composure with every word. The girl had too much cheer in her to be gloomy for too long.

'More weapons? What did you give him this time?'

'I've been having trouble fitting weapons in his arms, so much that everything I've put in seems to have clogged them up,' explained Hope. 'How Eggman managed to place so many weapons in such a small space amazes me.'

'But you did manage to install more weapons?'

'A few. I managed to add an automatic rocket launcher in one arm and a regular one in the other, two energy cannons and four extra laser blasters on each arm surrounding his wrists. Those are all the weapons I could manage to get in his arms. So I fitted four plasma cannons in his chest, two small instantaneous flamethrowers on both sides of his pelvis, twin heat-seeking rockets mounted on his shoulder and a pair of laser shutters to match.'

'Laser shutters?'

'Yeah, they're basically guns with a laser beam continously firing, but a small shutter keeps spinning to block the laser every half of a second. It makes the laser fire in smaller amounts and'll be much more useful in tearing up enemies. I was also able to fit in a smaller monitor in Omega's arm and a keyboard, so you'll be able to contact headquarters. I had to make a new monitor the size of a compact mirror just to fit it all in. One last thing was a gun rack in his belly.'

'A gun rack?'

'Yeah. It can only store a couple of pistols and small machine guns. Rifles are a no-go. There's also enough room for some of your bombs. You could fit in three of your Stunning Grenades and ten of your new heart bombs.'

'You made new ones?'

Hope reached into her pocket and pulled out three pink hearts. They looked like they belonged on a teenager's necklace.

'Smaller package, same kind of explosion.'

'Despite the juvenile overlander's inexperience, her crasftmaship is impressive on a satisfactory level.'

Meanwhile, down at G.U.N.'s medical ward, Shadow the Hedgehog was lying inside a tube waiting for the doctor who'd been assigned to him. Shadow was an artificial lifeform created by man as a step closer to discovering the secret of immortality with the side-mission of serving as a weapon. He was what the government declared as the 'Ultimate Lifeform.'

He was a metre tall and covered in black and red fur with cold eyes of bright scarlet. His chest was covered in white fur like chest hair and he only wore red and white hover skates adorned with golden bands known as Inhibitor Rings with matching gloves also in white.

He'd been involved in a major battle recently and was currently awaiting treatment and a physcial examination. The latter was his first. G.U.N. had always wanted his make-up to be kept secret so it wouldn't fall into enemy hands, though it was unlikely anyone could get their hands on the chemicals neccessary to make him.

Shadow heard a swoosh from the room's only door as it retracted into the ceiling before closing again.

In that time a balding man with grey hair sticking out on both sides of his head walked in. He wore a lab coat and thick glasses perched on a large nose and had a grey moustache covering his mouth. His nametag read 'Dr. S. Madden.'

'So, how are you doing today?' he said in a high-pitched German accent. 'Any new pain developed since the original injuries?'

Shadow shook his head.

'Ah yes. Lionel said you weren't much of a talker. No need to worry. My wife says I can talk enough for an entire room of people when my own work comes up. Probably why I'm not invited to many social gatherings.'

'What's the diagnosis, doc?' she asked.

'Well, he's suffered fourth degree burns, wounds similar to laser injuries, broken bones and according to his medical records, he's been declared dead once already. Apart from that, he seems fine.'

'The Commander wants you to take a weapon in case you're more tired out than you think.'

'I've got two weapons for you to try out. First one is this, the Shadow Rifle.'

Hope picked up a black gun with spikes on top reminiscent of Shadow's own spines. It was no bigger than an uzi.

'It runs on Chaos energy which it gets from you. When you pull the trigger, out comes a Chaos Spear.'

'I can already produce Chaos Spears,' said Shadow in his usual down-to-business tone.

'Yes. But the Shadow Rifle takes half the power you need to make them, then makes up for it so the Chaos Spears are twice as powerful. Two shots from this would be enough to take down a tank.'

Rouge nudged Omega. 'Looks like you might be getting replaced by something a little lighter.'

Omega stood stock still and stared at Rouge with blank red eyes. It was his version of glaring. But it was more annoying than intimidating.

'Next in line is this,' continued Hope, picking up a machine gun. 'What's special about this gun are the bullets. They're my vulcanised ceramics, which can-'

'I read the report,' butted in Shadow. 'They catch on fire when you shoot them and can burn through nearly anything.'

'That's right,' said Hope. 'They only stay hot for a second, but everyone knows bullets travel fast. You'll want to be close to your target for maximum effect. The gun barrel is coated with a gel I made. It's the only thing that can take the heat of the bullets so the gun doesn't melt in your hands. Holds two thirty round magazines.'

'Does it drive stick?'

'It's fueled up and ready to go. I left the keys in the ignition for you.'

Shadow hopped in the driver's seat.

'How fast can it go?' he asked.

'If you continuously boost, you can go up to five hundred miles per hour. So it should take you about six hours to get to New Mobotropolis if you don't slow down.'

Shadow thought this over for a second before an idea occurred to him.

'Omega's stationed on the back. If he activated his jet boosters, how fast would the car go?'

'A contribution from Omega's own boosters would be an increase of fifty miles per hour, making the travel time roughly...'

'Five hours, twenty-seven minutes and sixteen seconds,' blurted out Rouge. All eyes were on her now. 'What? Don't tell you all just thought I was a pretty face?'

Butler's gun hand drew his modified Neutrino 2000 faster than Mulch confronted with a bar of soap. He took aim at Nack and fired the Neutrino within a flash. This caught the weasel completely off guard and the beam stunned him before his eyes had time to widen.

Butler was about to fire on the Destructix when a metal hand grabbed him by his gun arm. It was a SWATbot in nothing but the top half of a black suit. The SWATbot pulled the Neutrino out of Butler's hand with surprising strength and threw it right across the room. The SWATbot then raised its arm and Butler could clearly see a building laser beam from the top of the robot's wrist.

'Surrender,' it said the utterings of a cheap radio.

Butler promptly batted the robot's arm aside and knocked its head clean off with one swift punch.

Drago threw a punch at Butler, but the bodyguard caught it easily and then pressed his thumb to a specific area of the neck that would render Drago unconscious. But the wolf was still standing.

Drago then attempted a spinning kick at Butler's chest, which was the highest point he could hope to reach. Butler blocked, then tried another pressure point, but still had no luck. The wolf's anatomy appeared to be different to that of a human. But Butler had one trump card that was guaranteed to work.

The Eurasian forced Drago back a few yards with a quick push, then the wolf came charging at him. Just before Drago was within Butler's striking distance, the bodyguard drew back his leg and threw a well aimed kick at the area underneath Drago's stomach. Paralysis due to excrutiating pain was immediate.

'Where'd you learn those moves from?' growled Sergeant Simian.

'My sensei.'

Butler then grabbed the gorilla and lifted him above his head and started spinning him with his hands. Once the Destructix member was dizzy enough, Butler grabbed him by the ammo belt slung across his chest and spun in a circle, building up momentum and let go before he lost his balance, sending the gorilla flying into Flying Frog and Lightning Lynx.

'That I learned from my sister,' said Butler once the room had stopped spinning.

Butler grabbed the dial of his watch and then tugged out a line of garrotte wire with a sound like dental floss being pulled from its container. He quickly made the wire into a loop and placed it around Sleuth's neck.

'Don't move, or your buddy gets it!'

The rest of the Destructix froze on the spot, while Artemis merely rolled his eyes at the clichéd statement. Don't move, or your buddy gets it! Honestly.

'You really do enjoy yourself too much on our little excursions,' Artemis commented drily.

'Just to be perfectly clear for you and your henchman, I shall use small words. For one thing, if you think that I am to believe that a common civilian could defeat six mercenaries on his own, then you greatly insult my intelligence. Now, I must give you my thanks for what you did. At the very least you saved the Chaos Emerald that gives me my power, but there is no big reward for you if that's what you're thinking.'

'A shame. But riches are not what I came here for. It is to gather information on a city called New Mobotropolis. And I think that is the least you could give me for saving your life.'

'What kind of idiot knows nothing about New Mobotropolis?'

'I am no idiot. I am just new here.'

'Everyone on this planet knows of New Mobotropolis.'

'I am new to this planet, in a manner of speaking. May we discuss this further in your office.'

'Perhaps. But do reveal the truth of your identity.'

'Artemis Fowl the Second, criminal mastermind.'

'OK. There's all you need on New Mobotropolis, my ancient friend. It's not everyday I meet someone older than myself. I must say, young Artemis, I like the cut of your jib. Perhaps you could help me with something, if you are as smart as you say you are.'

'Certainly. What is adventure without its challenges?'

'Good show, my friend! Now, I have been renting out casinos in this area to all those who can afford it for a cut of the winnings for every night.'

'That's the rental agreement, is it?'

'But of course. Anyway, an overlander from Station Square is trying to, shall we say, muscle in on my territory. So, I have decided to teach him a lesson by stealing his most prized possession, a rather ghastly piece of memorabelia from the Great War. A ring set with diamonds and sapphires stolen from a Mobian household. It was originally owned by the former queen herself. My adversary is very xenophobic toward my kind, and loves remnants of the Great War since it involved the killing of so many Mobians. The mere fact that he attributes me to these inferior beings is an insult in itself. It is kept safely locked up in the Bank of Station Square. I have deposited my own finances in there, along with a camera fitted with an X-ray filter hidden in a very large fraudulent gemstone. The vault is protected by a door of metre thick titanium with thirty tumblers. The exterior of the vault runs thermal scans every five minutes.'

'And it is impossible for any burglar to accomplish such a feet,' concluded Artemis. 'But don't tell me that's the only security.'

