User:Jcfreak16/ Sonic Back to Nature

A piece of Sonic fanfiction written by me. Character of JC owned by me, FFF owned by User:Fairfieldfencer and all Sonic characters owned by Sega and Archie.  Jcfreak 16  16:20, June 4, 2010 (UTC)

Back to Nature
JC didn’t have too many days he could sleep in late. But this day was one of them. And oh how he was enjoying it in blissful sleep. Nothing could ever wake him up from his-

'''CRASH! '''

JC bolted up from his bed and looked around in a panic. He eventually realized what it was and sighed. Not again. Not on the day he could sleep in! He quickly dressed, combed his hair and brushed his teeth before heading down the hall. His bedroom was on one of the top floors, one of the floors he owned in the large building he lived in with his friends. He slowly shuffled his way to the elevator door and went in.

“Good morning JC,” yawned Fairfieldfinder, who was already in the elevator. He owned the floors above JC. “Woke you up too?”

JC nodded his head. “Yeah, thought for a second the whole place was falling down.”

“Me too,” FFF said as he yawned once more. “Sorry, I haven’t had my tea yet.”

“Haven’t had my coffee yet,” JC said as the elevator came to a stop at the bottom floor and the doors opened. The place was a madhouse. There was yelling and screaming and people flying through the air and more importantly, someone had eaten all of the waffles.

“JC! FFF!” a voice came through the crowd as a certain squirrel girl pushed her way to the front.

“Hey Sal,” They both mumbled as they each headed to get to the kitchen to get their respective morning drinks.

“We’re on strike! We’re sick and tired of what you put us through every single week! We demand better hours and conditions!” She said angrily.

“On strike again eh?” Fairfieldfinder said as he began sipping his Earl Grey.

“We want pay too!” A familiar voice burst through the crowd. JC groggily turned around and saw it was Sonic, the main star himself.

“You know guys, we don’t even get paid as fan writers,” JC mumbled as he added extra sugar to his double shot of coffee.

Sally shook her head. “Look, pay or no pay things need to change around here. You know the last time we had a day off?”

“A couple months ago,” FFF replied.

JC continued adding sugar to his coffee. “Yeah, we had that six month break. I remember that.”

Sonic scratched his head. “I think he’s right Sal, I do rem-”

Sally facepalmed. “Well, when was the last time we did something we wanted to do?”

JC looked down at his cup and realized he needed more coffee. He began pouring it while FFF answered, “What do you mean Sally?”

“When was the last time you let us, all of us characters, choose something we want to do? Every week we do this and that for the fans or for you guys. But what about us?”

JC began drinking from his half-gallon coffee cup as he shrugged his shoulders. Swallowing a mouthful he said, “Alright then, we let you do what you want to do will ya come back to work for us?”

“Even though we’re fan writers and could make you come back to work anytime we feel like it,” FFF said smirking.

“Now now Fairfield old buddy! We should be the gentlemen here, even though we’ve never been before,” JC remarked with a twinkle in his eye.

Sonic began tapping his foot, tired of all this talking. “Look Sal, let’s ask for a hundred chilidogs and leave, alright? Sound good?”

Sally huffed and shook her head. “No! We discussed this before, remember?”

“We did?” Sonic asked in confusion.

“Ugh,” Sally said as she rolled her eyes. She turned around to face JC and FFF still sipping their respective drinks. “We want to go on a trip.”

JC’s ears perked up. Maybe it was from the caffeine and sugar, he wasn’t sure. “Trip eh?”

“Yes, a trip. A trip together, all of us, to the great outdoors,” Sally stated matter-of-factly.

FFF, JC and Sonic stared at her. “The great outdoors?” FFF asked. Sally smiled and nodded her head.

“Yes! We want to go camping! Live off of the land, become one with nature, just like the old days when we were Knothole,” Sally’s eyes glazed over with happiness as she spoke.

JC leaned in and whispered to Sonic, “Did she fall on her head or something this morning?”

“I don’t know, this is the first I’ve heard of the camping part. She just told me she wanted to get a free trip. I was hoping Disney World,” Sonic whispered back.

“Guess that didn’t work out,” JC said shaking his head. “Major bummer.”

