User blog comment:Wh!te$tar/Another Roleplay that probably won't get finished/@comment-27765057-20120921205904

You might want to revise the plot a bit, as some parts of it don't really connect with each other. For instance, if the true goal is for the users to try and get back to the real world, then the part with Sega cutting Sonic Team doesn't really need to be there.