'Hardly. There are also the matters of the security cameras, motion sensors and laser grid. But I can handle those.'

'Do tell.'

'I have a team of computer hackers, some thirty of them, working on this problem.'

Artemis couldn't hold back his own surpise.

'Thirty?!' he exclaimed. 'How the devil can you keep them quiet?'

'They are a subterranean species of Mobian, who are mistrusting of many outside their kind. They are a cross breed of mole and lizard know as the Nerbs. They are rather sapless, but are excellent at working computers. My payment for them is Badniks to assist in excavating to expand their underground kingdom, and to mine for gold and precious gems. They care nothing for anyone on the surface that hasn't helped or financed them. But to the matter concerning you. The previous security measures I mentioned are all on different grids, and it takes ten Nerbs to deal with one of them.'

'And you're ten short to deal with the heat sensors.'

'Exactly.'

Artemis pulled a bottle out of his pocket. The one containing fairy acid.

'This is the most powerful acid in the world. It can eat through your vault door in less than five minutes, if you use all of it. All your thief has to do is spray this after the thermal scanners have done their routine check, grab the ring, and walk out. Problem solved. But one's word alone is not proof. Bring me one of your... Robots and I'll prove it to you.'

'None of them are made from titanium, nor are they nearly ten feet think. Though a certain three are as thick as ten short planks.'

'How about I offer you an advantage to your plan as good faith?' said Artemis. 'That way, even if your man gets caught, he'll be able to work with you for another day. It is a man, or am I mistaken?'

'It is a woman, not that is any of your concern.'

'In less than two days I'll be back twelve thousand years into the past. Information is power, so provide me with the power to help you.'

Mogul chuckled. This boy had a way of persuading a person. His tricks would work on any old dimwit for whatever he wanted, but if he asked for something big from someone smart, he'd be in a pickle. But still, this wasn't anything big.

'Her name is Rouge the Bat. She is a cat burglar who works part-time for the United Federation's defences in their espionage unit. She has the rare brains and skills for such a delicate operation. Usually I do not employ those working for my enemies, but Miss Bat is inclined to work for whoever she wants for the right price.'

'That's what you get for working with criminals. There's no honour among thieves these days.'

'Absolutely true. But I don't only deal in thieves.'

Artemis raised his guard a little at this. Thieves were the lowest threat in criminal circles compared to what else was out there. The only other major crime was murder, which spoke for itself.

'Butler, hand me the device I took from that young girl.'

'A thief that steals the proverbial candy from little more than babies,' pointed out Mogul.

Butler placed the gadget stolen from Hope Kintobor in Artemis's outstretched hand.

'A child prodigy that steals from a child prodigy,' retorted Artemis. 'In my opinion, the most effective plans are the ones with twists you don't see coming.'

Artemis turned on the Sunshine Ball and it filled the room with light and warmth.

'This contraption came from a United Federation mechanic,' explained Artemis. 'It produces light and heat. Connect it with a parachute and what have you got?'

'A miniature hot air balloon,' breathed Mogul, unbelieving of what had just dawned upon him.

'Exactly. A balloon shining in the night sky with your treasure attached, and the police in pursuit of Miss Bat. With one of your robot employees flying around to catch it, the ring will be as good as in yours.'

Mogul was astounded. For nothing, the perfect guarantee that the ring would be his was being handed to him for nothing. Or was it?

'Mister Mogul is particularly intelligent, though it is little surprise. If mammoth brains are any similar to those of elephants, then I should expect such mentality. As you know, old friend, elephants have the largest brains of all land animals and are on par with primates on the intellectual scale.'

'Urgh... You reckon that egg-head will still pay us for the job?'

'No way! And I'm not going back to find out. The last time we were alone with that maniac, we walked out as shiny and metal as my coffee pot!'

'Yo, Sal! I'm taking a shower here!'

'What are you worried about? Everyone you've met knows what you look like naked. Listen, just hurry up. We've got guests to greet.'

'Hey, I rush a lot of things, but when it comes to my quills, it's got to be handled delicately. It wouldn't do for Mobius's main hero to look like he doesn't care about himself.'

Sally let out a genuine laugh at this. 'You, not care about yourself? I don't think anyone's going to get that impression with your attitude.'

'Hardy-har-har. Very funny.'

'Just be out in five minutes.'

'Sorry, but this is going to take at least ten.'

Sally calmly walked out of the bathroom and went down into the kitchen, filling up a pan of ice cold water. She went back to the bathroom and poured it on to the floor of the shower. Sonic's feet moved faster than they ever had before as they tried to avoid the cold.

Then Sally turned the shower off while he was distracted and threw Sonic a towel.

'You know, despite everything they say, marriage does have its quirks!'

Rouge touched up her make-up in the passenger seat.

While Shadow drove through the wide open space, he listened to the news reports from Station Square being broadcast on the seven by ten inch television installed underneath the dash. It currently showed an anchor woman in a blue suit with blonde hair. The name underneath read Susan Baxter.

'Our top stories today begin with yesterday's defeat of a Mobian echidna by the name of Doctor Finitevus, who set out on a quest of destruction to rid Mobius of nearly all life except for his followers,' said Susan. 'But thanks to the efforts of Station Square's own Team Dark, members of the Brotherhood of Guardians, Chaotix and Knothole Freedom Fighters this crisis was averted. Doctor Finitevus has since been handed over to the Republic of Acorn and is awaiting trial. For our next big story, we go to Scarlet Garcia outside of GUN Base 56.'

The picture switched to a redheaded woman wearing an orange dress suit carrying a microphone.

'Thank you, Susan,' said Scarlet. 'Late last night after the events involving Finitevus ended, G.U.N.'s own base stationed right here in Station Square Central was infiltated by a group rumours say could be spies from the Eggman Empire. Apparently a mechanic working late was held at gun-point throughout the ordeal after he stumbled across the intruders.'

' She stumbled across the intruders,' corrected Rouge after applying another layer of Luscious Lip.

'Apparently they brought with them some sort of advanced battle robot that took out an entire battalion of G.U.N. and three mechanical pilot-operated walker machines,' continued Scarlet. 'There appears to be no unrecoverable injury though. This is Scarlet Garcia signing off, and reminding you all to catch my new show Station Square Today tonight at seven.'

Susan Baxter gave an unintentional discouraging look to the camera before covering it up with a celebrity smile.

'Plug what you can when you can,' remarked Rouge.

Copies of the Artemis Fowl books and Sonic the Hedgehog's latest video games are in stores now! For the Sonic the Hedgehog comic book, see your nearest comic book store or visit an online shop.

'In other news, President Theodore Hughbert is now up against some pretty big competition in the race for his re-election,' continued the reporter.

The screen then changed to a ralley in a busy square with a large man if his fifties waving to the crowd with his assistant and chief campaign planner.

'You are now seeing pictures being taken at a "Vote for Michael Rowling" rally. Mister Rowling's campaign has been gaining strength since his latest act was to guarantee more jobs by placing Thorndyke Industries, the largest employing company in the United Federation, in control of all large businesses and giving benefits to smaller establishments. In celebrity news, newlyweds Princess Sally Acorn of the Republic of Acorn and world-renowned hero Sonic the Hedgehog return from their honey-'

Shadow turned it off there, deciding nothing else was worth hearing if they'd move on to the celebrities.

'What's with the car?' Sally asked Shadow.

'New G.U.N. make. It's a battle vehicle with strong armour and twin missile launchers on the sides. We're testing it in fake war zones right now, but we'll be giving it a trial run for car chasing at the Station Square Annual Motor Derby next week.'

'Oh yeah. Rotor said he was going to try out something of his own there too. Now that I think about it, Amy was also talking about the race. But hey, A five thousand credit prize is a hard thing to pass up.'

'I guess. We only get to keep half of the money if we win, which we'll split between us. The other half goes to G.U.N. to help with the war effort.'

'Nice to see you're thinking about others.'

'Ha!' piped up Rouge. 'We have to donate half of the money if we want to use the car. I'd spend it all on this diamond necklace I've got my eyes on if I had it.'

Shadow just shook his head with the ghost of an amused smile on his face. 'Some things never change...'

'Age before beauty,' said Rouge curtly to Shadow.

Shadow then went first and he and Rouge followed the princess inside without a problem, but Omega was too big to get through the door.

'Oh, sorry, Omega. We made the entrances smaller so that Mobians could get in, but not any of Eggman's robots,' explained Sally.

'You really are taking every little precaution,' noted Rouge. 'Making the doors smaller. You must have been thinking of everything that Eggman could dish out and how to stop it.'

'I have. But once we've finished here, a small door will be the last thing that amazes you. Come on, you two.'

'Hang on,' said Shadow in his usual grumpy demeanor. 'Omega, please give me your arm,' the hedgehog instructed, clutching Omega's arm by the thin part attaching the arm to Omega's shoulder. The arm was then released with a pneumatic hiss and Shadow caught it in his hand before it dropped to the floor.

'Omega's arms can be detached from his body,' Shadow explained, a touch unnecessarily. 'You can then carry the arms around as your own personal weapons. If you have the strength, of course. You just twist the spikes on the wrist to switch between weapons and to fire.'

'That's the second time I've been reduced to so much charcoal in twenty-four hours!'

CHAPTER 11: OPALS AND EMERALDS
'OK, guys,' said Sally. 'Here's our mission. Two nights ago when Sonic and I were on our honeymoon, NICOLE sent out some spy-eyes to check up on Eggman, and she found some things that I'm concerned about.'