“I can hear you two!” Sally shouted. “And I personally think we’ve been around all this,” she motioned around her, “for too long.” JC took another sip of his coffee before scrunching up his face in disgust. He quickly pulled a Mountain Dew out of the cabinet and mixed in with the coffee before taking another drink. “Stuff like that,” Sally said, “It’s disgusting.”

“What?” JC asked. “I need my sugar and caffeine! Else I’m a very grumpy person.”

“He is,” Fairfieldfinder quickly said as he pulled out a scone and began chewing on it.

Sally rolled her eyes. “Whatever. So? Are you going to give us a trip, or are we going to have to quit?”

“Let me uh... converse with my partner,” FFF said as he pulled JC aside. “What do you think we should do JC?”

JC shrugged and pulled a fruitcake out from under the counter. “I personally think we should get her to dance to Barbie Girl but hey, I’m cool with a trip to the middle of nowhere. I’m a nature lover at heart,” he said before dunking the fruitcake in the coffee/Mountain Dew/sugar concoction and taking a big bite out of it.

Fairfieldfinder shook his head. “I don’t know. This just sounds like it will cause a lot of trouble to me... I was hoping we could erase their memories of today’s events and go on pretending nothing happened.”

JC stroked his non-existent beard thoughtfully. “Well, this wouldn’t be much of a story if we just did that.”

“True. But unfortunately, I cannot go with you on the trip. I have things I’m working on here.”

“Aw phooey. How am I supposed to handle all of them?” JC said in a panic.

Fairfieldfinder raised an eyebrow. “Yeah... more like how will they all handle you...”

“You sure you don’t wanna come?” JC asked with big round eyes.

“And stay in this story a second longer? No thanks,” FFF said shaking his head. “It’s been fun friend, but now I really must go. My soaps are on anyway.” And with that, Fairfieldfinder left in a puff of smoke.

“.... How did he do that?” JC wondered to himself.

“Hey, what did you guys decide?” Sally asked impatiently. Sonic was trying to tiptoe away from her when she caught him by the ear and pulled him back. “Don’t you even think about it mister.”

“But I’m hungry!” Sonic moaned. “And all they have around here are scones and... fruitcake.”

“Quiet!” Sally snapped. “Now JC, what is your decision?” She said as she pointed dramatically.

JC finished the last of his drink and fruitcake and leaned against the counter. “Well, Fairfield didn’t want to go on a trip. Said he had things to do here. However, I’m game for the idea.”

Sally’s finger drooped. “Y-you’re coming with us?”

JC shook his head. “I’ll just stick around for narration and what-not. You guys are going to be on your own for the most part.”

“YAAAAY!” Sonic squealed while clapping his hands. JC and Sally stared in stunned silence. “I... just, uh... fumes. Fruitcake fumes. Getting to me,” Sonic stuttered.

“Pack your bags Sonic, because we’re going back to nature!” Sally said excitedly as she pointed dramatically.

“Well right now, nature’s calling,” JC said squirming, “That’s what I get for drinking over half a gallon of liquids before page four!”

And so, the entire Sonic crew began packing, eager to get away from the madness for awhile. JC packed all of his narrator gear too, he was going to tag along and tell everyone what was happening. He was getting in practice when...

“JC!”

He sighed. “Yes Sally. Is there a problem?”

Sally glared at him. “There most certainly is. How in the world are we going to get the campgrounds?!”

“I could just write us all there...”

“No. We have to do it normally,” Sally stated emphatically. “No author powers on the entire trip. Do you understand?”

A black shadow appeared over JC. “No... author powers? None at all? Not... not even one itty bitty teeny-weeny one?”

“Especially not an itty bitty teeny-weeny one.” Sally crossed her arms emphatically.

“Fine,” JC sighed. A ray of sunlight suddenly burst through the cloud as JC grinned wildly. “Guess we’ll just have take a ride there.”

“You have a ride for us all?”

JC rubbed his hands together and cackled maniacally. “I most certainly do my princess! Go gather your crew and meet me outside in the parking lot!”

