User blog:Wh!te$tar/Adeo, Goodbye

Well, it looks like two years of SFW are coming to a close. Yeah, I'm leaving for real. I know alot of users leave, and they come back eventually. Believe me, I fully plan on returning someday. But today, I'm officially leaving Sonic Fanon Wiki.

Before you start to make any assumptions, no, I'm not leaving because I'm unhappy with the Wiki. It's true, I'm not exactly content with how the site has changed since I joined, but the real reason I'm leaving is because I'm unhappy...and wholly ashamed of myself. On Sonic Fanon Wiki, I hae said, thought, and done things I hate myself for each day. I've insulted some of my closest friends, looked for ways to bring down users I didn't get along with, and acted immaturely on chat and in blogs. I worked almost obse3ssively to have Guyviroth banned, I've gotten into arguements with Shousenka, and probably worst of all given Kagimizu hell repeatedly because we disagreed on several points.

Believe it or not, I'm not that bad in real life. I'm shy, but once you break open the crust I'm bubbly and peppy and the best parallel I can think of is Rapunzel. I draw obsessively to unfitting music, I watch Smallville, I even sing Disney songs to myself so chores aren't so boring. Hell, I sing When Will My Life Begin first thing in the morning to wake myself up.....where was I? Oh, yeah. Sorry, these things are usually just the thoughts in my head put down as I think 'em up.

Well, my point is on SFW I've become something I'm not. I feel like I've become very angry, sadistic, and brought on my own sense of loneliness which brought about the "nadir" those that go on Xat will more than hapilly tell you about. So....I'm trying to change. I've joined a few new sites, like Tumblr. I've made friends on the FiM wiki chat, and I'm really happy there. It's a second chance for me. In fact, there was a user who acted alot like Guy, but instead of butting heads, I actually tried to be nice to her and now I see we have alot in common.....I want things like that to happen more often. I want to be like Smash and Memphis. I want to be calm and nice and friendly and more like....me. I want to use this new opportunity to learn from my mistakes, and do the right thing when situations like those on SFW arise again. Maybe that way, when I come back, I'll be a not a better user, but a better person, instead of that guy who lost his adminship and friends.

So...I guess there's not much else to say. No, I won't be editing in Genetix, though the rp's pretty much dead from what I can see. No, I'm not giving away my characters, and I'd appreciate it if you guys stopped anyone from vandalising them. And, lastly but most importantly, just thanks to all the users who helped me. Thanks Smash, Memph, for being role models even though I did a pretty awful job trying to be like you. Thanks Light. I know we've drifted away, but you'll always be my best friend, even if I don't like you "that way". Thanks.....thanks Xi, Shima, Ryu, Flash, Draon, Shad, Gale, Jon, Tails, Mak, GD, Nero, Hikaru.....wow....I've met alot of people. Just, thanks for the memories. And, most of all, thanks Kagi. I know I already told you this, but I really mean it. Thanks for stopping me from making alot of awful mistakes and making things worse for myself.

Other than that, I guess here are the sites I'll be on if anyone still wants to talk to me:

Deviantart: http://whitestar1802.deviantart.com/

Tumblr: http://whitestar-galleries.tumblr.com/

FiM Wiki, where I've been on chat almost every day: http://mlp.wikia.com/wiki/Special:WikiActivity?&cb=4542

On a final note, sorry for the massive wall of text. Bonus points of you actually managed to read through my ramblings and typos. ^^;