Spy-eyes was the term the Freedom Fighters used for the hovering nanite-powered cameras NICOLE had made. They were based on designs made by Robotnik Prime that NICOLE had found on previous adventures with the Freedom Fighters. She had discovered blue-prints Robotnik had made for devices called Surveillance Orbs but never put them into production and saved them. After New Mobotropolis was created, NICOLE had decided to make her own version of the Surveillance Orbs using nanites as power-sources.

'The spy-eyes went to Eggman's Iron Jungle base above Eggman's underground factory called the Lava Shelter, only to find that the facility has grown significantly and is being called the Egg Factory,' continued Sally. 'In just two weeks, Eggman has used the Egg Factory to make more robots and build a new city called Metropolis and the Iron Jungle now acts as a sort of defensive network for the Egg Factory. You have to get through Iron Jungle and all the robot guards to get to the factory. This place is making 'bots by the minute. NICOLE's spy-eyes saw them being spewed out faster than you could believe. This means his robot-creating machines have become much more faster and efficient, and he could probably have an army ready to take over the entire planet within days.'

This part caught everybody's attention, especially Opal's.

'What is even scarier is that one of the spy-eyes caught Eggman putting in plans for another one of his battle mechs. All he did was put in the blueprints he'd made, and within minutes the thing was complete. The mech was called the Egg Mastodon and we know little of its abilities, but you can be sure Eggman will put it to use soon. We've got to destroy the Egg Factory at any cost.'

Rouge raised a hand in question. 'Princess, would you care to explain just how the creation of an entire city went unnoticed?' she asked. 'I haven't heard anything about this, and G.U.N.'s satellites would have picked it up.'

'I have no idea how he managed to keep this a secret. I can only guess he used some sort of cloaking technology. Maybe Eggman made a force-field that could bend light so we couldn't see it with the naked eye or satellite. I guess we just got lucky with NICOLE's probes. The Council of Acorn is fully behind us on this one, so we don't have to worry about any trouble from them. They want this place destroyed as much as we do.'

'Don't you think Buler should sit this one out? He's had a it rough for the past two days without a decent rest. You're a bit of a slave-driver, you know, Artemis.'

'Butler is the most competent and reliable in the battlefield, with you coming in close behind. Besides, Butler doesn't think I'm a slave-driver. Do you, old friend?'

Just as the manservant was about to open his mouth, Holly butted in.

'Tell the truth, Butler, or I'll mesmer it out of you!'

Feeling trapped, Butler took a deep breath before qietly singing to himself and into his partners' ears.

'Swing low, sweet chariot. Coming for to carry me home!'

Holly almost burst out laughing.

Artemis became slightly annoyed and decided to take the higher ground. 'Very informal of you, Butler. But for the duration of the mission, try not to get wrapped up in your new job as comedian and cause a scene that will blow our cover.'

Butler coughed his affirmative. Artemis was right. That was most unprofessional. Though amusing.

Butler then walked up to him and bumped into the crocodile with his shoulder.

'Why don't you watch where you're going?' Butler yelled.

'Hey, you're the one that bumped into me, Gramps!' said Vector.

'You're the one that bumped into me, you over-grown handbag!'

'Watch it, buddy, or I'll put your head between my jaws and bite down. Hard!'

'Oh! Does the croc' with the big mouth want a fight?' Butler was getting Vector so worked up that Foaly would have been proud had he been there to witness it.

'That's it! You're going down, pal!'

'OK. I always did want to Crocodile Wrestle,' said Butler and removed his trench coat, revealing a chest rivaling Mammoth Mogul's. 'Come on, scale-face. My sister's birthday's coming up, and I want to give her a pair of crocodile-skin shoes as a present.'

Vector had had enough, and charged at Butler, as did the Eurasian so that they were soon locked in a battle of strength. Each trying to overpower the other. Soon there were mobians, overlanders and humans of all kinds placing bets on the crocodile and manservant for who would win. A couple of "Mes Braves" Battalion soldiers saw all the commotion and considered stopping it, but who was going to get in the way of an over two-metre tall human and a near six-foot crocodile who both had chests roughly the size of houses?

'Get him!' screeched Opal to Sonic, and the hedgehog complied.

He moved with amazing speed, but Butler's reflexes were much faster than a normal man's thanks to his extensive magical healing. He used this advantage and the memory latex gloves to grab Sonic while he was in the middle of his spinball move, and threw the hedgehog hard into the ground.

The D'Coolettes Bunnie and Antoine, the recently married couple consisting of a southern cyborg rabbit cowgirl and a French coyote swordsman, charged at Butler while Sally ran to the Chaos Emerald Chamber with Opal.

Butler raced after them.

Bunnie used the jets installed in the bottoms of her robot feet to fly straight towards him, but Butler was prepared. His Neutrino came up and blasting, knocking her out cold and disabling her rockets. The rabbit girl's momentum still kept sending her towards Butler and the manservant had to grab her with one arm to avoid injury to either of them.

Antoine became enraged by this and brought out his sword. Butler fired a single shot, but Antoine's sword deflected it, amazingly enough. Butler tried again, this time firing three shots too fast for the coyote to deflect. He went down, and Butler wrenched open a door to a nearby house, throwing them both inside before placing the door back where it was and running for the Chaos Emerald Chamber.

No doubt Mulch could handle the situation from here, but it was always good to have back up.

Holly used the filters on her helmet to zoom in on the outside wall of the chamber, and then ran a scan.

'Nanites,' she finally said. 'This entire city's made out of tiny robots. Maybe I can short-circuit them.'

Holly drew her Neutrino and fired dead centre. Fiery ripples of neutrino charge flew through the wall, disabling the tiny machines as they went.

'Now we can get through. We'll have to use some sort of small explosion or something to remove the nanites, though.'

'I've got a better idea,' said Butler, and took a few steps back before charging through the wall.

Standing in front of Opal was the girl from outside, her stance fearless. But Butler could see through the mesmer and into her eyes. He'd seen that look before on a black ops mission during Desert Storm. He'd been assigned a young soldier as his partner to help him sneak through to behind enemy lines. She was scared deep down, but hiding it behind a brave face and determination. One good strike against her or her people would completely shatter her, sending her into an emotional breakdown. Perhaps losing Opal would cause such a thing...

Butler shook away this line of thought and resolved to scold himself later. This was ridiculous. Part of a bodyguard's job to make sacrifices for what was more important. At any rate, the girl was not thinking straight, and if Opal let go of her, she'd probably have absolutely no recollection of what had happened. Though he'd remembered everything the last time he was under Opal's mesmer.

'Fowl!' screeched Opal and shot a blast of lightning at her hated enemy. But he simply vanished.

Opal blinked in confusion, then she heard a whistle and saw Artemis on the steps of Castle Acorn. She threw a sphere of fire this time, but all she did was mark the stone steps.

She heard the same whistle, and now three Artemis Fowls stood behind. And another five on top of a building. Then even more all around her. There were Fowls by the dozen.

'Sally!' exclaimed NICOLE. 'Someone's hacked into my hologram matrix.'

Opal overheard this, and Artemis's intentions became apparent to her.

She smiled maliciously. 'Very cute, Fowl. Very clever. Using holograms to get me to waste my power. But I'm smarter than you, and you know it! My power cannot be drained so easily!'

A man rose up from the cockpit, though his appearance was bearing on inhuman. His disfigured body was just over six foot tall, a dome-shaped head resting in the middle of twin broad shoulders. His stomach was so large it was like looking at the base of an egg, but his limbs differed considerably, being long and skinny. His legs were nothing but bone wrapped in muscle and flesh, no fat whatsoever. His arms were long and equally thin, ending in dexterous hands large enough to fit over a man's head, and his face was nothing but an enormous manical smile, with a large pink nose above, and the largest moustache you're ever likely to see resting in the middle.

His clothing consisted of black, tight-fitting spandex-like pants reaching up to over his vast stomach and matching boots with an odd pattern of iron plates where the laces should be. He wore a red coat with tails with gold button decoration adorned with white stripes stretching from front to back, and similar sliced up stripes going up his arms and chest. The sleeves of the coat ended in yolk yellow cuffs, and beyond them were white gloves covering his hands. Atop his head were a pair of work goggles and resting on his nose was a pair of dark blue pince nez glasses, hiding his eyes from the world.

Butler fired a few charges from his modified Neutrino 2000 on the nearest Eggman robot, and it began to spark upon impact as the charge made its way through the robot's body and fried all its inner circuitry.

Apparently, Butler thought, Eggamantium conducts neutrino charges. Perhaps my luck is changing. Then another Eggman robot sneaked up to him and charged at him and Butler was flung from his feet by the force of the blow. Nope. Still bad as ever.

'Mastodons now, eh? Latest model in the Eggman fashion line?' Sonic quipped. 'Why not make something more appropriate? Like an Egg Cockroach so I can really squash it.'

'Heed to my will, mortal', said Opal in the hypnotic mesmer. 'Destroy the humans! Squash them like the bugs they are to me!'

Eggman looked stumped for a moment, before letting out an echoing guffaw.

'Bwa ha ha! Oh, oh... You're a laugh riot, kid,' he said, wiping an imaginary tear away. 'Now where was I? Oh yes. DEATH TO YOU RODENT!!'

Butler quickly moved between the buildings for cover, and when he was close enough, ran straight for the armed buggy Team Dark had come in and jumped into it. He didn't even need to hot-wire the car. The keys were still in the ignition.

Butler floored the accelerator and the car zoomed off towards the Egg Mammoth with surprising speed.

The buggy was armed with twin missile launchers for these kinds of situations, but Butler didn't know this. He did, however, spot a red button with the word 'boost' on the gear stick, and pressed it when he was only two metres away from the Egg Mastodon and jumped out of the car.