And so a JC ran away laughing, leaving a very confused and slightly worried Sally behind. Twenty minutes later everyone had gathered in the parking lot with all of the gear they would need. JC stood in front of a large object draped in a canvas, trying to stifle his giggles. “Cast of Sonic the Hedgehog! Listen up!”

Sonic grinned. “That’s me by the way gang, the way past cool blue dude with ‘tude!”

“Dude, that’s getting old,” Knuckles said as he facepalmed.

“Hey, at least I could say anything and still be loved by adoring fans,” Sonic laughed. Knuckles face turned red... redder as he tried to hold back from beating the lights out of the hedgehog.

“Anyway, you all may or may not know... actually I’m sure you do know, you all are going away from here for a few days,” JC began, “Now I know you all are heartbroken by this...” Raucous cheers came up from the entire crowd.

“Finally!”

“It’s about dern time!”

“I can see my grandkids again!”

JC scratched his head in confusion. “Err... right. Well, I’m dumping you out in the middle of nowhere with only your wits and large collection of gear to survive for a few days while I go have fun somewhere else. Sound fun?”

“...AWESOME! JC is going to leave!”

“YES! Freedom!”

“I love you man!”

JC’s eye twitched. “Riiiiiight. So, everyone... here is your ride!” JC sauntered over to the canvas and pulled out a remote. “Some appropriate music?” He pressed a button and the Macarena began blasting throughout the parking lot. “Err... try this again, button two,” JC pressed another button and a Demi Lovato song began playing. A few snickers came sailing from the back as JC’s face turned red. “Well uh... button three...” He pressed it and Grand Funk Railroad – We’re An American Band began playing.

“What does this song have to do with anything?” Tails whispered to Sonic.

Sonic shrugged. “It’s JC man. Just keep smiling and play along.” Tails nodded his head and smiled brightly along with Sonic.

JC grinned and pulled at the canvas. “BEHOLD!” He cried. Before realizing the canvas was stuck. He tugged on it again. And again. His eyes suddenly glowed red as he jerked the canvas off and threw it spinning through the air. “TA-DA!”

Silence filled the parking lot, aside from the song from the background. Finally, Sally pointed and stammered, “We’re riding in... that... thing?”

JC nodded his head. “Groovy ain’t it?” He turned and admired his custom-finished Volkswagen bus. “I’ve spent countless long hours working on my baby. And now you guys get to ride in it!”

The lot grew quiet once more as everyone tried to figure out a way to magically disappear. Knuckles suddenly spoke up. “Well, I must say, it’s a shame we can’t all fit in it. There’s too many people here!” Murmurs of approval ran through the crowd as they nodded her head in agreement.

JC held up his hands. “No problem fellas! Like I said, it’s a custom. I’ve made the inside bigger than the outside!” He threw open the side doors with a flourish. “Eat your heart out Matt Smith.”

It was once again quiet, even the song had finished. A moan escaped from the back. Sally sighed and turned to face everyone. “Well guys... I guess we’re ready to travel! It won’t be a... long trip. And the windows are tinted, so no one will see us in there!” The crowd muttered sadly. “Now come on! Cheer up! Your princess demands it!”

“ROLL CALL!” JC shouted. “Step into the bus and pick a seat when I call your name. If your name isn’t called, then you’re stuck here with nothing fun to do. Don’t worry about bringing your luggage in, I’ll be taking care of all that. Complimentary services! Now, first up...Sonic the Hedgehog!”

Sonic zoomed in, throwing his luggage beside JC. “First dibs! Woohoo! And... oooooh, nice plasma screen!”

“Amy Rose!” Amy brought up twenty or so bags and threw them all down beside JC.

“Wait for me Sonic! We can sit beside each other!”

“Sally Acorn!” She stepped up and placed her luggage beside Sonic’s. “Tails the Fox!” He flew by, dropping his pack with the rest. “Antoine D’Coolette! Bunnie Rabbot D’Coolette!” Antoine and Bunnie set their packs in the pile. “If you have any problems with your transportation Bunnie, do call me, alright?”

“I have one smoll probleem,” Antoine said as he pulled out his sword. “And I am looking at heem.”

