Thread:Wikikinetic/@comment-36919080-20180922105654/@comment-32712012-20180922132320

All right, I've critiqued the characters and have some feedback on them:
 * William John Red: The article generally looks good; could use some minor copyediting, but generally looks pretty much good to go. I did have a few questions about its contents, though, namely:
 * In the Personality section, it says that Sophia Rose hurt him, but doesn't explain how. Could you help explain that in the article?
 * Also in the Personality section, it mentions the existence of something called the POTUS, but doesn't explain what that is. Knowing what that is would also be good.
 * In the History section, it never explains how William meets Sophia, skipping from after he sees the voice's owner (I assume Sophia) go by and "[pants] himself a death blue, [hiding] in a knight's armor" to when he gives Sophia a rose on Valentine's Day. Knowing how they met seems very important, and since it says how they met on Sophia's page, you might want to transfer that over (changing it to be from William's point of view).
 * I know that Keyblades are supposed to be something from another universe, but I don't know what they are and a lot of your readers probably don't either, so you might want to change them to something more easily explained.
 * Aside from those four things, the article looks good!

On a side topic: Were you trying to ask me to give you the links to the other places? I wasn't able to tell. If you were, I'd be happy to give them; I just don't want to give you something that you don't want to have.
 * Sophia Rose: This article has a lot fewer things that need fixing than William's. Basically, all that seems to need fixing her—aside from maybe some minor copyediting—is that it still doesn't explain Keyblades and that it mentions Stormtroopers (who shouldn't exist in this universe as far as I know). The rest of the article looks great, though!