The force of the car ramming into the mech caused the Egg Mastodon to lose its balance and topple over onto the ground, shaking the earth on impact.

Butler then walked over, yanked Eggman out of the cockpit and behind the overturned Egg Mastodon to give them both some cover from Opal.

Eggman surreptitiously activated his glasses' sytems by caressing their rims. The dictator then issued a series of blinks, flitting through the various filters until he finally came across the power level analyser and disgnostic settings. As he observed the data, Eggman let out a vicious smile tinted with the genius's madness. This little girl had enough power in her body to run an army of Egg Fighters. Shame all the working Egg Grapes were occupied at the moment. He'd have to dump some of the contents into the lava of his Egg Factory to make room.

Eggman ran over to the Egg Mastodon's cockpit and pulled out two very large guns perfectly suited for his shovel-sized hands. They were mainly grey and red, with yellow and black hazard lines right before the barrel. These were Eggman's twin Egg Boomers, so named because everything they were shot at went boom.

Eggman ripped off the head of an Egg Fighter and shoved a grenade in the new hole and quickly ducked for cover. The grenade went off inside the robot's body and shrapnel was sent everywhere, forcing people to hide behind whatever they could or be fatally injured.

'Don't worry, rodent! I won't just up and kill you. I've got something special planned for a hero of your caliber.'

Eggman then did a run for the Egg Mobile and jumped into it with a 'Yosh!'

'I caught the little Freedom Fighter! Ha ha ha ha!'

'Ah-ah-ah! Chase after me, Sonic, and I'll set this ship to go as fast as you can. You're little friend wouldn't look the same with his face stretched to ripping off his face by g-force.'

Something seemed off to the hedgehog, though. The face's various expressions between speaking seemed genuine, but the boy's body was completely still. Sonic was right to notice this. The computer hologram system aboard the shuttle added bodies to faces, so people could sit in their seats with the bodies they'd assigned themselves from a list of images and talk to others in comfort. Once, Commander Kelp had accidentally posted a hologram of himself with a bikini model's body when conversing to the Council. His cheeks had stayed red for a week.

'Wait!' said Sonic. 'Who are you?'

The mysterious boy turned to face him in a most eery fashion. Almost as if he had glided across the ground. 'I am Artemis Fowl the Second.'

Sonic shrugged. 'I've never heard of you before.'

The boy showed an amused smile across his face. 'So much for an artist being better appreciated outside his own time.' And with that, he vanished.

A new arm appeared out of the side of the Egg Mobile, but instead of ending in a three-fingered claw, it was a machine gun.

Bullets went flying and struck the Tornado's engine, sending up black smoke.

Sally looked up, but saw nothing. It seemed as if the clamps had appeared from thin air. In reality, Artemis had chased after Eggman and Opal, but when he saw Sally in danger, he aborted his mission and fired the ship's magnetic docker clamps at the wings of the Tornado. Now all Sally had to do was climb on them and Artemis could release the ship's magnetic grip on the plane.

Eggman flicked through the various projects shown before him by swishing them aside with his hand.

The holograms worked on a series of light projectors being reflected of a non-lethal gas that was otherwise invisible and motion sensors that detected the hand gestures and registered them as commands.

When he was finished looking over his projects, Eggman sighed and leaned back in his seat, allowing the gentle rush of the warm air to fly through his moustache.

His empire was getting harder and harder to keep hold of. All his enforcements were at the ready to betray him the moment he lost power so they could rule the world. One of them was his personal lackey, but it did liven things up a bit.

Despite all this distressing information, Eggman had smile to himself, his maniacal grin a sight that would have asylum workers breaking out the straight jackets.

His plan was working. His defeat at New Megaopolis had been inevitable, but all he had to do was bide his time until he could escape prison. When the opportunity came, he started building machines of mass destruction again. For a month, the people of Mobius thought the war was over and breathed easy, finally relaxing. Now Eggman was back on the loose, ready to wage another global battle. And they would be ready for him. All according to plan.

They will want me stopped, and will fight back to do so, the mad but brilliant dictator thought. A new war will begin, this time with more casualties. That'll dampen the rodent's spirits, knowing that all around the world people are dying because of me and even he isn't fast enough to protect all of them. With his friends and allies dropping like flies day after day, he shall soon be at his breaking point. Then I can launch the final strike. Then I can defeat him, and the planet will be mine! A whole planet of robots and slaves to serve as my soldiers. There is so much more out there to conquer. Beyond the stars! I shall rule... everything.

CHAPTER 12: OMNIPOTENT OPAL
Two mintutes later, NICOLE finished her search and reported in. 'Sally, I have completed my assignment. At first, I could find nothing on Artemis Fowl. Then I ran a deep search and I came across a very old public-access database written in an unknown language, but I was able to get a rough translation, and from there what I found was amazing. According to my findings, the database was last updateed roughly 12,000 years ago and was used by an organisation known as the Lower Elements Police. Fowl was on a criminal profile.'

'So Fowl's a crook?' asked Rouge, ignoring this awing piece of information.

'Was. This database last reports him as a successful CEO of his own company, Fowl Entreprises. I found data on everyone else we saw with him as well. I am posting a display for you now.'

Soon, profiles for the five mysterious beings flashed on the screen, and Sally began to skim through. NICOLE had obligingly highlighted some of the more important bits.

Rouge got tired of waiting for the reveal after about two minutes. 'So? What's it say?'

'Basically, everybody Fowl is associated with has the potential to take us down for good,' said Sally.

'Pish. We can down any old bad guys.'

'You would be right, except these are the good guys. Fowl allied himself with these strange creatures as did his bodyguard, Butler. They've hunted down and stopped many major threats all within the span of fifty years.'

'Well that's nothing special. Compared to our track record at least.'

'True. But these methods... This Fowl kid is a complete genius. No two ways about it. He's like Mammoth Mogul, but still in his teens. It says here that he also served as a general during a conflict known as World War III. An... Iranian anarchist working as a scientist for a nuclear weapons facility launched a single missile into the heart of a country called... How do you pronounce that? Roossia? Or maybe Rush-a? Anyway, the missile killed a total of seven million people in the initial blast. Then these other two countries England and America joined forces to mount a sabotage mission so all other missiles would be inoperative in case they were attacked next. The Iranians were still making investigations, and this led to war that spanned through six other countries, and two continents. The conflict lasted two years, and in that time, Fowl joined the military while undergoing secret investigations of his own into the incident that started it all by deploying his bodyguard into the country. After a year and a half, they got proof that the missile attack was not related to the government as rumours had circulated, and six months later the authorities there confirmed it, and the war was over.'

'But we're dealing with him before all this?'

'Yeah. Possibly. There are many alternate futures on Mobius, the same could be said all those years back. And I'm looking over these tactics he thought up and... This Artemis Fowl is really a genius. And in multiple fields. He's got degrees and doctorates of almost every kind. He's won awards for his work. It's all so incredible. I mean, he must have somehow figured out a way to travel through time to capture this Opal character when Power Rings and the technology that existed today was all fiction.'

'I have more information regarding Opal Koboi and Fowl's pursuit of her,' said NICOLE, rejoining the conversation. 'The night you found her, soldiers reported sighting a man chasing a little girl through the streets of Soleanna. I hacked into the city's security network, viewed recordings from their surviellance cameras and made an X-ray analysis of the man to confirm his bone structure and height. I compared it to the statistics taken from the profile I discovered, and the man was Artemis Fowl's bodyguard, known only as Butler. There is gygabytes of data about this man, mainly detailing operations he has been involved in, his skills and training. This man is like the ultimate super soldier. There is also a video file showing him do battle with a vicious creature identified as a troll. Shall I display?'

'Please, NICOLE.'

A holographic orb of green light was cast up by the sentient computer, and at its heart displayed Butler battling a creature Sally could only have dreamed up in her worst nightmares. The human fought it using a mace and suit of armour and amazingly emerged victorious after shooting the creature and finally going against it with his gauntleted hands.

'You've got to be kidding me,' said Rouge. 'There's no way this guy's human.'

'I also checked the G.U.N. security files after you said Artemis Fowl matched the description Hope Kintobor gave of the intruder in your base. X-ray scan confirms the man with him was Butler. I made a comparison of their skeletal structures and came up with ninety nine point six per cent match. It seems Butler sustained some injuries to his bones that were healed at an amazing rate.'

'You're telling me a human took down Sigma-Alpha 2, three G.U.N. Walkers, some of the most powerful Mobians on the planet and a troop of Eggman robots. Can humans do that? Or did they just lose it a few milleniums down the line?'

'No. Butler is classified as uniquely skilled and dangerous and surveillance files list him as being able to backlift a maximum amount of four thousand, seven hundred and fifty pounds. This combined with the powers of these creatures and Artemis Fowl's genius has made them virtually unbeatable.'

'Well,' said Sally, trying to lift their spirits. 'At least they're on our side.'

'Are they?' said Rouge, lowering them deep enough to nestle with dinosaur bones.

'One joke about women drivers, Sonic, and I'll reduce you to a blue smear on the wheel.'

'Keep driving like that and it'll happen anyway.'

'Could you tell me just what these guys are capable of?'

'Certainly, Holly. Some closed files I hacked into should provide all the information necessary. Let's see. First off we have Princess Sally Alicia Acorn. She has impressive martial arts skill for her age, and according to this she has quite the tactical mind. Nothing quite as impressive as yours truly, of course, but it has to be said that plans like these made so quickly aren't without merit.'

'So she's the head.'