JC gulped. “Right! We will take your problem up with the committee and get back to you at a later time! NEXT! Knuckles and Julie-Su!” They walked by and set their pack down.

“We only need one. It’s much easier for us echidnas to rough it,” Knuckles said proudly as he walked in with Julie-Su.

JC rolled his eyes. “Nicole the Lynx?” Nicole walked by and set down her pack. “How can you... be here?”

Nicole giggled. “Well, Sally was kind enough to bring the handheld. And after Tails did some modifications, I can exist in my biological form if I’m near it! Isn’t that nice of them?” She said beaming.

“Quite nice indeed. Go on now! Next is... Dr. Eggman? Snively? Lien-Da? I don’t remember scrawling them on my list...”

“DOHOHOHOHO! We evil geniuses need a break too you know! And the hired help might as well come along,” Dr. Eggman said as he set an enormous pack down beside the rest.

“Wait, you’re hiring us? You’re paying us now Uncle?” Snively asked hopefully.

“DON’T BE RIDICULOUS!” Eggman thundered.

“Yes Snively, don’t be ridiculous,” Lien-Da mimicked. “Now come along you big nosed freak.”

“Hmph,” Snively huffed angrily. “I’m not a big-nosed freak. That... whatever Muppet is a big-nosed freak. I am an abused genius!”

“SNIVELY!”

“Coming Uncle...” Snively whined.

JC scratched his chin. “I still don’t remember inviting those guys. Oh well. Nothing bad can come from having a bunch of heroes share a bus ride with the world’s most evil villains! And our next trio I did invite, Shadow, Rouge and Omega!” They quickly laid their packs down and looked around contemptuously.

“Looks like this is worse than a low-class ride,” Rouge said turning up her nose.

“There’s a Jacuzzi,” JC added nonchalantly. Rouge immediately disappeared into the bus. “We probably won’t see her until the end of the trip.”

“IS NICOLE ON THIS TRIP AS WELL?” Omega asked hopefully.

“Yup,” JC nodded his head.

Omega smiled the best a robot could and waltzed in... the best a robot could. Shadow just shook his head and walked in behind him.

JC put away the list and turned to face the rest of the crowd. “The rest of ya’ll can go home now.”

“But... Mr. JC... I haven’t been on a trip with my Mommy since-”

“Sorry Cream. Ms. Vanilla. But you’re technically not in the comic,” JC interrupted.

“Grr... YOU’LL BE HEARING FROM MY LAWYERS YOU STUPID PUNK!” Cream stomped off dragging her Mother along.

“Hey... what about me?”

“Who are you?” JC asked.

“I’m Rotor! The Walrus guy! I’m an important part of the Freedom Fighters!”

“... don’t recognize you. Bye!” JC pulled a lever and Rotor disappeared into the ground.

“I... MUST get on this... BUS!”

“No. Last time you came on a trip with us half the gang was tripping!” JC waved Silver off.

“NO! Why must... this BE so?”

“Did you know I wasn’t invited? Did you know I want to come? Did you know I know 423 different road songs for the trip? Did you know BZZRKT...” Omochao was cut off as JC threw a fruitcake at him.

“Takes care of the last little bugger!” JC shut up the doors and jumped in the driver’s seat. “All ready back there gang?”

“Sonic’s head is stuck in the cheese fondue fountain!”

“Shadow took all of the Swiss Rolls!”

“Rouge kicked me out of the Jacuzzi!”

“We just realized you don’t have a driver’s license!”

“Knuckles keeps cheating at All-Stars Racing!”

JC shrugged his shoulders. “Guess we’re all set then!” With that, he peeled out and drove out of sight. Leaving every single piece of luggage and packs sitting in the middle of the parking lot. It’s a good thing it wasn’t going to rain. For at least an hour...

“And welcome one and all to the middle of nowhere!” JC threw open the bus doors.

“We’re lost aren’t we,” Sally snapped as she stuck her head out.

“No. We’re exactly in the middle of nowhere,” JC replied as he breathed in the fresh air deeply.

Sally rolled her eyes and got out just as everyone else piled out on top of her. “This had better be worth it,” she thought.

