Thread:Wikikinetic/@comment-33279589-20190119123656/@comment-32712012-20190119182022

I took a quick look at each of the articles. I don't have a whole lot of time for this, so I've filtered by what particularly caught my eye.

I found nothing particularly of note in Azmaria's update; same for Genie (though I added markup to her article to make your reference render properly); and same for Yuki (though I'm glad you kept the Hand Sonics intact; I had fun getting those to their crrent state).

I have a couple of things to say for Disco and Madoka. For each of them, something in there really interested me, but left a hole that brought up a question or two.

For Madoka, I'm curious as to how blowing up her home planet has affected her life. I'm not surprised that she did it, given her personality; I'm just wondering how this has affected her personality, if at all. Does she usually feel completely justified and usually not think of it, but feel the need to justify similar things because she doesn't want the destruction to have been wrong? Does she feel guilty over the catastrophic implementation of the plan to avoid Earth's failure, thus fueling her desire to make things work out right and thus her annoyance with others when they mess up (or, alternately, perhaps her annoyance would actually just be a mechanism to cope with her insecurity over this)? You have a lot of possibilites—only some of which I've listed—and I'd be interested to see what you do. (I would appreciate if you'd add something on this note, though, as there's currently a disconnect between her personality and her backstory.)

For Disco, he has some interesting powers, particularly the one where he launches a tornado that—if it hits—will cause temporary lack of control. I think that would work well in roleplay battles, as it would create a scenario where dodging an initial attack is possible (always good), but rather than the initial attack itself being harmful, it leaves the opponent open just long enough for a damaging follow-up, after which they have a chance to move again. However, I can't help but notice that his attacks have no cohesive theme; unlike, say, Genie, whose attacks are almost all obtained from her super strength, or Yuki, who gets the bulk of her power from her Hand Sonics, Disco has no cohesive theme; wind, super speed, shockwaves, fireball, deflection, martial arts...this doesn't all work together. Furthermore, the shockwaves and fireball are powergul enough that I don't know why he'd ever use any others, as they could pretty easily decimate opponents (which is not good; people tend to dislike overpowered characters). I'd recommend removing the shockwave and fireball, turning Disco into a fast, somewhat gimmicky close-combat guy with a focus on wind powers (which would work pretty well). Furthermore, I'd also recommend adding in some weakness pertaining to lack of durability, as a lack of fortitude would nicely round out his strengths and weaknesses. A guy centered around minor loss of control and otherwise basic attacks, but who can't get hit much past his deflection/martial arts defenses would be pretty interesting to see.

There's your feedback. Can't guarantee I'll give this level of detail in the future, as I happened to particularly have fun making this stuff up, but I hope you'll make good use of these ideas for Disco and Madoka. Let me know if you use them; I might or might not have feedback on that, depending on the implementation and how much time I have then.