'Yes. Next in line is one Sonic the Hedgehog, thought of as quite the hero, having saved Mobius many times during his exploits. A number of which he did have assistance with, though. Physical capabilites include super speed, impressive combat ability, though amateuristic, and he can withstand considerable damage. Though, according to this, it's not surprising. It says here he can surpass speed of mach one, and I've seen him come close to this. If a body can withstand travelling that great a speed, heaven knows would kind of physical damage he could take.'

'Can deal it fast and can take it too. Noted. Next.'

'Shadow the Hedgehog. Initially thought to be a bio-weapon made from only altered Mobian DNA, it was revealed blood from an actual extraterrestrial was used to give him the ability to manipulate some sort of energy called the Chaos Force. He's been alive fifty years and was trained in weapons' usage, vehicle controls and combat from high-ranking military.'

Holly blinked in amazement. 'This list isn't going to get any better, is it?'

'Don't worry, Holly. We haven't made them our foes, yet. And Mobians seem to be peaceful. But moving on, next in line is a preteen mechanical genius called Miles Prower, otherwise known as Tails. He can fly using his twin tails and is also an accomplished pilot and inventor. He was the one who was kidnapped. After this comes Rouge the Bat, a professional thief with considerable strength in her legs and a combat style similar to ninjitsu accompanied with espionage training. She could be a better thief than Mulch, and that is truly an accomplishment.'

Mulch nodded graciously at the compliment while wondering if he'd been simultaneously insulted.

'The only one left is a robot named E-123 Omega, who is nothing more than the world's most advanced tank on legs. His artillery is greater than most armies, and he keeps it stored all within his upper body. Now to our hostile. Doctor Eggman, aka Doctor Ivo Robotnik, real name Julian Kintobor of the House of Ivo. It says he that comes from an alternate dimension and fills the gap left by this world's Doctor Robotnik after he died. He underwent a process known as roboticization to turn his body from organic to metal, making him a robot with the mind of a genius. He became invincible for a short time, being able to escape circumstanes were anyone else would have died thanks to his robotic bodies. The roboticization process was reverted by an alien species known as the Bem, so now he is organic again. He has an intelligence quotient of three hundred, and the ability to create schemes of immense proportions using a robotic army and currently controls most of the planet. We're dealing with Hitler in spandex and a ringmaster's coat.'

'Seen this one in a Bond movie, big man?' asked Holly.

'Bond movie? I haven't even seen anything like this in Star Wars.'

'Butler', called Artemis with a touch of excitement in his voice. 'You must see this. The DNA analysis shows that these "Mobians" are a mixture of human and animal DNA merged together. These creatures are mutant beings, hybrids of homosapien and almost all creatures lower on the intellectual scale. They've even come further than humans in some areas, like technology. They have each created devices superior to humankind's own.'

'That's all well and good, Artemis,' said Holly from the front of the ship. 'But right now Opal Koboi is running off with a self-absorbed dictator bent on world domination.'

'A match made in heaven if there ever was one,' Artemis commented drily. His sense of humour had the aggravating habit of coming to the fore whenever the situation was at its most stressful.

Dr. Eggman sat in the main laboratory of the Egg Factory with Opal, looking over the new robot just manufactured. Its skinny body was covered from top to bottom in white and black armour, and had a head shaped like a Frisbee with a single optic eye. Its armaments consisted of a missile launcher on its right arm and a machine gun on the left. It also came with a jet engine in its back for hovering. Eggman couldn't help but admire the handiwork and great craftsmanship of the design, and this was only one of four models.

'I must say, Miss Koboi,' said Eggman, 'these new modifications to my Egg Gunner designs are brilliant. And you made the perfect models for my Egg Rollers idea in no time at all. You're an evil genius after my own heart. And I must also thank you for your contribution to my little side-project.'

'The new design is rather splendid, but the SCR-GPs are nothing to fret about,' said Opal while filing her nails. 'Their ingenuity is no greater than their name of Egg Rollers compared to my designs for your Operation: Eggstermination. But there's no chance of that plan working unless you get the other necessities.'

'Don't you worry about them,' said Eggman with an air of nefarious cunning and malice. 'My Egg Cruiser will soon be ready and I can collect the Destructicite crystals from Mobius's asteroid belt. With them, Operation: Eggstermination can't fail. The Eggman Empire will be all powerful again, and I shall rule it all from right here in Metropolis. I think I shall destroy one of the continents when that happens, build a new glorious vast city from the ashes and christen it Egg Capital as a gift for myself. Or better yet, ha ha ha, pave over the entire world and turn it into the Egg Planet. My own glorious world with an all-powerful army of robots serving my every whim with that hedgehog behind bars, living for the sole purpose of giving me entertainment by being tortured or humiliated whenever world domination starts getting tedious.'

Opal smiled an evil smile at the Doctor's view of the future. He may be deranged, but his ideas and future schemes were so deliciously good that she herself could have thought of them. And when she got back to her world and conquered it, she would make it seem that she did think of them.

Snively took that moment to walk in and deliver some news to his adoptive uncle.

'Sir, satellites show that something is heading towards Metropolis at high speed. It must be the Hedgehog and his friends, sir.'

'Now, now, incompetent lackey,' said Opal in a voice as if talking to a disobedient child. 'It is ma'am and sir now that I am here with your uncle.'

'Ooh... I'd like to give you such a whack you witch!' muttered Snively to himself as he walked away.

'What was that!?' said Opal, furious.

'I said "I think on my back, there's an itch",' said Snively and proceeded to try and scratch himself in a place he'd never been able to reach.

'Long time no see, rodent! What do you think of these brilliant new robots Miss Koboi designed?' Eggman asked. 'Their inner-workings are absolutely spectacular! Their armour is made of a newly discovered metal found by my grand empire known as Eggamantium; The strongest metal on Mobius. And let's not forget the best part about these babies; They have such great computing and battle situation protocols that they make your wife's NICOLE look like a pocket calculator. They're smart, smart enough to out-think you and your little band of renegades with the utmost precision, Sonic.'

'We'll see about that, Eggman!' said Sonic, tauntingly. 'Your new hardware's smart enough, but let's see if they're fast enough.'

Sonic zoomed off, leaving his friends to their own fights. He moved at supersonic speed through the city of Metropolis, being careful to avoid rivers of acid and patrolling robots. The Egg Gunners followed with their jets at full speed and they're guns working at maximum power. It was already pain-stakingly obvious that Sonic was faster than them.

Sonic ran up to a wall and jumped on to it, then sprung right back off, causing the robots to slam into the solid wall at full speed and explode. If they had been going slower, they might have been able to pull up, but Sonic had made sure to make them go at maximum speed for his plan to work.

'You were saying about your robots being smart, doc?' said Sonic with his trademark grin.

Eggman let out a burst of hysterical laughter. 'Don't get cocky yet, my spiny friend. They weren't meant to catch you. They were meant to lure you in.'

Sonic bent his knees a little at this, ready to spring into action. His choice was a wise one, as in less than a second three white robots in the shape of wheels burst out from various buildings and were in hot pursuit of Sonic.

The hedgehog moved at high speed to avoid them, but these robots were fast. Incredibly fast, fast enough to catch Sonic.

One of them got to within a metre of Sonic, and it then transformed in mid-roll and then began to fly in order to stay close to the hedgehog. The robot had a single red eye that locked on to Sonic and large metal feet that were painted gold and had long. On other side of its chest were thin golden arms like pipes that ended in three black, metal fingers that reached out for Sonic.

Sonic turned around so he was running backwards, stuck out his tongue and pulled at his eye, making a very insulting face. The Egg Roller attempted to grab Sonic, but the hedgehog jumped out of grabbing distance and leaped on to the robot's head right in front of its eye.

The robot was now blinded and was trying desperately to grab Sonic. Its two comrades then transformed and went into hover mode to grab Sonic, but the hedgehog managed to avoid them. The two robots then climbed on to their comrade in order to capture Sonic, and that was when he put his plan into action.

Sonic jumped off of the Egg Roller with such force that it went face first into the ground, and then bounced back off of it again and again until if finally landed in a river of acid along with its comrades. The robots were devoured by the river of green acid within less than a minute.

'Launch the sonic missiles!' ordered Eggman.

'The hedgehog's out of the city limits, sir!' informed Snively. 'He's travelling at five miles per second.'

'Freedom Fighters, so called "heroes of Mobius," many times have we fought, and many battles have you won. By the mercy of your own Aurora, you won the war. The Second Robotnik War. But no longer do I go by the name of Robotnik. At that time, I was a bumbler. My ideas all too shrewd and my goals all too small. Today I am Eggman, leader of the Eggman Empire. My very own kingdom, which rules over most of this planet. I am now more successful than I ever was before. So, on this very day, a new war begins. The Eggman Onslaught. No more Robotnik. My former self is forgotten. In this new war, my armies will be deadlier. My ideas greater. My schemes grander! And my enemies...' Eggman's face was dominated by his maniacal smile as he heinously whispered, 'No more.'

Three Egg Rollers were flying in to provide back-up. Butler pulled out a metal sphere the size of a cricket ball, flicked back the safety cap, waited for five seconds, then threw it into a river of acid. Another five seconds later, what was left of the grenade exploded, and the contents of the river were sent flying into the air and enveloped the incoming Egg Rollers. Butler had taken advantage of the ten-second countdown so that it detonated just as the Egg Rollers were flying over the acid river.

'Allow me to introduce myself. I am Artemis Fowl II, former criminal mastermind and a being who shall haunt your worst and darkest nightmares for years to come,' said Artemis, and went into a small bow while simultaneously giving Eggman his best vampire-like smile.