Everyone got up and looked around at the sights. They really were in the middle of nowhere. There wasn’t even a road, leading several of them to wonder how JC got them here. They were at the base of a large mountain with grassy, tree-covered slopes at the bottom that thinned out towards the top, finally peaking in a snowy top. They all were eager to stretch their legs after the four hour long drive. Sonic and Shadow quickly zoomed off into the distance, turning into black and blue blurs.

Sally however was looking around suspiciously. “You know, this looks nothing like Camp Can’thinkofaname. Are you sure this is the right place JC?”

JC nodded his head. “Of course it’s the right place. I have a perfect sense of direction you know.” Sonic and Shadow zoomed by the group kicking up trails of dust. “Hey watch it you two! I just had a new paint job done on the bus!” JC did a quick head count of the group. “Where’s Rouge?”

“Haven’t seen her since she came on the bus,” Knuckles said nonchalantly as he stretched his arms behind his head.

JC sighed and walked over to the bus. Flipping open a panel, he quickly pressed a few buttons. A shriek was immediately heard from inside the bus. “WHO MADE THE @#$% WATER COLD?!”

“Hey Knuckles, stand in front of the bus for me?” JC asked with a friendly grin as several large bangs came from the inside of the bus.

Knuckles smirked. “Yeah right. YOU stand in front of the bus.” Shadow suddenly ran by and came to a stop in front of the open bus doors.

“Have any of you seen Sonic?” Shadow asked stone-faced. He suddenly heard a large crash from inside the bus behind me and turned around, only to see... and feel a flurry of kicks from a very angry Rouge.

“Whoever turned off the @#$% water will-” Rouge began shouting as Sally quickly covered Tails’ ears. “will be beat so @#$% bad it won’t even be... oh we’re here?” She suddenly perked up and flew into a nearby tree. “Mmmm... nice. I wonder if there’s a cave around here.”

Everyone sighed in relief as Omega picked up a slightly bruised Shadow. Antoine came forward and asked, “Excuse a moi JC, but we would like our loogage about now, if zat is upright?”

“Alright, ‘Twan. Alright,” Bunnie corrected.

“Oui. All is right.”

“Luggage, right,” JC walked over to a compartment in the bus and pulled it out. “It should be in... here...” JC saw there wasn’t any luggage there. At all. “Uh...”

“Wheah is our luggage?” Bunnie asked as her eyes grew dark.

JC began stuttering. “I... oh... I know! It’s... in the parking lot... back home...” The woods suddenly grew quiet. Even the previously chirping birds stopped as if knowing what would happen next.

It was Sally who broke the silence. “Do you mean to say,” she began in a barely controlled voice, “you forgot all of our gear, all our belongings, all of our FOOD, EVERYTHING?!” She tried to jump on JC but Sonic held her back.

“Even the missile I was secretly carrying to blow you all up into itty bitty pieces?” Eggman sobbed.

“I might have...”

“AND WE’RE LOST?!” Sally roared.

“.... we might be...” JC mumbled.

The entire group suddenly burst into a raging scream as they all jumped on JC and began pummeling him. We’re actually just going to edit out the gratuitous fight scene and skip ahead to the part where JC sneaks away, jumps in the bus and drives far, far away.

“COME BACK HERE YOU COWARD!” Sally yelled angrily, her vest partly torn. But JC’s bus sped away until it disappeared in a blinding flash of light.

“He’s warped away,” Shadow said emotionlessly.

“Grrr... I can’t believe he lost all of the luggage! I had my wedding dress in there...” Amy panted as she leaned on her mallet.

Sonic smiled inside. At least something good came out of this! But then he remembered something else and moaned, “My secret chili dog recipe...”

“My jewels!”

“My gadgets I had invented for the outdoors!”

“My Cyndi Lauper collection!” Everyone looked at Shadow. “I... am holding onto it for a friend.”

Knuckles and Julie-Su didn’t seem to be half as concerned as everyone else. “Hey guys, this isn’t going to be a problem! Trust me, surviving in the middle of nowhere is not that hard,” Knuckles said as he sat down under a tree by Julie. “I think we’ll manage, right Jules?” Julie giggled in and snuggled in close to Knuckles. Sonic began making gagging noises until Sally slapped him.