User blog comment:Kagimizu/Broken/@comment-2215825-20121225225949/@comment-2215825-20121226003142

"I want something that will make this month worth going through. I want something that will show me it will get better and that there's more worth living for."

Well I'm sorry Kagi, but you're not going to get it. I can't make every user love you by asking them to. I can't drive to Portland, knock on every door 'til I find yours and give you my XBox. I can't snap my fingers and make you happy. I don't know where things will go. I can't see the future in a magic crystal ball, but I know that the world around us is what we make it! Look at me! A month ago I was as angry....well, not ''as angry and sad and....my nadir wasn't as bad as yours, but I was in pretty bad shape. And then I just left, and I started seeing the wworld the way I wanted to. I wanted to be happy, so I became happy. I can't see the future, but I can get a pretty good idea from how you've been acting the last few months:


 * "It seems more and more like people say what they want from me... but no-one gives a flying damn what the hell I want!!"


 * "This whole f***ing month has been one problem or one disappointment after another. I wish the 21st had actually been the end of the world..."


 * "I soooooo want to make a vent blog so I can rant, rave, yell, scream, and cry about all of the ways this month has been one huge load of absolute f***ing S**T!!"


 * "Mood: Pissed off, Frustrated, Stressed, Angry"


 * "What I'm Doing: I don't even f***ing know..."


 * "Maybe I should just make myself deaf. Then I wouldn't have to listen to this bullcrap..."

You want people to feel bad for you. Well, we aren't anymore Kagi. You've been going on like this for months, over little things like life or friends and we've simply chalked it up to you being emo. We got tired of it, tired of trying to comfort you because we kinew you'd shrug us off and keep moping until you calmed down. But then something else would happen and the cycle would repeat. Your words may not have been as extreme, and your feelings as powerful as now, but you've been spiraling down for months Kagi. And you say you want help, but we've been trying to help and you just ignored us. What you really want is pity, and I'm sorry but I won't deliver this time.

And really Kagi, can you accept when you've screwed up? I don't expect a quote, or a link, or a screencap from you. I expect you to look at yourself honestly. You've lost everything, or at least you keep saying you have! You lost your adminship, a good many friends, your credibility, your influence here. All of that doesn't disappear without a good chunk of it being your fault...and, again, I'd know. It all happened to me. Whether you do accept it or not, you lost your adminship. You keep saying it's because you think people are being biased Kagi, but they're not. The users genuinely don't ttust you as admin anymore. Just Guy's word or Shou's word would make them stop believing in you Kagi, only you made them stop believing in you. Mak stopped, Xi stopped, I stopped, half the Wiki stopped and that's why your demotion was legitimate Kagi, no matter how much you want to deny it.

So here's me, my heart wretching behind this stupid screen because as much as I want to help you, I know these words will just fly over your head. I'll be hit with another wall of text, you'll refuse to accept anything I've written, and I could do this all night but really, who the f*ck am I kidding? I'm not going to help you...I don't know if anyone can give you the happy ending you want here Kagi. There's a distinct lack of happy endings on SFW. It's sort of a low point.