'Ha ha ha! Look at these fools! Fighting, trying desperately to save the lives of their comrades. But why? Why are you doing any of this, knowing your fates are sealed?'

'Oh ho! You haven't told them yet, have you, Artemis? Creatures of the distant past, let me be the first to inform you that in fifty years' time, you die! The great Doctor Ivan Kintobor will capture a live specimen of an alien race known as the Xorda. He dissects the little squid and then comes the fireworks. The apocolypse! Armageddon! The end of the world as you know it.' Eggman turned to face Artemis's hologram. 'Tell me, little Arty. How long is left on the clock? You must have known about this, to keep the Xorda's attack hidden from your friends. You know what this means, don't you? Let me spell it out for you! Artemis Fowl the Second, hero of Earth and saviour of the fairy people, loses! His big brain for all it's worth cannot come up with the solution, and billions of his own kind die. Including him! Your mother, your father, your brothers, the little girl across the street from your house! All dead! All because the one person on the planet who could do something about it failed! The blood of mankind is on your hands, little Arty! And you're responsible for so much more! The creation of Mobians, overlanders, and even me! Yes, why me! If the Xorda had been stopped, I would probably never exist. Nor would all the other scum of this planet. And you know it, Arty! Your friends, your family. Everything your young eyes ever looked at, poof!'

The lip of the hologram Artemis trembled. His eyes watering. Father. Mother. Beckett. Myles. Butler. Mulch. Holly. Dead. His fault.

'And what about you? Why do you fight? You must have someone that is to die because of your master's failure? A brother? Mother? Father? Sister?'

'An emotional bodyguard! Oh, you are a shame to your cause! What would your ancestors say of you? Your own parents would disown you! Your sister would think you a disgrace! You shall die in shame!'

'I should have died years ago!' said Butler. 'But thanks to the fairies, I'm alive today. I've had more years to live than I was given. I'll do the same for them, so don't think this soldier is ready to give up yet, Fatso!'

'My mother told me something when I was young! When my grandmother was dying, she told me that anyone could die at any moment. You can't schedule when you die, or predict how you're going to. You must simply live every day like it is the last opportunity you have! I've seen my comrades fall beside me! And I realise just how right she was! So, the people of the world only have fifty years to live. Well that's fifty years I will fight for! Fifty years for them to accomplish their dreams. I'll keep fighting. And there is nothing you or that egg-shaped freaked can say to change my mind!'

Eggman lifted a large red and black gun with an unusually big scope with added mechanics so the filters wouldn't glitch. This was his custom-made EB-917 Blaster Rifle. He took aim briefly at Butler's leg through the scope and fired.

This activated the rifle's shutter laser, just like the one Hope had made for Omega. Except the young mechanical prodigy wasn't aware her "uncle" had had the same idea.

The shot of the laser actually split Butler's kneecap, and he went down like a bombarded rugby player.

'Surrender, girly! Before I'm forced to put a hole in you,' said Snively.

Girly? Holly wasn't about to take that, even if a gun was trained at her chest.

She shielded and it appeared to Snively as if the girl had vanished right before his eyes. The short overlander lowered his weapon while he pondered what he just saw, trying to make sense out of it. Big mistake. The little toady with the big nose received two invisible slaps on each cheek and one uppercut right to the jaw, sending him flying back on to the metallic ground. It'd take a few weeks to get rid of those bruises. And probably a few months before the Egg Workers stopped snickering behind his back.

'Sweet spark-plugs!' exclaimed Eggman.

'The next time you shoot someone dead in the chest, make sure they have a heart to shoot first.'

Omega, now firing bullets that expelled casings the size of soda cans, hefted Butler on his shoulder with his free arm and launched him into the LEP shuttle. Perhaps this should have been done a bit more gently, but it was either Butler in a little pain now, or Butler cremated in a little pot on the fireplace forever.

'I HATE THAT HEDGEHOG!'

'AND I HATE THAT HUMAN!'

Then, just as everyone relaxed, believing their troubles were over for the moment, Eggman appeared in front of their ship in his Egg Mobile.

In the aircraft's two arms was Opal's limp body, clutched tightly together.

Eggman stood tensed, facing them boldly. His fists clenched, and his expression unsettlingly neutral, going on terrifying.

Behind his glasses, a glow of red light appeared, shining brightly and menacingly.

Then, somehow, his glasses lost their dark hue, becoming completely clear, and showing them his eyes underneath. His red pupils burned brightly in the centre of pitch black scleras, like a red light shining from inside the darkest tunnel, basking them in its glow.

The strange phenomenon had then routed to their seats, completely paralysed in an unexplainable terror.

Finally the silence was broken, though everyone would have preferred if it hadn't been.

Eggman laughed a laugh of purest, darkest giddiness, the light shining from his eyes bouncing as his body shook from his complete gayety.

Then the cockpit of the Egg Mobile became engulfed within a dome of tinted glass, hiding Eggman from the rest of the world before flying back to Metropolis.

They all sat in their seats, wondering if Eggman had done something to fill him with such joy, or if he was just plain bonkers. But Artemis knew better.

He's laughing because he's found fresh meat, he realised. New opponents. New players in his war games. Things just got very complicated.

CHAPTER 13: FOWL AND THE FUTURE SAVIOURS
'Whatever choice I make, there will be a body count, and definite genocide. But with one there is infinitely more death.'

'Artemis, you're not making any sense.'

'If I stop the Xorda's attack, the creation of overlanders and Mobians will be stopped, thus erasing billions. If I let the Xorda destroy the world, humanity will survive, but will lose so many of its numbers. We are a violent race, and self-destructive. If we re-invent ourselves, there may be a chance. But I have no way of being sure. However, here, in this time-line, I can see them evolving. Going down a new path. We are still violent, but we don't cause as much damage, nor seek out to conquer each other. Humanity is at peace here, and they have two new species to help keep them on the right track. If I change this world's history, the outcome will likely result in Earth's own destruction, and humanity's. Either way, the result is the death of billions. So I will not interfere. I will not allow myself to be driven insane with the guilt of knowing I have wiped off men, women, children and people with the potential to do remarkable things. We will capture Opal and we will bring her back. Nothing else. There's... Nothing I can do. And you have no idea how much it hurts me to say that.'

'Butler here is my bodyguard. The Butlers have been protecting the Fowl family for centuries. All members of his family are either bodyguards or assassins.'

'Well, almost all, Artemis,' corrected Butler. 'My sister Juliet is a wrestler and I also have a cousin in America who is an artist who draws comic books for a living. My, it's been a long time since I last saw old Steven,' muttered Butler under his breath before drawing out of his past memories and back to the present.

'In a way, Metropolis's force field is powered atomically,' said Omega in his usual monotone voice.

'Atomically? How?'

'There is an electro-magnetic ring buried underground surrounding the city. The ring sends out an intense pulse of electro-magnetic energy.'

Artemis slapped his own forehead.

'Of course,' he said, the explanation of it all dawning on him. 'This shield doesn't appear from thin air. It is thin air. It's everything. Atoms exist within everything on this planet, even the air. Atoms are surrouned by a cloud of negatively charged electrons. If Eggman used this magnet to reverse the polarity of the electron cloud to positively charged, they would attract atoms nearby, forming a mass large enough to cover the city. It's genius. Completely ingenious. Everything on this planet is made of negatively charged atoms. Nothing could get through one of these shields.'

'But atoms can't be seen,' said Sally. 'They're too small to see unless you use an extremely powerful microscope. So why are they showing up blue? And how come we can see through it?'

'Excellent question. Brilliant question. And I have no idea what the answer is.'

Heads turned in unison to the Irish youth. Artemis expected smug looks to appear at any moment, so he put his brain into over-drive and thought up an explanation with plenty of holes in it based entirely on theory. He'd be great as a political adviser.

'Eggman's using a new energy source for his robots, correct?'

Sally nodded, wondering why Butler and every fairy still had the same look on their faces.

'Perhaps this electro-magnet doesn't run on electricity then, and what's powering it has the side-effect of causing the electron clouds surrounding the atoms to glow blue. So that answers that question. As for the transparency, it's possible some atoms are not being effected by the magnet, leaving billions of holes for us to see through and allow air to pass in. Just think of it like the world's largest, and at the same time smallest, security gate.'

Looks were stowed and minds were placed back on the job. No one had bothered listening to the jargon, but they all knew that whatever conclusion Artemis came to had a near one hundred per cent chance of being right.

Opal and Eggman sat at a long dining table in one of the more opulent rooms by electric candle-light. The dictator had dressed up for the celebration of his new army and was wearing a different version of his regular uniform. It had gold buttons in the shape of bottle caps instead of slabs and he had even managed to tame his straggly moustache with an Eggamantium comb dipped in motor oil.

Everything on their table was a food of Eggman's favourite, as he very rarely had guests. Every one of the dishes had Eggman's face on them and had the word "egg" in it.

There was the "Egg Dictator Sandwich", which was a foot long submarine sandwich with everything on it from sardines to pickled eggs. Then the was the "Egg-squisite Dinner", which was a plate of king prawns surrounded by fruits and vegetables that made it look like Eggman's face. Opal detected a slight hint of motor oil in the meal that made it far from "Egg-squisite". "Egg Dogs", which were hot dogs with a sickly green sauce on them. Then for desert there was "Egg Candy", which were huge lollipops with Eggman's face that tasted extremely bitter. Poppin' Eggcorn, which was basically popcorn that tasted like sawdust and finally Egg Puffs, which looked like large pieces of dough with the symbol of the Eggman Empire. Eggman had said it had a creamy filling, but what Opal found was a bitter and strange coloured gunk.

At each entrance to the dining room stood two blue robots with chests the shape of tea cups with lights on wielding a sword with spikes and a shield. These were Eggman's Egg Fighter robots that were supposed to form his new army, but had now been demoted to security duty and were now in charge of guarding Metropolis. Some of the more elite ones served as Eggman's personal bodyguards. Apparently, the Egg Fighters had saved Eggman from a group of cyborg echidnas armed with lasers and dressed in cloaks. Perhaps Eggman wasn't such an idiot after all if could actually made robots that could do their jobs well.

After finishing off an Egg Dictator Sandwich in three bites and downing a glass of Dr. Egger, Eggman addressed Opal.

'We will have to devise a new strategy to pulverise my enemies,' he said casually. 'The kidnapping won't work again and they won't fall into another trap by charging into the city after they've seen my new assault force. We shall have to create some sort of device strong enough to break through the energy field surrounding New Mobotropolis.'

'Why not use brute force again like last time?' Opal asked.

'Wouldn't work. It only succeeded the first time because of you, my dear. Your burst of magical energy upset the boundaries for a moment and let me crash through them. I had only intended to cause a bit of havoc outside the city until a Freedom Fighter came along to fight me off so I could distract them from their inevitable attempt to destroy my Egg Factory.'

Opal nodded. It made sense. 'What about its power source? Can you access it?'

'Well, yes, but destroying it would be suicide. Its powered by the remains of Robotropolis, my alternate counterpart's former city. I launched a nuclear missile attack on it once the Mobians had successfully recaptured it and declared it as their home. It is now surrounded by a field of its own that contains the radiation. If we were to make any attempt to disable or damage it, nuclear fallout would spread across half of the planet. No, it would not work. But I have made a device that can penetrate minor energy fields, but ones the size and power of New Mobotropolis's is beyond its capacity. Perhaps you have some ideas how to remedy that?'

Opal smiled malaciously. 'Fear not, Ivo. There is not a piece of mechanical equipment in existence that can't be improved by Opal Koboi.'

'Excellent!' said Eggman with a firm nod.

'Oh, and Miss Koboi. We must discuss the matter of your wardrobe.'

'My wardrobe,' asked Opal with mixed puzzlement and terror.

'Yes. As you will soon be a high-ranking member of the Eggman Empire, you must wear the attire that shows your status. So, I took the liberty of putting this together.'

From behind his back, Eggman pulled out a version of his own outfit in blue draping over a clothes' hanger.

Opal's expression at the clothing was one of complete repugnance. She looked like she was posing for The Scream.

'They seem to be heading back, sir!'

'WHAT!?!'

Eggman bolted from his seat, roaring with pure anger. He picked up a plate full of dessert and threw it at Snively.

'Get to your station, or else the next plate I throw will be empty! And then I shall pick up the broken shards and toss them at you!!'

'Oh, Opal,' said Eggman debilitatedly. 'I love it when you talk vengeance to me.'

Behind their backs, Snively let a revolted look take over his features. It was taken to the extreme, with all the trimmings. Including forced closed eyes and sharp intake of breath. If anything, it would earn a silver medal for sure, but was easily beaten by Opal's expression, which looked as is she'd just sucked on a bag full of limes, three lemons and one particularly spicy curry.

CHAPTER 14: MURDER MOST FOWL
'This Robotnik character is truly fascinating,' said Artemis. 'If you're looking at him from a psychological point of view. I've observed him by reading data entries and watching recordings of Eggman and his schemes. At an educated guess and a touch of personal theory, I would say his childhood was nonexistant. He had no friends, no pets, nothing of what normal children should have. He only had an older brother he loathed, and a mind comparable to no other. He was neglected by his parents and everyone around him, and that is why he's waged this Napoleon-type campaign. He wishes to have the attention of everyone. He trusts nothing but the machines he himself has built. His intellect is his sole drive in life, and he believes that it is his great power, which it is. He rightfully believes his mind so great, that only he can rule Mobius. He is but a gifted child in the body of a powerful man. He creates machines in the forms of people and creatures because he never had friends, true family, or even a faithful pet like every other child around him. That's why he's doing this. He wants to rule the world to fill the void in his life. A void that has been there since the day he was born. His hatred of all those who paid him no mind he has done away with has since been projected onto one being. One who has foiled all his plans and nefarious schemes despite Eggman's greater intellect. This is what makes him a mad man. A threat. The world's worst enemy, and one of its greatest victims.'

'Don't you have anything non-lethal?'

Omega ran a thorough search through his word program for a hit. Two seconds later, he found the word's definition, and he immediately shot Holly a look of pure revolt at the thought.

'You've been making weapons?' asked Holly, revolted.

'I've had ideas and kept them. When I hacked into Foaly's server after he'd infiltrated mine, I saw schematics for all LEP weapons. They gave me my own ideas and I saved them on my Digi-Pad. The Softnose is the only one I actually had made.'

'Common market alkaline D cell. Should give you about twenty-five shots. More likely twenty-four.'

'Wouldn't a Duracell have been better?'

'Mister Mogul! How nice to hear your voice and verbal intensity.'

'What is it, boy?'

'That stolen satellite of yours. Could you use it to patch me through to Commander Lionel Westwood of G.U.N. please.'

'What!? Has your mind lost its grip on reality? I will never do anything so ludicrous.'

'Really. Tell me, that SWATbot that was decapitated by Butler. Is it undergoing repairs?'

'Yes. This very moment. I see what you're doing, Fowl. You're trying to intimidate me by having me remember a display of your bodyguard's skill. Well I am not so easily shaken. I could break him like the most bantam woodland offshoot.'

'That wasn't it at all, my companion. For you see, before it was taken away, I had a friend of mine go into your casino and place a bottle of something inside it. The liquid is well know in my time, but I'm not sure if you've heard it here. Does the term nitroglycerine ring a bell?'

Mogul's eyes widened, and despite his vast vocabulary, there were only a few small words that came to him in this situation. Many of them only four letters long.

'Do I have your attention? Good. There is a tiny microscopic machine inserted in the bottle's lid that will issue a spark when I input the command on my ship. If that happens, it will explode, and the SWATbot's body will act as shrapnel, causing mass panic and destruction of property. The authorities are bound to look into that. Especially if anyone's hurt. And you don't want them digging too far into your business, Mister Mogul. Why, who knows. You're overlander rival might use his connections to see all your secrets are revealed, one by one.'

'Ready satellite lasers Juliet Charlie Foxtrot 16, Tango India Quebec, Delta Hotel Bravo Sierra Hotel, Papa Alpha Mike, Echo 123 Bravo and Sierra Lima Juliet 1. Take aim at the new coordinates I just fed into the computer and fire on my command.'

'Err... Sir? We haven't been given clearance to-'

'I gave you an order solider! Now get ready to launch the strike when I give the word.'

'You do realise what we're about to do, don't you, Artemis?'

'Yes. We're about to launch an attack on a futuristic fortess with an alien hedgehog hybrid, a voluptuous thieving bat, a robot with more weapons than a small army, a two-tailed genius fox, a royal squirrel tactician, and a speedy blue hedgehog who's had such an active love life that his theme song should be Mambo No. 5.'

'Good. Just so I know.'

Butler let out a short chuckle at his dwarf friend's expense.

'I think you've just found yourself some competition, Mulch,' he said with a large smile on his face. It wasn't something that appeared often.

'Eggman robots detected. Conversion into toaster ovens imminent.'

Butler let off two shots. One to penetrate the robot's outer shell, and another to fry its inner circuits.

The metallic door opened with a whoosh, revealing a room lit with elecrtic lights and the size of a warehouse.

'Looks like this factory doubles as a storage facility,' said Butler as he looked around the room.

They were standing a platform surrounding the area's four walls with little bridgers here and there. At ground level were hundreds of robots in sleep mode, their guns resting at their sides and built-in bloodlust waiting to be dampened. Egg Gunners, Egg Fighters and Egg Shooters, all right in front of them. They would never make it.

'The moment Eggman detects us here, we're done for,' analysed the manservant.

'Maybe not,' said Shadow. 'The Egg Grapes are only two corridors away after this room. If the heavy-hitters stayed behind for a few minutes, the robots would be too distracted and you'd have a clear shot.'

'What!?!' exclaimed Sally. 'There's only you, Sonic and Omega here. You don't honestly think you could take on an entire army, do you?'

As the words came out of her mouth, Sally realised they could actually do it. Sonic had the speed, Shadow had the ability and Omega definitely had the fire-power.

'Relax, Sal,' said Sonic. 'One Super Sonic Spin and I'll plow right through these guys.'

'The supports underneath the platforms would give you some cover and hide you in shadow,' said the Ultimate Lifeform. 'We stick together and we die today. Devided we can conquer.'

'And it'll only be a few minutes. Tops.'

Sally looked thoughtful, then sighed before replying. 'OK. Everybody, down underneath the platforms.' She turned to Sonic and his allies. 'You three, good luck. Don't be too long now.'

'Since when have I been long with anything?' said Sonic in his usually cocky way.

Sally just shook her head and jumped off the platform to join the others.

Shadow pulled out his guns from Omega's stomach and took the safety off them both. Sonic flexed his legs and E-123 got his weapons prepped.

Then the lights of the robot army lit up, red and pulsing. Then they stood tall to face the invaders and prepared to fight. Then the bullets flew.

Shadow and Omega jumped in the air and carried out their assault from above. Sonic did exactly what he said he would and transformed into a living buzz saw while moving at speeds near mach one so as to avoid a sonic boom and deafen everyone.

Shadow's bullets melted right through the casing of the robots. Omega had to stick to his more powerful ammunition along with his lasers and energy cannons.

Shadow's bullet ran out within a minute and he had to resort to the Shadow Rifle, which pearced every robot it shot and caused them to either shut down from malfunction or explode. Then the energy lag set it, and it was time to resort to close quarters.

His considerable strength alone wouldn't cover it, but strength combined with massive velocity would more than definitely make the cut.

Shadow lunged at an Egg Gunner and clutched himself to its chest with his legs, pounded it with two dozen puches in less than a second. Another Gunner readied a rocket and launched, only for Shadow to disappear from view barely a second before it hit. It instead impacted on the first Gunner and caused it to explode.

More Egg Gunners homed in on Shadow, shooting like crazy only for him to evade with amazing speed.

He zoomed between two Gunners and swinged his arms at their legs to topple them then flipped over in mid-air and kicked them straight into four of their buddies.

One Gunner launched another rocket at Shadow. He reacted quickly by gently grabbing the rocket and directing it back to where it came from, causing the Egg Gunner's head to be ripped from its place.

Then two Egg Fighters flanked Omega from behind and secured his arms. Lasers sped out of each one, trying to shoot off the legs of each robot. Before he was successful, another Egg Fighter holding some sort of device that looked like a suction cup with a lightbulb base on top came up to Omega and placed the curious gadget on him. His weapons immediately retracted into his body.

'Your weapons are shut down,' said the robot facing Omega. 'Surrender now and you will be converted back to the Eggman Empire.'

Omega wasn't particularly hyped about that idea, so he wrapped his arms around those of the Egg Fighters holding him until he was able to elbow them both in the stomach area. The robots flew back, but their arms had such a tight grip they stayed with Omega.

Then the ultimate E-Series robot went into a whirlwind of melees which shook the arms off and sent any Egg Fighters he collided with into the wall. The moment they made impact with the hard surface, it looked as if they'd been through a trash compactor.

'D'Arvit!' exclaimed Holly.

'Is there really any need for such language, Hol- D'Aaaaarviiiiit!' said Artemis, once he saw what Holly had seen.

As Artemis inpsected one of the Egg Grapes, he experienced a familar ardour explode inside his cranium. It was like a bubble of euphoria bursting inside his head, coating his mind in a joyous hysteria. He let his elated bliss spread out across his features, forming into a conceited smile.

'You are at my mercy, Fowl,' spat Opal. 'And this time there will be no escape.'

'Really? Which one of your more deluded voices told you that?' retorted Artemis.

CHAPTER 15: THE WAR BEGINS
'You have done well to get this far, my furry little friends,' said Eggman with merciless anticipation. 'But your trouble-making and your lives end here.'

Eggman roared to the ceiling with laughter until the sides of his throat felt like they would split.

'That's been something that's troubled me for a long time. I laugh hard and it hurts. Do you see the ominous meaning of that, Sonic? Whenever I laugh, there is pain! Think of all the times I've laughed, rodent! Think of all the pain I've caused!!'

The Doctor was rampant behind the wheel of his destructive machine.

'Death to humans!' he yelled out in an absolute frenzy. 'Death to hedgehogs! Death to Mobians! Death to every last stinking creature on this planet! By the gods, if that's what it takes to achieve victory, then I... shall... Have it!' he stated, two of the last words said between manic pantings before the final roar of declaration.

Eggman ran for it before the Freedom Fighters could pounce on him, only to run into Butler's chest with the force of a car hitting a brick wall. Eggman smiled sheepishly and raised his hands in the hope that the man monster would spare him. No such luck.

Butler pulled back a brick-sized fist for extra spring and let fly into Eggman's face, causing the mad dictator to get thrown head first into a vat of machine oil.

Sonic let out a low whistle. 'Nice punch, big guy. I think you caught the old egg-meister on chins three through five.'

'Computer! Shut down all life-support systems for the Egg Troll and re-route the power to the shields.' Eggman smiled gleefully. No neutrino charges would be getting through that shield barrier anytime soon with all that extra power.

Butler was in panic. The Neutrino was no good, and if bullets did rupture the field, it could move on to hit Artemis. Quickly, his militaristic brain thought up a new plan.

He took off one memory latex glove and sliced it in half with the Swiss army knife he kept in his pocket. The tool was average, but the blade it came with had been sharped until it could cut through bamboo.

Butler tore off his sleeve and wrapped the severed glove around his shoulder, then charged at the Egg Troll.

He ran full speed, building up momentum. His breathing caused the tissue attached to his chest to cause him pain, but the bodyguard pressed on.

Finally, two seconds before he collided head on, he jumped into the Egg Troll's stomach, the impact-gel in the glove protecting his shoulder from breaking or further injury.

The Egg Troll toppled to the ground and Butler ran up its body. He put his right foot on its head as it collapsed against a platform sideways on and jumped high into the air.

Soon, he was inches away from the field Artemis was trapped in. Then, with only seconds of opportunity at his liberty, Butler slammed the energy sphere between two fists and it shattered.

He and Artemis both fell to the ground. Artemis landed on hard metal and his right hand had been crushed in the process.

Butler was less fortunate. The Egg Troll had grabbed him by the leg mid-fall and swung him up in the air, causing his knee to pop out. The Egg Troll then fired a talon and Butler took Artemis's place trapped up in the air.

'Well come on, Doodah! Full speed.'

'I'm givin' her all she's got, Captain!'

'You just had to say it, didn't you?'

'Yeah!'

'Members of the Council of Acorn, thank you for coming. I have summoned you here today to alert you to a new crisis. With his new machines and robots, Eggman's declared a new war on us. I do not want him to have the upper hand again. In the last two Robotnik Wars, we were unprepared. We were at their mercy. So I suggest we enact preparations for war. But not just us. Our allies too. Eggman's terror has effected all of Mobius, and it's time all of Mobius fought back. We should get into contact the United Federation and make sure they're ready to fight. They can help us in the war effort.'

Hamlin was about to speak and open for debate, but Sally cut over him.

'Please, if we are to make ourselves ready, we must act fast. No talking. Just a vote to decide our action. Please.'

Sally took off her boots and slid them underneath her bed, tired. When she took off her vest, she heard the sound of plastic falling on a hard floor. She looked down to where the noise had come from, and picked up a thin SD card. Sally could guess what it was and slipped it into NICOLE, hoping her advanced computer could cope with the ancient technology and sat down on a chair nearby.

Luckily, it did. Then a message popped up on to the screen in bright neon green letters.

'DEAR PRINCESS SALLY,' it read. 'THOUGH WE HAVE KNOWN EACH OTHER ONLY A SHORT WHILE, I FEEL WE HAVE BECOME CLOSE. THAT A FRIENDSHIP BLOSSOMED AFTER YOU HELPED SAVED THE LIVES OF ME AND MY COMRADES. AND WHAT ARE FRIENDS IF THEY CAN'T PULL YOU OUT OF THE GUTTER? SEEING AS YOUR PERSONALITY IS SO CLOSE TO AN ELFIN FRIEND OF MINE, I CAN EASILY GUESS WHAT YOU'RE NEXT MOVE WILL BE. HERE'S SOMETHING TO HELP YOU ALONG THE WAY. THE FOLLOWING IMAGES ARE BLUEPRINTS FOR LASER WEAPONS, BOTH OF FAIRY DESIGN AND MY OWN. THE TECHNOLOGY DOESN'T EXIST IN MY TIME TO MAKE THESE SORT OF THINGS, BUT HOPEFULLY THEY'LL HELP TO REDUCE A FEW AUTOMATONS TO SO MUCH SLAG TO BE SCRAPED OFF THE FLOOR. GOOD LUCK FACING DOCTOR EGGMAN. ARTEMIS FOWL II.'

By the time Sally had finished reading the note, her jaw dropped from a gasp right in the middle, to be replaced by a warm smile of gratitude. They had it this time. A real chance of winning.

'NICOLE,' said Sally to her computer friend. 'Contact Sir Charles Hedgehog immediately. Ask him if he can come out of retirement for a while. I've got some tech for him to assemble that's right up his alley...'

Eggman was in his personal shooting range, dressed in nothing but slippers and a bath robe, his moustache still wet from the shower.

He was hefting one of his Egg Boomers, blasting the heads of various Sonic dummies. Shooting the head off his most loathed foe was soothing for him. The noise of it exploding poetic. And its essence purely inspirational.

Eggman then took his EB-917 Blaster Rifle and completely obliterated the last of the dummies. Vowing that one day, he would do the same to the real Sonic and all his friends.

EPILOGUE
FOWL MANOR, IRELAND, FIFTY YEARS AHEAD OF CURRENT TIME

'Who's this little guy?'

'Ricky. My nephew's pet chipmunk.'

FOWL MANOR, PRESENT

Artemis Fowl the Second swooped past his mother, leaving her stunned for a moment, and reached his study and fired up his computers.

He started creating blue-prints for nuclear fallout shelters hidden five miles underground that could survive the new apocolyptic enviroments. It would take many years to iron out all the wrinkles, but Artemis Fowl could never pass up a challenge. He was about to face his most testing and important mission. The most important of all time. The guaranteeing of the human race's survival.

THE END

=Dialogue= 'Fast is my middle name. Well, it's my first, actually.'

'So... How smart is this guy? And more to the point, what kind of smart?'

'Every kind. Try thinking of him as a cross between Stephen Hawking and Top Cat.'

=Rating=  What would you rate this story (Sonic Meets Artemis Fowl/Artemis Fowl: The Future Chase) as? 0 (pants) 1 (poor) 2 (alright) 3 (good) 4 (very good) 5 (best story in the universe!)